Name wobble, will it grow on me?(20 Posts)
Dc3 due in a few days and am having last min name wobble!
Dh LOVES alice. It's his first choice and he likes it miles better than anything else. I like it. I don't love it. It seems a bit plain to me and ordinary.
I LOVE philippa, with pippa for short. Dh really liked if too for quite a while until the bloody royal wedding when pippa Middleton got all popular and now dh thinks that she is so much in the public eye that we can't use the name as all everyone will think of when they hear it is pm!
Both our 2nd choice is Josephine, nn josie. Which is lovely but neither of us love it anywhere near as much as our first choices.
I'd pretty much resigned myself to agreeing to alice up till now, seeing as I got my first choice name last time with dc2, plus I thouht it would be nicer all round to have one of us have the name we really love rather than a 2nd choice compromise name.
I am worrying now that it won't grow on me and what if I don't get used to it after she is born?
Shall I make a last minute stand for philippa? (which I'm not sure will do any good tbh!) or compromise on Josephine? Or shall I stick to my resolution to let dh have the name he loves and make myself get used to alice???
Have you actually told dh you're not keen? If its dc3, then I'm guesing you've sorted out name issues before
Yes dh is aware that alice isn't my favourite, but he knows I do like it, just not as much as my other choices!
Dc1 we both found a name we agreed on very early on.
Dc2 we didn't agree at all and I ended up getting my name choice after going through labour!
This time it feels a bit as though it should be dhs turn to get his choice as I got mine last time iyswim
BUT I'm not sure I'll be as good at 'getting used' to a name I didn't choose as dh was with dc2. I tend to brood over things like this a bit more than he does!
I like Josephine best from your choices. Personally I think a compromise is nice to get a name you both like equally
Although I prefer Philippa, I think you should compromise and go with Josephine. A compromise is always the best way to go so neither of you ends up feeling a bit miffed that you didn't get to use your favourite name.
Maybe the fact that DH chose her name and that's why it's so special will grow on you, rather than the name itself.
I like Alice a lot. I don't like Phillipa or Pippa although my views may be coloured by a friend of DDs who stole her shoes and her mother denied it.
Why don't you ditch all three options and come up with something entirely different? That might be the best compromise of all.
I think you're gonna have to work this one out yourselves. If you get true deadlock and it's approaching the 42nd day fast then rolling a dice might have to be the final answer. You might just look at her when she's born and it all make sense then.
Josephine is so much nicer than either Alice (there are loads of them) or Phillipa/Pippa (agree re: Middleton). It is less common, classier, has better nicknames (Josie, but also Jo, Phi/Fee, Seffie etc) and is just so much prettier.
So, I vote Josephine (not that my vote counts .
we had similiar issues dh loved one name which i wasn't keen on , i loved another name which dh wasn't keen on we had one compromise name which we both liked but neither loved . in the end i went with dh's favourite , i wasn't prepared to give dd a name dh really didn't like as i could imagine the tension it could create .even though i didn't like dh's choice i really hoped it would grow on me as it was dd's name we used the other 2 names as middle names . unfortunately it didn't grow on me , every time i used it i felt like crying and it caused huge resentment between dh and i .in the end we changed her name to the compromise name ,her middle name , when she was 8 months old and have not looked back and we both now love it. i really wish we'd gone with the compromise name from day 1 it would have prevented so much heartache .
from experience i'd really advise you either try to find an alternative you both love , try the twin game ie this baby's called philippa alice whats her twin sister called or go with the compromise name which will in my experience be easier to grow to love as you will not feel you lost , he won or vice versa. she may arrive and look like a name you hadn't even considered .
fwiw all 3 names are lovely how about josephine philippa alice to keep everyone happy .
I would go for Josephine Alice - classy name, sounds good as a child and grown up, nice nick names.
Wow. DessertsinReverse you have almost told our exact story (we left it 'till 11 months and had to revisit the registry office).
I thought I was the only mad one, and my daughter the only one explaining such an unusual naming story!
I would stick with Alice if DH really likes it and you just 'don't love it'. If you really hated it and couldn't bear the thought of a child of yours having it, then it would be different, but doesn't sound like that's the case.
Personally I think Alice is the nicest anyway, I do like Pippa but not Phillipa so much. Josephine seems very old-fashioned and fussy and I struggle to imagine it for a little girl these days. Just my opinion though!
My DH came up with Ursula as a middle name and I wasn't at all sure at first, but when he explained it meant "little bear" and would remind us of the little bear we saw together one day in Japan, I had to go with his idea. It is a generous thing to do to let DH's have an input on names too, but I guess easier said than done !
When DD was born I kind of thought we could have gone with "April" in the mix somewhere as she arrived on April 1st, though due in March.
Also we heard blackbirds singing the night she was born, so "Myrtle" could have been a possibility. ( I think I'm right that blackbirds are sometimes known as this )
I guess I'm saying that if you're bold this time round you could wait till she's born and see if anything fortuitous happens around the time of the birth.
P.S I was taking part in a quiz with some teenagers last week and asked one of them what it was like being an "Ed" as that is our DS's name. He said it was fine ! His friend then said "Names don't matter !"
So, all our angst may be for nothing I guess
I like Josephine the best.
Like you, I was dissuaded from calling DD my favourite name because of something that came up at the last minute. We went for a compromise name but it never felt right for me, and we ended up changing her name to the favourite one after all.
If you love it, use it. It's a perfectly normal name, it's not so unusual that it will look like you've named her after La Middleton.
I love Alice and it was going to be dd's name with the nn Lissey but then the middle name I chose - which is a family name - was one I love but expected dh to turn his nose up. It never occured to me he'd let me have it as a first name - but he actually loves it more than me so Alice is now middle name. I like Pippa but not so keen on Philippa. I would have Philippa Alice or Alice Philippa on the table and decide once she's born.
PS. I named dd1 after dh felt he had no right once I'd gone through labour. This time it's twins so we needed more names. dh has been far more involved in names but I still have overall say. I think he's chuffed I've actually stuck with his choices. The 1st name I love, middle name is fine but I wouldn't have chosen it - don't mind it though, and like dh's involvement.
Josephine is SO much the best name of the three. Lots of great nicknames - Josie, Posie, Jo, Jo-Jo. Don't really like either of the others - just meh.
Go for Josephine Alice.
I agree - go with Josephine, it's a fab name!! Most unusual of the bunch too and lots of gorgeous nicknames. Alice is lovely too. (I don't like the name Philippa at all but that's just me)
Join the discussion
Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.Register now
Already registered with Mumsnet? Log in to leave your comment or alternatively, sign in with Facebook or Google.
Please login first.