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Behaviour/development

Bath then feed or feed then bath- very confused.

15 replies

bettieblue · 04/06/2011 14:33

I posted on here a few days ago as I have a two week year old and was trying to follow Alison Scott Wright plan and the consensus seemed to be i should go with the flow and its was too early for a routine. I am trying.....difficult as im quite a control/routine sort of person. Anyhow I am keen to get a bedtime routine in place for his last day feed. I have read Scott Wright book and some of the baby Whisperer and one avocates bath then feed and the other feed than bath! What are peoples experiences and which do you think works best at this age?.

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acatcalledbob · 04/06/2011 14:45

I've always done bath then feed (even now with a 6 year old, she has a bath, then milk before bed).

I don't think I would be bathing a newborn every night though - their skin is so thin and sensitive. I would bath every 3rd day or so (in plain warm water) until they are a couple of months old. Do a good top and tail on other days.

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Hatespinkcantcook · 04/06/2011 14:48

I have always bathed then fed which has worked well as ds often settles and becomes drowsy while being fed. Don't worry too much about enforcing a routine you will probably find one evolves naturally. The most helpful thing I got from the baby whisper book was to watch for drowsy signs and put to bed before baby becomes too tired. Also using white noise saved my sanity in the early days x

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BertieBotts · 04/06/2011 15:00

I would go bath then feed. A bath takes a good chunk of time - you want to do the last feed as late as possible really, otherwise the first wake up is going to be earlier, surely?

If baby is really tired/hungry and you don't think they'll last the time it takes to bath them, then skip the bath that night.

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trixie123 · 04/06/2011 15:23

a newborn really shouldn't be bathed every day - their skin can't cope, but on the days you do do it, if you are still in the first few weeks, really I would say :
they wake up, early evening feed, leave it half hour, then bath, then they'll fall asleep again possiby after a very small top up feed. A bath takes very little time with a tiny one because they'll get cold if you dawdle too long and its not like you are washing hair and doing teeth. Once LO is a bit older, you can get more into a bedtime routine with a daily bath but always the very last thing before bed is milk. Its hard but there is no one right way so you won't get a definitive answer and also 2 weeks is very very young, don't panic about establishing a routine - they are too young to learn or remember or establish patterns of anything and you won't miss some "window" to do it. DS settled into a 4hr feed routine about 6 weeks which is fairly standard and once you get to that point you can start to get a bit of structure.

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bettieblue · 04/06/2011 17:25

Thanks, im not doing full bath every night but do a quick top/tail which I wanted to be part of the routine. I had read (i think in the Baby Whisperer) that it should be feed then bath as otherwise babies associate having a feed with sleeping and become dependent on the feed to go to sleep? There is so much conflicting info its really hard to know which to follow, im not sure I have this ' instinct' mothers are supposed to have!

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Tee2072 · 04/06/2011 17:41

My number one piece of advice for all new moms us: throw our the books. Go with your instincts.

Feeding to sleep. Bathing to sleep. Who cares? Which feels best for your baby?

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Hatespinkcantcook · 04/06/2011 19:50

Don't stress too much I was like you wanting it to be perfect frightened I would establish bad habits by mistake etc the best advice I got was relax, take each day as it comes and patterns emerge, I don't think there is an instinct as such I just think that by observing your baby you get to know what he or she wants or needs by their body language and cry etc

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clemetteattlee · 04/06/2011 19:57

Small feed about 30mins before bath, bath, then another feed.
Being fed to sleep feels blissful for a baby - most babies are fed to sleep, whatever the books say.
It is an overwhelming time you are going through and I know it helps to try and get a handle on it, but if you can ride out the first three months doing whatever works and makes you both as happy as you can be, then start thinking about these things after 12 weeks...

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gourd · 04/06/2011 20:17

Don't you just feed on demand? Our LO would enjoy a longer and more relaxing bath if she wasn't hungry, so I usually fed her a bit before the bath if she wanted it, otherwise she'd only want to get out of the bath after a few minutes for milk! We don't have a bath (only a baby bath), just a shower, so I couldn't bathe with her and feed her. She would then have some more milk after the bath, and fall asleep in my arms. Now she's 8.5 months she doesn't feed so often, so just has tea with us then a bath, then a milk feed before bed.

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sprinkles77 · 04/06/2011 20:51

I agree with clemetteattlee, feed then bath then feed again. I think this is what some people call cluster feeding, getting more milk in during the evening to help them sleep longer at night. My 15 month old still has his dinner, then a bath and a bottle before bed.

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tostaky · 05/06/2011 21:21

i feed them, they get dirty and then a big scrub and i find the warm water is great to calm them down (2 boys). then it is story time and off to bed!
works for us :-)

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tostaky · 05/06/2011 21:24

ps: i breastfed my babies to sleep, both of them, one was always a poor sleeper, the other a very good sleeper and they both dropped the last feed beore bedtime happily at 18 months. throw away the books, enjoy your little one and do what feels right for you!

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RitaMorgan · 05/06/2011 21:26

I bathed then fed to sleep, but not til later. At 2 weeks I just kept ds with me in the evenings and took him to bed when I went.

Babies are designed to feed to sleep, I wouldn't be fighting nature so early!

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colditz · 05/06/2011 21:27

I always did bath then feed, as a bath woke my babies up.

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colditz · 05/06/2011 21:28

darling most babies are fed to sleep, why is it a problem? Mine were both fed to sleep, it's so nice for them and they do sleep better for it. Do what you want, it's your baby

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