depression

[RosemarieMaughan]

Hiya I'm new to this so not sure if am doing it right but I'm really struggling I lost 3 children within 3 years of each other I've got another 3 so I'm struggling I've tried everything to get help for my depression and it just seems it isn't working has anyone have/had depression could you tell me what helps them with it? X

[1t6y9o]

Lost as in miscarried? If so I strongly recommend you get tested for hypothyroidism as two of the main symptoms are miscarriage and depression.

If you are very low anti depressants are extremely helpful to allow you to feel well enough to make other changes...

Diet is very important. I highly recommend the book 'Mind of Your Own' by Kelly Brogan. She has a web site and Facebook page too. Poor gut health is strongly linked to depression. As is a low Vitamin D level. I know if I eat sugar and gluten I get depressed. If I eat plenty of good fat & protein, low carb etc I feel well. Sunshine, sleep and exercise are so important too.

Talking therapies & mindfulness/meditation are another avenue.

How are you feeling?
What have you been thinking?
Do you have any help with the kids?

[RosemarieMaughan]

No never lost them as miscarriage I lost them another way x I've tried literally everything 😔 no not getting any help with my other kids x I've been through alot so I've tried getting help the lot but it isn't working x

[1t6y9o]

Have you been to the GP recently? Taking medication?

You sound very low and really quite desperate.

[RosemarieMaughan]

no never been to gp I just dny no where to start 😔 it's getting me so down ive tried killing my self with it eh as I'm actually at my whits end with it I'm struggling so much with my other children

[1t6y9o]

I'd definitely visit the GP and tell them how you feel. It sounds like you need professional help and antidepressants would be a good start. Once you're more on an even keel you might be in a better place to sort other things in your life.

What do you think is making you so depressed? When you have the strength and energy you need to look at ways to change circumstances around you to lift your mood and make life better. Financial worries? Housing issues? Are you a single parent? Do you need a break from the children?

Have you ever had anti depressants? I'm a huge believer in alternative methods to treat depression but they all take time and effort. If you're in a black hole you need something to get you out of it quickly. They can and do work as a short term fix, then you can look at other options.

[RosemarieMaughan]

Ive got a load that been happening over the past 5 year so it's all that aswell as loosing my babys x and aye I'm a single parent but it's not that making me depress I'm trying my best for my kids but I just don't know anymore

[monty1212]

Hey, i have had bad depressions in past (way before my kid). I found all of it was linked to low self esteem and not being able to forgive myself any choices which led to circumstsnces in my life i didnt like. The issue has grown in my head by every day until i became suicidal. I didnt go to gp, but have decided i have to rewire myself and thats tough. You need to love yourself as you are and accept all thats happened and work on now. If you want any help / chat let me know.

[monty1212]

Find all the reasons why to be happy, why to smile. If you dont see the reasons for smile just fake it. Just smile in the mirror as a decision to change it. Fake it until you make it. Try picking small stories of happiness. (Even as small as wow the sun is out!)

[PurpleSky17]

Hello. I just really need to share my thoughts! This year has been a tough year it should of been the best year of my life but my life but apparently not :( I got with my wonderful boyfriend at the start of Feb last year (there was a lot of stress caused by my ex and debts he wouldn't help with which my new bf helped with) but my bf stuck with me through it and at the start of April I became pregnant with my little boy (I have a 6 year old already and he has a 2 year old) my daughter started making things very difficult basically straight away when getting with my bf, e.g not listening, just playing up all the time. (I understand that's probably due to the change) we moved in with his mum and dad a few months into my pregnancy, it was only ment to be for a few months ended up being a year (the worst time of my life) I don't open up to people easily and I'm not a very talkative person and his mum used to make a massive deal and be funny with me ect which made things harder because my daughter was playing up everyday, I was pregnant and I only had a little room in a 3 bed house to have time to myself (which his mum would just walk in at anytime even if I was getting changed and would still do whatever she came in there for) she still had stuff of hers in the cupboard. I had to bite my tounge and literally home everything in! We've moved out now and can barely afford to live, we have enough money for bills and that's it. Everything I have is basically second hand or stuff I've had for years, I lose my temper everyday, I winge everyday about how much I hate my life and that I don't want to be here anymore. I'm the total opposite to the girl I used to be, my house is always a mess, I only get dressed if I'm going out, I don't do my make up anymore. Me and my bf never argue untill recently because of all the stress, sometimes I just tell him to leave me because I'm just not loveable at all right now. That's just half of it, I really don't know what to do anymore, I find myself saying every single day I can't do this anymore and I'm scared I actually might end my life.

[Jess87]

hi purple sky. this is only my second post on here but wanted to reply because you sounds at your wits end which is totally understandable! Firstly you CAN do this, you're doing it right now- you have 3 children which i imagine is seriously exhausting- (I get exhausted with just my 7 month old) being a mum is one serious underrated accomplishment. I like a quote which says so far you've survived 100% of your worst days. When you think you can't cope, you have. You are a survivor hun. To 3 little people you are their world- please don't ever end your life. I've had those feelings, I've felt worthless but life does get better I promise. If your at rock bottom you can only go up. Is there anyone around that can help look after them for a couple of hours so you can have a breather? Do you know any mums in the week you can meet up with or just message? Mush is a good app for that. Your bfs mum sounds like a bit of a nightmare! I know it's a cliche but think of the positives of life right now- 2 1.you've got your own place. It may be stressful with no money but i bet its a hell if a lot better than living with her! 2. Your bf is with you- you are not unlovable you are just telling yourself that as you are in a dark place. You are still you and will be again once you get better. 3. You have 3 children, they may drive you mad but I'm pretty sure will bring you happy moments in the future too! I've found making myself put make up even when I know I'm not going out or seeing anyone makes me a feel just a tiny better. Please go to the drs too hun. Sending lots of positive thoughts x