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someone please tell me this is normal after the birth of new sibling.....

(14 Posts)
Nicplus2 Wed 07-Sep-11 19:33:33

dd1 is 2.9 and dd2 is 6 weeks, dd1 has been out of nappies for approx 4 months with no accidents to speak of even in the 1st few weeks.

anyway the past week has been a nightmare without a day passing that she hasnt weed herself i wont even call them accidents as i dont beleive they are, she basically stands there and does it.

luckily none have been away from home so i cnt get my head around it sad
shes been so good, i dont know what to do shes supposed to be starting pre school next week but i dnt want to send her.

is this normal with arival of dd2??

twotesttickles Wed 07-Sep-11 19:49:49

Abso-sodding-lutely

Start a sticker chart. Lavish attention on your older child whenever you can. Wait six weeks, it will pass.

Nicplus2 Wed 07-Sep-11 20:11:57

Thank god lol, when you say start a sticker chart use it in what concept to reward good behaviour??

Have you experienced this?? Please say yes lol

moogalicious Wed 07-Sep-11 20:18:43

Yes it is normal and I have experienced it. What twotesttickles said, use sticker charts, bribes whatever you used when you potty trained her. Lots of positive attention.

Not sure that I would send to preschool just yet as she may feel you are pushing her away <voice of experience>, but that's just my opinion.

Again, it will pass.

You could be quoting a friend of mine who is going through exactly the same thing! They are back to the sticker charts, rewards etc. Good luck!

MatchsticksForMyEyes Wed 07-Sep-11 20:40:40

I had a similar age gap between my 2 and with DD it wasn't wetting herself it was hitting other children. She was, as is your DD, making sure she is getting some 1-1 attention and wetting herself ensures that. As others have said, it will pass. What may help is having 'girls time' with her. With my DD I get her to choose something to do together once DS is sleeping, even if for just 20 mins, e.g playdough, colouring, doing a puzzle. She now asks for girl time as part of her routine and it seems to be working. She is 3.9 now though.

Nicplus2 Wed 07-Sep-11 20:42:34

Its so nice to know im not on my own, i got myself really uspet about it today because i did smack her bum sad and really screamed at her and proceeded to drag her to the bathroom to ask her what the toilet was for! which i know achieves nothing but it was an instant reaction im afraid to say

moogalicious Wed 07-Sep-11 20:46:59

Don't worry, I remember shouting at my dd blush - it made things much worse.

Just tell her you're sorry for getting cross and that from now on there'll be no shouting if she has an 'accident'. Explain to her what will happen if she is dry all day.

moogalicious Wed 07-Sep-11 20:47:38

Btw, my dd is 9 - there's been no lasting damage!

ruletheworld Wed 07-Sep-11 20:48:08

Ah, bless you, that sounds touhgh!

If it's any consolation, my DD1 was only 22 months when her sister was born and wasn't yet potty trained so didn't regress in that area. However, after being an A star solid sleeper for 18 months she stated waking up at night and being up for hours! I'm sure it was an attention thing but DH and I felt so guilty about her new sibling that it took us 7 months to deal decisively with her night wakings.

In fact, we were still giving her the benefit of the doubt 7 months after DD2 was born until we moved house and were giving PIL a tour of the house and DD1 (then 2.5) marched them into her room and said "this is my room, this is where I muck about and get in and out of my bed shouting for Mummy and Daddy".

Definitely recommend a reward chart and lavish attention for your DD1! My DD1 has earned an entire set of Ben and Holly characters for staying in her bed at night and it's now no longer a problrm!

moogalicious Wed 07-Sep-11 20:50:39

My dd is 9 now smile

cottonreels Wed 07-Sep-11 21:01:22

No advice, am not there yet, but ruletheworld you just made me laugh out loud grin

ruletheworld Wed 07-Sep-11 21:05:22

grin cottonreels

Nicplus2 Wed 07-Sep-11 21:15:58

Lots of good advice here smile also making me feel better about the situation.

LOL @ ruletheworld

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