To put a polite note through the door of the tenants upstairs

[estuaryfairy]

asking them to be a little more considerate when using the stairs and the doors, particularly as I have a baby? They moved in about a month ago and appear to spend their time running up and down the stairs in big boots and slamming doors, day and night. The previous people never managed to make that much noise. I think a polite note is reasonable, particularly as I really want to tell them what ignorant twunts they are, or AIBU?

[Lio]

Better to talk to them if poss, IMO.

[VinegARGHHHTits]

Does the baby wake up when they do it? or does it just annoy you? i have no advice really, my neighbour drives up to her house with her music blasting very loud late at night (i turn my down if i am approaching the house) it doesnt wake my ds (he would sleep through an earthquake) but it does annoy me, i wont say anything to her though unless it starts to wake ds.

[Nighbynight]

Agree, talk if possible. Letters are more likely to wind them up, and can be ignored more easily.
Or if you have a residents committee, suggest house rules like semi-quiet after 8pm, total quiet after 10 pm, without naming names.
If its just the 2 of you, then I would try requesting semi-quiet after 8, as that's your LO's bedtime.

[Nighbynight]

(or something like that)

[MadameOvary]

Oh god this would drive me nuts too. Try and talk to them tho. Better that they see you as a person rather than annoying neighbour who puts notes through doors. Whether it wakes your LO up or not, say that it does, then you dont sound like your BU.

[georgiemum]

If they are new, just talk to them and say that they probably don't realise how much noise travels in the block. Be nice and friendly.

Then if they don't, you can go to plan B (posting stinky prawns throught the letterbox when they are away for the weekend).

[SixSpotBonfire]

Definitely talk to them face to face as they may well not realise how much the sound travels.

[youknownothingofthecrunch]

We were really good friends with our downstairs neighbours and they had the same problem with us. Sounds that are quiet upstairs are echoed and amplified through the floors. They never heard me or the dcs, only my dh (who has elephant feet), but he couldn't change the way he walked so he tried not to wear shoes in the flat. Funnily enough we could here every light pull they turned on really loudly - especially if they went to the loo in the middle of the night. I made them stand upstairs once to hear it - they couldn't believe how noisy it was and I couldn't believe how quiet

You will hear the people upstairs in a flat. There's no escaping it. We're not talking about music or shouting, just walking and closing doors (which can be loud, but you can't ask them to stop).

Approach them by all means, but don't be surprised if they have some complaints about your noise too.

[youknownothingofthecrunch]

hear

[estuaryfairy]

I never see them, just hear them. I don't want to knock on their door though.

[Nighbynight]

why not?
they are neighbours, so might be a good idea to know them a bit.

[estuaryfairy]

I mean I don't want to knock on their door and complain about the noise, seeing as I haven't knocked on their door before.

[youknownothingofthecrunch]

You don't have to talk about it the first time you talk. Just welcome them to the building

[onager]

It's tricky isn't it. I hope my neighbours are not disturbed by me when I get up in the night (which is a lot as I'm an insomniac) but I couldn't do anything about it if they did mention it. I'd just feel uncomfortable from then on.

I wouldn't be nasty if they asked though and if there was something I could do I would. On the other hand in two places I've lived before confronting the neighbours would have been dangerous.

[onager]

Youknownothingofthecrunch, I think that's the perfect plan. It may take longer that way, but estuaryfairy can mention the noise another time in passing.

[estuaryfairy]

We'll they've been here about a month, so that would be weird! Think I'll just have to wait until I bump into them and say something then, (though it'll all come out wrong and I'll end up sounding like a loon)

[youknownothingofthecrunch]

A month is not long - just say you were giving them time to settle in, you're sorry you didn't come up earlier and give them a cheap bottle of plonk to welcome them. Then if it's awkward just run away

That way you have met them, introduced yourself and given them a generous first impression of you. (I'm always much more accomodating for people I like )

[estuaryfairy]

youknownothingofthecrunch I'm not wasting my cheap plonk of those noisy feckers! Am sure our paths will cross soon, there's only me and DD downstairs and them upstairs. In fact, the stomper/slammer isn't even the tenant, it's the tenant's boyfriend. Do you think if I tell her he regularly pops into her flat during the day for a poo when she's at work, she'll dump him??

[youknownothingofthecrunch]

He sounds like a charmer.

[estuaryfairy]

Not that I spend my days monitoring his comings and, er, goings, you understand, but if DD is napping, I'll be studying, so it's quiet enough in our flat to hear him stomp in, silence for ten or so minutes, then a flush and him stomping back out (yes, I am very easily distracted from my studies).

[BarbieLovesKen]

LOL!!. (ten minutes? think he should see a doctor)

[notsoteenagemum]

Beware- I nicely asked my new neighbours to stop banging the doors and running up and down the stairs, they said ok if you stop having sex!
needless to sy I scurried away and have kept my gob shut ever since.