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Behaviour/development

18 mo pushing buttons. Help me! And breathe...

14 replies

AprilFoolishness · 12/04/2013 08:55

Some techniques required before I blow a gasket. I am aware I have years of this to come...
18mo twins, both very curious, DS the 'naughtier' in some ways but he does seem to have learnt "no".
Dd just revels in winding me up, but I don't know how to handle it.
So this morning I'm doing nappy changes, both toddling around their bedroom, Peppa pig on iPad (not usual but DS kept me up last night so i was feeling a bit dozy) for entertainment.
Dd goes over to the nappy bin and starts taking the lid off, she knows she's not allowed, I tell her no, take her away by the arm. She does it again, I tell her no and put her back in her cot. I sort out DS, get her out of her cot, she does it again, I put her back in her cot. By the third time back in her cot she's crying instantly, but she keeps doing it!

Then down for breakfast. She throws her cup on the floor, I tell her no. Put it back, she throws it on the floor. I tell her no and take it away. She signs for a drink (neither talk really yet), I praise her for signing, praise her for drinking nicely, she throws it on the floor. I whisk her out of the high chair and put her out of the room.

Assrrrgggh. It's not even 9 and I an feel my blood pressure going, and there's two of them!

Advice?

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MiaSparrow · 12/04/2013 09:38

God help you with two of them but it does get easier the nearer they get to two - longer attention spans mean they'll occupy themselves & play nicely for longer, better vocab means they're less frustrated in general.

You do get the colossal meltdowns though

Hang in there!

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IllegalYoniFarm · 12/04/2013 09:42

I have 22 month twin boys and i could have written your post, really have no advice as im just battening down the hatches in the knowledge it does get better (5 yr old DS too) Grin

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AprilFoolishness · 12/04/2013 09:45

They actually play together nicely a lot. Its just how on earth do you make progress on behaviour/table manners etc when they just think it's a game, then flip into tears, nothing goes in!?!

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AprilFoolishness · 12/04/2013 09:46

They actually play together nicely a lot. Its just how on earth do you make progress on behaviour/table manners etc when they just think it's a game, then flip into tears, nothing goes in!?!

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Norem · 12/04/2013 10:58

April I try "flirt and divert" as I call it when mine are toddlers.
I move them away from whatever it is that you don't want them touching and try and engage them with something else.
If necessary move the item that you don't want touched, not possible sometimes I know.
I use a lot of silly voices and funny faces, it does seem to distract them though and stops us falling into the repeat and repeat bad behaviour :)

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Bumpsadaisie · 13/04/2013 08:45

Goodness, hard work having two 18 mth olds! Respect to you.

Just wanted to add though that in my recollection they can't really "obey" much at this age. You can tell them no, they might understand, but its hard for them to resist the thing they want to do. Don't think your DD is abnormal, in fact if your son obeys you when you say "no" he is quite advanced!

Distraction's the way forward ...

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Bumpsadaisie · 13/04/2013 08:46

Re table manners etc.

Forget this kind of thing for a while yet. They are really young! My DS is 17 mths and still chucks everything everywhere. I have no expectations of him at all at the table.

Perhaps I baby him a bit as he is my second, but i think expecting any kind of "manners" from an 18 mth old you are going to be disappointed!

Smile good luck

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Bumpsadaisie · 13/04/2013 08:48

Just for comparison, in my experience and those of friends kids are getting on for 3 before they can sit politely at the table and generally be obedient and do as they are told.

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WeakAtTheCheese · 13/04/2013 08:50

It will pass. Nearly all toddlers do the throwing cups and repeatedly doing a 'banned' thing. They must grow out of it or we'd see cafes filled with adults throwing their lattes to the ground.

And you've got two doing it at the same time - eek! When dc3 (16mo) does it I just take the cup away or leave it on the floor. Some of the appeal is seeing what happens when they do it. If nothing happens they move on.

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NorthernChinchilla · 13/04/2013 10:42

When I read your title I wondered if you were being metaphorical or literal as my 16 month old DS is obsessed with the stereo/washing machine/dishwasher/oven timer buttons and will not leave them alone Grin!

It is massively frustrating as they just want to do whatever is in their dino-sized brains heads and just get angry if you say no.

I've learnt the same thing from MN as norem; they can't obey, so distract, distract, distract. Say no, take them away from whatever it is, and start engaging them with something, anything else- a wooden spoon, a toy, their shoes.

Or if it's a Friday evening say sod it, let 'em fiddle and have Wine

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LouBeee · 13/04/2013 18:04

NorthernChinchilla - my 19month old DS is exactly the same - so imagine my frustration when I realised that my lovely new Miele washing machine had this amazing function that the door can be opened at any time during the cycle unless the water is over 60 degrees to add those items you've forgotten .. AAAHHH the water was everywhere! I am basically having to wash everything at 60 degrees to stop him opening the door mid cycle

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candr · 15/04/2013 21:03

Mine does this kind of thing while looking you in the eye and saying 'Oh No' as he drops cup off table or takes lid off bin while saying NoNoNo! He thinks it is funny - I do not. Remove and distract, if it doesn't work tell off and remove, ignore tears for 1 minute then tell them what it is you don't want them doing while giving hug and move on. Dosn't work all the time but the message will start getting through. I do sometimes move object in question and replace a few days later when he is not looking. Tis tricky with 2 though, best of luck Grin

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onedogandababy · 15/04/2013 21:14

LouBeee not sure if it's the same on all miele washing machines, but on mine the childlock is activated by holding in the start button for 3 seconds. Hope that helps! Smile

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AprilFoolishness · 15/04/2013 21:35

Ha ha, yes metaphorical and actual buttons equally pushed!

Anyone know about Miele tumble dryers, do they ahve a child lock too?

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