Really struggling with 9 month old sleeping

[LaDenf]

My DS has just turned 9 months and I am currently having a really tough time with getting him to sleep in his cot

Up until 10 days ago I co-slept with him, however DH and I decided that the time was about right to move him into his cot - he has never slept more than 4 hours in one go and we thought that letting him have his own space might help him - it hasn't; although that is another thread altogether

One of our main issues is that DS seems to hate bedtime and sleeping in general. We have, what I feel, is a good bedtime routine. It roughly starts after DS has his dinner at about 5ish. We usually take him up for a bath about 6.15pm, read to him, BF him and try and put him down at about 7pm.

Recently he has started to cry when he goes for his bath, I suspect that this is largely that he knows what is coming. He calms down during his bath (as he realises he enjoys them) but starts getting worked up at the reading stage, calms down when BF, then gets REALLY worked up when we lay him down. Whilst he was in my bed this wasnt too much of a problem as we could lie with him and he will drift off, in his cot we cannot do this. He has never slept on his back so and only settles when lying on his side, trying to leave him to sleep is almost impossible as he will just roll over and start crying.

I also think that he is teething, he spends a lot of his time pulling at his ears and rubbing his mouth, although no teeth have come through!!

We do use a dummy but only to settle him at night and we have been trying to wean him off this. He has stopped using it during the night but still needs it to "drift off" although we tend to take it out of his mouth before he falls asleep, the initial settling of him still requires a dummy.

Any help / advice would be welcome from those who have been in a similar position. I am not keen on the idea of controlled crying and only want to use this as a last resort however it is often taking us nearly 2 hours to get him to sleep. Maybe the move to the cot has been harder on him than I thought it would be.

I am getting a bit desperate now - I am writing this on New Years Eve! I go back to work in a couple of months and things really need to improve.

Happy New Year to everyone :)

[daisydee43]

My dd is nearly 9 mths, she moved into her own room at 7 mths and it took a while. She will only sleep in a travel cot, not wooden one but as long as she sleeps I don't mind lol. I know it's prob frowned apon but she has a dummy and watches in the night garden DVD on a sleep timer. I feed her at 5pm then bath and let her play off bit until bed between 7 and half past. For the first week she cried in her cot for up to 2 hrs (obviously I checked on her throughout) but the best rule is ding give in, stick to same time each night and once she's in bed she stays there (I moan at dh when he takes her out of bed) I give her a drink in bed but no communication. She now settles herself within 10 mins of being in her own bed and might wake once in the night for a drink as and is very thirsty.

It might seem hard to let him cry it out but they are not in pain so persist, it's the best thing I ever did

[daisydee43]

Also make sure he has protein in evening meal plus dessert as his less likely to wake if not hungry. I don't think the dummy is bad as has no teeth yet, I swear by it. Another tip, I got video baby monitor so you can see if they roll onto front. My dd sleeps on side, front and back. If I see she has rolled onto face I just flip her I over ...

[Iggly]

I would avoid tv for a young baby

There is a HUGE sleep regression around 9 months. Google it - loads will come up. Plus separation anxiety which makes sleeping very difficult. and a transition from 3 to 2 naps if they haven't already.

I would also make bedtime earlier. He probably cries because he's tired. Baths are not relaxing for babies, they're playtime in a brightly light room. So shift everything earlier - Tea at half 4, bath at half 5, feed then lights out for 6.15.

Why are you taking the dummy away and moving him out of your bed at the same time? Imagine if you had to learn to sleep without a pillow and in a different bed (for example) - it would be pretty hard going right? That's what you're doing to your baby. So keep the dummy until they're used to the cot. Cuddle him to sleep. Basically the idea is you're gradually getting him used to the cot first. Then you do self settling, then you remove dummy.

[Iggly]

Why do you roll her back daisy? If she's old and strong enough to roll back and forth, she should be fine?!

[justhayley]

Snap. DS is 81/2 months and we co sleep.although I really need to move him. He wakes up constantly and pulls at my kicks punches etc. I feel like I get beaten up every night. I only want to move him into the cot in the same room but it's birding on impossible. I hardly get any sleep as it is and when he's not in my bed get even less! Have no advice but your not alone, I'm in the same situation & will be keeping an eye on this thread

[Impatientwino]

I second keeping the dummy until he is used to the cot, one thing at a time.

My DS was much more settled on his side when he first went in to his cot so I used a rolled up small blanket in a sausage shape to put behind his back to keep him supported - I think you can buy something called a baby wedge which does this too - saw it on another thread...

[LaDenf]

Thank you all for the advice / comments

Iggly, yes that is the approach we are deciding to take. Keep things simple and take it slowly. Getting him used to the cot first then working on other things.

Daisydee; He gets a pretty rounded meal and he tends to eat a lot - some days he isnt keen, I am guessing it is due to teething and chewing probably hurts. We are doing a combination of jar and BLW. Primarily because he has taken to biting me during feeding and is very easily distracted trying to BF during the day. Purely BLW I dont think he would get enough to eat so we supplement that with jar/pouch. I sometimes think that his night feeds (usually at 10.30pm and 3am) are now habit but I am happy to do them for a bit longer as I like the idea he is still getting milk. It is just another thing to cut out at some point though