DS started Primary 1 last August (Scotland). I have posted about this before in Chat but it was ages ago so I think likely to have gone by now.
Anyway, at Parents evening which was November, we were told he was having some speech issues. We knew about this. He has trouble with some letters of the alphabet so we are waiting on a speech and language assessment. We were also told about some behaviour issues in class. As a result he was put on to a behaviour chart which worked extremely well.
The chart lasted until Christmas. We came back and were told no need for anything further. I told hi teacher not to leave it if anything hapens again as I had always been a bit angry that she'd left issues from August to November without telling me. However, at the end of January I received a note home from his teacher saying that his behaviour in class and the playground was not acceptable and could we talk to him again. We always do but re-confirmed anyway.
So 10 days ago, another note. Quite firm saying she is very concerned that he is not taking onboard what she is telling him about behaviour and making better choices. We came down on DS quite hard. Next morning he woke to say he didn't want to go to school so I asked why. Response was he was worried about another letter. I told him to behave in class and that wouldn't happen. He then started to cry and said she is never happy with him.
I put a letter back into school saying I wanted to meet with teacher that afternoon and I expected a call to confirm ok. I got a call from the head saying teacher was off sick but she has met my son and he is a lovely, polite boy but is struggling with the structure of being in a class room. I am annoyed again because I was told it was bad behaviour. Anyways, I am told by head to expect a call from teacher next week.
I finally got to meet her on Friday. DS was with me so I instantly feel that I have to be on her side in order that DS sees that we are united and committed rather than me being defensive towards DS in anyway.
She is very firm with DS. I personally didn't like her tone but I suppose that's a teacher and she has another 19 children to look after.
DS behaviour is things like not sitting still, not following instructions - for example having 2-3 things to do and once done he can play but he is not doing the 2-3 things or rushing through it and going off to play.
Also won't play (I forget the word used) but basically, others are playing with say building blocks, DS comes along, mucks about and leaves for the next group of children. Won't sit and play constructively for any period of time.
Forgetting to put had up. Shouting out in class.
She also mentioned that she had been watching him in the playground the day before (before the 9 am bell went) when he was playing with a stick in a small puddle. She told him this wasn't acceptable. He shouldn't have played with the stick as what if he'd gotten wet or the stick hit someone. Similarly, when the bell went he the stick over a fence. She told him he should have made a better choice and that this was unacceptable because the stick could have hit someone so was not good behaviour.
The next point was she asked who is friends are in class. He has several friends at school but only one in his class. He gave the name and his teacher said this boy doesn't behave like he does. She then went on to say you don't have any other friends do you?
Then they were supposed to be icing biscuits for valentines day. He washed his hands but he rubbed his face after so she made him wash again only for him to do it again. He was not allowed to ice after that. DS has a habit of touching his face in a way that I touch my hair kind of thing or push my glasses up my face.
I asked if she thought there was an underlying additional needs issue. She said may be and that would account for the speech issue we have and also if he gets an assessment it should help with the following of instructions. We just need to wait for the assessment to come through.
I have tried to be a thorough as possible. What can I do about the issues in class? He is generally well behaved at home. I am seeing her again a week on Friday and I am asking a friend to take DS as I want to be able to speak back without DS thinking we are against each other.
The speech therapy thing will come.
We need to address the behaviour in class.
Am I being unreasonable (please be kind!) in that the playground stuff is just that, playground and also I don't think she should be playing my son against another pupil, nor do I think she should be passing comment about the number of friends he has in class.
At the end of the meeting she stood up but it was down to me to ask what good points he had, how was his learning coming along all of which were responded to very positively. he is going back on the chart on Monday which she said to DS he is 6 months into P1 and it shouldn't be happening but at that point I did say if he responds well to it and she is happy and he is happy then I don't care.
I don't know if I am looking too much into things but I felt she was very negative to my son. She was standing in her room and through 150 pupils all age 5/6/7 she saw my son with a stick at the other end of the playground - he is easily spottable though with a bright red ski jacket which is being replaced today!
I hope you can help and I hope I have not rambled on too much.
Thanks
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Behaviour/development
Concerned about DS settling into Primary 1. Can you offer some help? Possibly long!
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concernedP1parent · 16/02/2014 09:32
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