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Cvs test

(4 Posts)
Sidniprince Sat 06-Apr-19 11:19:45

Hi I've just had cvs test at 15 wks as after my screening chances of downs has come back 1 in 8 chance, I have to now wait week for result and am going out of my mind what I will do if it's positive result, I have two ds who already keep me firmly on my toes, I am 39 and already very tired, just don't know what I & dh will do, please any advice will so be appreciated, I feel my dh would not cope, I can already see it in him, without him actually saying as he's trying to not say the wrong things. I also feel on my judgement day will I ever be forgiven if I was to end pregnancy, and any advice on this at 16 weeks the process as I've never had to through anything like this before. Thank you so much.

OP’s posts: |
Cannyhandleit Sat 06-Apr-19 11:33:13

So when I was pregnant with my first son our screening came back 1:5! I turned down further testing due to threatened miscarriage I just didn't want to risk it. Well my beautiful boy was born with Down's syndrome. I had worried I wouldn't be able to bond with him but as soon as I saw his perfect little face all the negative thought disappeared, and the same goes for my dp!We are very lucky as so far he hasn't really had any extra health issues so really our biggest hurdle is a delay in development but it really is t too much of a delay, he attends mainstream nursery (hes 4) and is very social! We have another son now and they are as thick as thieves! I won't lie and say it's all been plain sailing but it most definitely has not been the end of the world like I envisaged at that 12 weeks scan when we were told that downs was a possibility! You should really do some research on how having a family member with ds really positively effects the dynamic of a family. People have asked me in the past if I could take away his ds would I and I can honestly say I don't know that I would, he is loving, cheeky, hilarious and by far easier to deal with than his nt little brother who is a little fire cracker! I do hate that his speech is delayed and he struggles to communicate with us but I know that that will come eventually!
I do hope you get the result you want I really do but I hope that if you don't that maybe my story will have helped make the future a little less scary!

Sidniprince Sat 06-Apr-19 14:58:30

Many thanks for taking time to reply sounds like you have a lovely little family, part of me wishes I never went through that cvs test yesterday it was excruciating and know now why they call it evasive! But for us especially dh really needs to know before, and having that we have two ds to consider too we felt it was the right decision for us, but this waiting up until end of next week is just as painful especially as we have no firm answer as what we'll do, it's so painful for us both we're finding hard to even speak about it in complete detail, my dh is very supportive but very logical so is a one step at time person, I'm the emotional wreck who can't get a grip either way, i can't even speak with family as I really don't want their biased opinions, instead of facts and chatting to parents like yourself that have experience, anyway many thanks again we have so much to consider that I think I'll do what dh says and take one day at a time, wishing you all the best with lovely family, x

OP’s posts: |
Cannyhandleit Sat 06-Apr-19 16:43:54

Oh I know exactly how you are feeling right now, when we were told that our baby might have ds I didn't handle it very well! I couldn't talk about it, I couldn't even look at the scan picture! We did consider having an amino and if we had and had his diagnosis confirmed I cannot day with 100% certainty that I would have wanted to carry on with the pregnancy! I did not want a child with a disability, I felt like I had been cheated and my world crumpled! Now having my son I find it difficult to hear people have terminated due to Down's syndrome but at the same time I can fully understand how that decision is made! There really are some interesting facts and figure about how siblings feel their lives have been enriched by their sibling with ds and there is a very low divorce rate in families where there is a child with ds.
Whatever your decision is I'm sure you won't make it lightly and it will be what's best for your family! I wish I could send you a snap shot of how peoples faces light up when they meet our monkey!
If you do get a diagnosis of ds and decided to continue with the pregnancy there is a closed Facebook page called 'the future of downs' for parents/carers or people with ds and it's a very supportive group where you can ask questions and get honest answers!!
Good luck, my fingers are crossed you get the result you are looking for smile

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