Hi all
I had PND with both DC (was on ADs for 6 months with DS (20 months) but not DD, who is 4.5). My PIL are nice people but utterly clueless (eg apparently I have nothing to be depressed about and I should just have been grateful for what I have. Hmm, like it's that easy). Since having DS, PIL have repeatedly said they think we shouldn't have any more DC as I "can't cope". Actually, I can. I was sick and I got medical and practical help. Not from PIL, mind you (which is fine, that's their choice, but my point is that it's not like I've ruined their lives by imposing on them).
I'm now pg with DC3. DH has made a few comments about me "not coping" third time round esp as my due date is around his busiest time of year, so after paternity leave he will be working long hours. I've pointed out that I feel really judged by his choice of words, and that PND does not equal not coping- it's an illness.
I'm apprehensive of telling PIL about this baby - I really don't want to hear about how I won't be able to cope, so I've told DH he has to tell them by himself and also that they have to button it.
I spoke to a friend who pointed out that most new mums struggle with a newborn- they're lovely but hard work and that it does pass.
I guess I feel pretty vulnerable about all this. My family are chuff all use by way of support, so it's a matter of me looking after myself.
Anyone got any words of wisdom for when people say having PND means you can't cope?
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Antenatal/postnatal depression
Postnatal depression vs "not coping"
28 replies
Apparentlychilled · 10/06/2013 10:17
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