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AIBU?

TO have called police over neighbours domestic?

9 replies

Squiglet · 17/10/2009 21:39

Title says it all really I know he;s been violent before. Was very frightening to hear and my ds1 was scared. Dp ended up popping around to check all ok (huge amounts of banging and shouting). The dog they were looking after then escaped to dp wen tto try and retrieve it. I spoke to the woman (very nice lady, has been having problems with her b/friend). She's very upset and incoherent almost (lloks terrified) she has 3 year old ds on her hip and her 4 year old dd next to her. THey are sobbing and crying. Say she can come over now but she said it was ok, offered to have kids but hse said no. (Had kids for tea last week for same reason, and she came over as well a bit later). Her partner said he wanted a word with her upstairs. He was very agressive, i said if this happened again i would likely call police. He went mental. He was shouting at us it was none of our business and dp said it is when it upsets our kids. At which point he tried to attack dp. I offered her a safe place again and we left pronto and called police. While i was on phone he knocked on door apologising.

THis isnt the first time, it has been getting worse and worse. He has been violent towards her. Now starting to say that the kids wind him up. It is very firightening to hear so god knows what it must be like living there. He is a young lad and also not kids father (only been with her since Feb). Her ex and her split because her ex was violent too.

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WickedWench · 17/10/2009 21:43

No, you did absolutely the right thing. How awful!

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colditz · 17/10/2009 21:45

Do call the police, and keep calling them if it keeps happening

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Squiglet · 17/10/2009 21:45

Still shakey as feel so much for her kids in that situation and her of course. Just hope i havent 'interfered' in a way she wont be ableto seek help here if and when she needs it. Paranoid of the repercussions.

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Squiglet · 17/10/2009 21:46

colditz - have called police, was on phone to them when he came around apologising. They've taken it very seriously.

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colditz · 17/10/2009 21:47

the repercussions will probably be that the social services will contact her about the 'domestic violence incident' - and that this might give her the shove she clearly needs to shift the worthless cunt.

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Heated · 17/10/2009 21:48

Thank goodness for neighbours who care enough to act and to offer practical help. Hope the police will be equally good.

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Meglet · 17/10/2009 21:48

yanbu. Drop him right in it. Please let them know he has been mouthy to you.

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Jux · 17/10/2009 21:54

She sounds like she needs someone to take the obvious step for her; she's completely cowed by her bloke (and her ex bloke has got her used to being like that). She does need a kick up the arse, but it's likely you'll be calling the cops quite often.

Don't hesitate. You're doing the right thing. You're like a guardian angel, aren't you? She's lucky you're there, though it may be some time before she admits it.

Good on you.

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Squiglet · 17/10/2009 22:02

It is a hard place to be because we usually walk up the school together and her little boy plays with mine. She really is a very very nice person and very patient with her children. Also she has said she's had enough and that it wasnt going to work. I know he's had some heavy things to deal with but it is no excuse imo. I've seen bruises on her, he doesnt 'hit' her, he 'shoves' her.. no difference in my opinion. Also puts fist through doors, pulls shelves off walls. When her nephew (under 2) slammed a door, he then repeatedly slammed the door (lots) to prove a point ?!? She feels she can talk to me as i try not a be judgey and telling her what to do. I try and listen and ask her questions, like 'how her kids might be feeling'. I hope this is the kick up the bum she needs. He is so very controlling and i wonder how he's going to react to all this... blame me in part most likely. He blames her for his temper (she makes him to it). He is now saying the kids 'wind him up'... He is a twat

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