Why am I never satisfied with how my house looks?

[Boredbumhead]

I live in a lived in early 1900s stone house. The location is great. However I'm always bugged by it feeling unfinished. DH is pretty bad at DIY and after he has meddled with things they look worse than before he started. I always notice the imperfections in my house which stops me relaxing (but I don't have the energy to tackle them either. Shall I just blitz things until I'm happy of turn a blind eye on the walls that need a repaint or the slightly overgrown garden? I'm working during lockdown and my energy is limited as I'm looking after young kids. Ignore imperfections -YABU. Blitz the house systematically YANBU.

[UnicornAndSparkles]

Sort what you can see and easily do; I always make sure the living area looks half decent so i can relax when DD goes to bed. Other than that my house is full of bodge jobs, like the wonky grouting my DH did this morning to "fix" a leak. I just overlook it; we're both exhausted with work and parenting a very lively 2yr old 24/7. When we have enough in savings we will either move or get someone in to repaint and fix all the little bits whilst we go to a spa! Until then, as long as its clean and semi ok (until you look closely) I'm prepared to turn a blind eye

[Boredbumhead]

When we have enough in savings we will either move or get someone in to repaint and fix all the little bits whilst we go to a spa! Until then, as long as its clean and semi ok (until you look closely) I'm prepared to turn a blind eye

I like your philosophy!
Part of my comparison comes because the people before us had no kids and pets and had the place perfect. No point comparing I guess!!

[SandysMam]

I find with small kids, it takes all your energy just to get back to zero, never mind anything else! So day to day washing, wiping surfaces, keeping floors clean enough take most energy, then add on top cleaning up toys and there’s just no time to actually improve anything. We have so much to do on our house.
My worst sound in the world is the sound of the Lego or the mega blocks being tipped out, picking them all up again is the most pointless task in the whole of parenting!!

[Boredbumhead]

I find with small kids, it takes all your energy just to get back to zero, never mind anything else! Yes exactly this!

[Knittedfairies]

@SandysMam - you need one of these

[ViciousJackdaw]

Houses are never really 'finished' though, are they? There is always something that needs doing. The pursuit of perfection is pointless, it just leads to unhappiness. Are you warm, clean, safe and comfortable? If so, you really do have more than millions of people in this country. Everything will get done in time, why keep winding yourself up about things that are really quite insignificant.

[1Morewineplease]

You say that your OH is bad at DIY, could you do it? Maybe he could look after the children while you crack on.
Maybe employ a handyman/woman?

[Boredbumhead]

Houses are never really 'finished' though, are they? There is always something that needs doing. The pursuit of perfection is pointless, it just leads to unhappiness. Are you warm, clean, safe and comfortable? If so, you really do have more than millions of people in this country

Very true. Houses are never finished. I think I've been sucked in by the ideal homes culture.

[skylarkdescending]

I think I understand your feeling of being unable to relax OP. I am similar in that if I can see jobs that need doing or things to tidy I can't fully let go. But if I kept on tidying/cleaning I wouldn't sit down til bedtime (toddler and baby here).

I try to focus on keeping the lounge clear and tidy (all toys shoved in the playroom at the end of the day even if not super tidy) then at least I can sit down after dinner and not look at mess.

I find I'm more active and productive early in the day so try and get tidying etc done before breakfast.

Stop DP doing DIY if he's bad at it! Do it yourself or get someone in! No point making things worse than they are now.