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AIBU?

To want to burst into tears...

12 replies

Bathsheba · 07/11/2009 13:43

I'm probably being pathetic but I just want to cry...I'll bullet point it to try and stop this being incredibly long.

  • I'm 29 weeks PG.
  • I was very ill a few weeks ago with this saga and I'm struggling to recover fully meaning I'm still really tired.
  • I'm anaemic and on iron tablets.
  • My DH came back last night from being abroad with his work all week meaning I was looking after DD1 (aged 5) and DD2 (aged 3) all week myself.
  • DH has just been dropped off at the pub with his mates to go to the football leaving me with DD1 and DD2 until 6pm when we collect him again from the pub.
  • As he is at the football, I'm NOT at my NCT sales team meeting where I get to spend some time with my friends.
  • I've been nagged about the finances since I got up (including what I presume was a joke about me getting a job now), as well as it being mentioned that in the week he has been gone I've not made enough inroads into either clearing the garage or potty training DD2.
  • DH did take the girls out this morning for a couple of hours to the beach to build sandcastles leaving me alone for a couple of hours to have a shower in peace and read my book.


I Honestly just want to cry. I'm sick of hearing from my Mum and my friends "you are overdoing it" which I KNOW but what other option is there...I have to look after the girls - they need fed and entertained and bathed and cleaned up after and things - I can't just stop doing those things because I've not been well and I'm exhausted.

I've got a film lined up for them to watch for a wee while this afternoon while I have a rest but its not ideal and I certainly can't just entertain them like that for the next 5 hours until DH is back from the pub.

I know I'm really hormonal but I suspect everyone is sick to the back teeth of hearing how tired I am - I certainly have the feeling from DH that he is now just dismissing that as "just what Bathsheba says all the time". I know he hs rights to go out to the football and to be with his friends, esp after a hard week at work and having to miss the last game because we were all ill, but I just think he could go out with a bit more consideration and grace and acknowledgement that I have to therefore not do things I want to do so that he can do things that he wants to do.
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fandango75 · 07/11/2009 13:47

sounds like an idiot your DH poor you

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Meglet · 07/11/2009 13:51

you're not being hormonal, your DH is being an arse .

Can you get your DH back from the pub, to spend time with his family? Or if he won't then can your mum / friends come round or can you sod the expense and bugger off somewhere family friendly and get something nice to eat / go to the park etc? If he won't come back then you need to have a talk with him about his responsibilities.

There will be another child in the house soon so he needs to help you more.

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Bathsheba · 07/11/2009 21:12

Well, just a wee update - spent a large part of the day in tears, the rest watching films with the girls and Dh is now passed out snoring on the sofa.

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nattiecake · 07/11/2009 21:14

sneakily put dried peas up his nose while he sleeps and when he wakes up tell him how he thought snorting them was a great idea when he was drunk

it'll make you feel better, even if it doesnt solve anything
x

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seaglass · 07/11/2009 21:14

Oh
Can't give you hugs cos this is MN, but I hope things will get better for you.

Oh sod it (((((hugs))))

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PeedOffWithNits · 07/11/2009 21:15

your DH needs to pull his weight more

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Bathsheba · 07/11/2009 21:23

Oh, and pretty much the only convesation since he got back centred on how much of a "twat" one of the guys he goes to the pub with is.

Thats what I mean, he can't even do it with good grace and be grateful.

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HerBoomWhizzBangitude · 07/11/2009 21:27

oh ffs your dh does not have a right to go to football when you are 29 weeks pregnant and trying ot look after 2 other chldren.

What about your rights? What about your DD's rights to have a mother who feels cherished and looked after?

Your DH sounds like a bloody selfish git tbh.

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prettyfly1 · 07/11/2009 21:28

Your dh is being a twat. If its any consolation your not the only one feeling the way you do right now. I am 35 and a half weeks - I cant sodding move my hips hurt so bad, I have been in hospital all week with dehydration and exhaustion after doing too much and I am still at work for two weeks (at three jobs) with a three year old to look after and get to school, bath etc and my dp wanted to know if I was doing the family meal yesterday and if he could go the erotica show in london in two weeks.

Its hard work and you are allowed to feel tired - your dh sounds like a prat. You shouldnt even be cleaning out the garage. Tell him to do it himself, and if he really cant understand why strap six bags of sugar to his stomach and give him food poisoning - see how much he enjoys doing it then.

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lindsaygii · 07/11/2009 22:57

Take a leaf out of his book. When he gets home from work put your coat on and go out. If he wants to know where you're going, tell him. As you leave.

Also, do it on a night he had planned to go out somewhere.

He might start to get it after you've done it a few times...

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howmuchdidyousay · 08/11/2009 09:35

Did you TELL him how you are feeling and that you didn't want him to go. You have to be very explicit with men.

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almostreal · 08/11/2009 10:59

Poor you, your husband sounds like a pig, you really need to read him the riot act or he is going to continue to treat you like this.

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