AIBU not to call her boss? (A parking one)

[GreyPaw]

I live on a smallholding-type place which has two drives. It’s really useful to have both of them as sometimes the one I usually use (Drive B) is blocked so I use the main drive (Drive A). Also visitors often use Drive A.

A few years ago I sold a piece of land to someone who uses it to graze their horses. As part of the sale I gave the owner right-of-way access over Drive A. The drive goes over quite a chunk of my garden. The person I sold it to has a groom who goes to look after the horses every day.

Before Lockdown it seems that the groom (and anyone else who was with her) would park more-or-less wherever they wanted to along Drive A, which I didn’t know about as I was out at work. Being the easy-going type, I don’t really care about this as it didn’t affect me. They’d usually park on this little section just off the drive (ie in my front garden) and walk the rest of the way to their land, or they’d leave their cars blocking the entire drive which worked out ok as no one else was using it because people coming to the house use Drive B.

Since Lockdown this has become a bit annoying as I am here all the time and trying to enjoy my garden with a bit of privacy. It started to come to a head a few weeks ago when DP tried to go out via Drive A and found that the groom had parked her car blocking the way and he couldn’t get out. When he asked her to move she huffed and said “well there IS another drive you can use, you know”.

Last week I was having friends over and for various reasons they needed to use Drive A. I called the groom and said ‘I know you’re used to parking there and up till now it’s been ok, but from now on when you’re going to your land you need to actually park ON your land and not in my garden as I don’t want the drive blocked and also I don’t want cars parked in the garden anymore’. She said this was fine and that she was leaving in the next two weeks anyway as she’d got another job. All good.

The next day I went up there and found not one but TWO cars parked on the bit I’d just asked her to keep clear. It was her and her friend who had gone out for a ride.

I just asked DP to help me put some logs and stuff to block the bit where she parks so that a) she can’t park there anymore and b) the next groom doesn’t get the same idea. DP, however, wants to call her boss who owns the land to complain. I don’t think it’s worth calling anyway as she’ll be gone in the next couple of weeks. I figure I’ve asked nicely, she’s not paying attention, so I’ll physically block off the part where she parks. DP however thinks she might just end up leaving her car in the middle of the drive instead.

AIBU to just quietly block off the bit where she parks, or would you call her boss and make more of a fuss?

(Diagram to follow...)

[wink1970]

Wait until she has gone, then call the boss to chat about how the new groom will use your drive. You can control from a perspective of 'rules set' then.

[billy1966]

You asked.
You were ignored.
I agree with your husband.
Make it crystal clear to the owner that your drive is NOT a parking lot, and is not to be used as such going forward.

I think by tolerating this you have been setting a silly precedent.

Put a sign up if necessary.

[GreyPaw]

Diagram attached. Red crosses is where she will sometimes park (blocking the whole drive). Little red car is where she usually parks just off the drive in my garden.

[TestingTestingWonTooFree]

Can’t see your diagram

[ivykaty44]

Just call the boss and explain that the new groom needs to park on their land and not on your garden etc and itd be great if they can make it clear at the start

[R2519]

Put your cars there to stop them from parking or put a barricade infront of 1 drive and use the other.

[CourtneyLurve]

Call her boss. Today. You've given clear instructions that she's purposely ignored. Don't give yourself more work or aggro.

[WhentheRabbitsWentWild]

No diagram to see

[RHRA]

@GreyPaw
Could you try attaching the diagram again please?

[WarmSausageTea]

Call her boss. Today. You've given clear instructions that she's purposely ignored. Don't give yourself more work or aggro.

I agree with this. It puts down a clear marker for how things must be when the new groom starts, and (assuming the boss speaks to them), the current groom has their CF behaviour further challenged.

[BrightYellowDaffodil]

You've asked nicely, with an explanation as to why it's an issue, and been ignored. I'd absolutely be raising it with her boss - you don't have to go in all guns blazing, but just explain what's happened and ask them to ensure that visitors only park on their land.

Backstop is that right-of-access probably allows them to travel over the access land but not stop on it.

[NaturalBornWoman]

Presumably in order to sell the land you had to agree a right of access as there is no other way for them to access the land? And presumably there was a legal easement granted, giving the right to cross your land in this specific place in order to gain access to their land? If they are breaking the terms of the easement I don’t understand why you wouldn’t contact the new landowner and tell them? They have no right to park on your land, you don’t want them to do it, so write to the landowner and say so.

[custardbear]

Just be nice to the boss person and explain your land is being parked in so can she or he explain to the new groom about parking - perhaps even put a sign up saying 'parking' and 'no parking ' to corden odd the areas for their parking

[wowfudge]

I'd put a note under the windscreen wiper reiterating there's to be no parking on the drive as discussed. Then speak to her boss and say you let the parking go as long as she wasn't causing an obstruction, but now she's told you she's leaving she seems to think she can do as she pleases which isn't the case. Politely request that whoever takes over as groom is advised not to park there. Get some no parking notices too.

[sunshinesupermum]

Call her boss. The groom is being unreasonable.

[DameFanny]

Call the boss - the groom's being deliberately provocative after you had a word with her, who knows what she'll do if she gets away with this?

[TheFlis12345]

Groom is being rude, unreasonable, and deliberately inconveniencing you. Don’t let her get away with it, ring their boss (or block them in and tell them you can’t move your cars as you have been drinking, they will have to come back tomorrow ).

[DDiva]

I wouldnt bother with the groom again, it didn't work the first time. Call the land owner and ask them to remind the groom and inform the new groom that the drive is access only and where they are entitled to park.

[Noodledoodledoo]

Im with the calling and saying you have asked and been ignored. I would call everyday she does it till she leaves - do you know for sure she is?

Also it will ensure the new groom knows full well this is not an option. Personally I would go out when new groom arrives and make it clear the drive is access only and no parking. We have a spot near us that is no parking but the house has been let for the past 6 years and every time we get new tennants we go over to tell them! Nip it in the bud early!

[MaggieFS]

Why would you put yourself out by blocking it off before talking to the boss? Even if you frame it as 'I've already asked and been ignored, please can you ensure the new groom is aware', I'd get on the phone straight away. It doesn't need to be passive aggressive, just factual.

[Hopoindown31]

Right if access doesn't mean you get to block that access. Call the boss and get it set straight.

[Blobby10]

GreyPaw haven't anything useful to add other than I LOVE your diagram

[andweallsingalong]

Definitely call her boss, now, she's the one you have a contract with. She needs to sort it.

[AriadnesFilament]

I agree with your husband.

It needs to be reinforced with the land owner ASAP.

[TARSCOUT]

Where is the parking for the land?