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My younger brother, please help.. advice needed!!

(6 Posts)
AngelMummy2012 Wed 03-Apr-13 18:40:21

Hello, my brother (W) is 8 and he has part of his brain missing. I don't think that affects his behaviour.

My other brother (A) is 5(a twin to my sister).

W is very violent! He even scares me sometime, you can see the rage in his eyes. If A plays with one of his toys or doesn't play how W wants to then W will. Screamin his face, punch him, dig his nails in and today he tryed to strangle him literally!

He's getting worse and if I talk to him about it he will just stare at me and he look wo angry! My mum never does anything and due to her working i look after them over tea time and pit them to bed.

He even threatened to kill A 3 times the other morning itold mum and she didn't do anything.

What do I do? I've never known W to be like this!

usedtobesize8 Wed 03-Apr-13 19:06:01

Don't know how old you are but I would think if your mum trusts you to look after them, she should trust what you are saying. If she still won't listen, can you try talking to a doctor, HV or teacher. you also have needs & it sounds like your mum isn't respecting them.

AngelMummy2012 Wed 03-Apr-13 19:29:37

I'm 18, nearly 19.

I've helped bring him up as mum went through bad post-natal depression and theres something not right with him!

He's been acting really strange recently. I lost my baby boy Riley last April and since then he's gotten worse. If he's not aggressive, hes really emotional and cries alot and talks about Riley.

I think he needs to see someone but i don't think mum will agree and that's her choice.

mummy2benji Thu 04-Apr-13 09:29:07

Bless you, so sorry you lost your baby boy and are now having to deal with this. That's a lot to go through. I'm a GP and I think he needs to see a doctor. It may be that he has some behavioural issues that are related to his condition - I don't know what his condition is so can't comment on that - or if this is just a recent behavioural change he might need something like a water infection ruling out. It sounds like you see more of his behaviour than your mum does, so really if you have concerns then that should be the main factor in taking him to a doctor. Have a chat with your mum and see what she says. If she says no, there is no need, see how things go over the next few days but if you have more incidents like that which worry you, you could just ring up the GP and request a same-day appointment and take him down - while you don't want to cause problems by going behind your mum's back, you can explain to her that an incident had occurred, you were worried and wanted advice. Hopefully she'd be fine with that.

adoptmama Thu 04-Apr-13 10:48:01

It sounds like you are going through a lot yourself, coping not just with your own loss, but your mum's post natal depression and so on. Anyone would find looking after 3 young children very difficult, especially when your brother is showing such violent behaviour. You are doing a great job of keeping all the children safe and well so don't feel bad that your brother is having these problems. They are not your fault and you are showing what a caring big sister you are by trying to find help for him.

I totally agree with mummy2benji. I think you need to get help for your family and especially your brother. Even if your mum does not think your brother needs to see a doctor, you could still go yourself and have a talk to him/her about the kind of problems your brother is having and get some advice. If it is safe for the other children, maybe your could even film his behaviour on your phone and show it to your mum/doctor. Maybe mum just does not understand how bad his behaviour is. Also keep a written note of the incidents; what happened that made him violent, what he did, how long the behaviour lasted and what calmed him down, as this could help the doctor figure stuff out.

adoptmama Thu 04-Apr-13 10:49:54

Just a thought too that coming up the annieversary of your baby's death may also be affecting him and making things worse.

flowers to you, because you are really going through a tough time just now.

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