in making DH work today instead of going to yet another classic car event?

[macmama73]

We decided yesterday that DH would work today so that he could catch up on his backlog. Tomorrow we were to have a family outing to a open day at a mine, with biiig diggers and bouncy castles, so basically something for the DCs.

This morning, hadn't even really opened my eyes, DH said, Ok, change of plans. He wanted to go to a classic car race today. Tomorrow the mine, as planned.

By the time I came downstairs for breakfast, he already had his shoes on and was ready to go. I huffed a bit and he asked if I wanted to go with him (have done this before, there is a Centerparcs not far away and I have taken the DCs there for the day) And he would work tomorrow.

I asked what about the mine tomorrow. He said, just take them to the viewing point to see the diggers, they are not going to notice that they are missing all the kids attraction. There is no way I am doing that, DS might not notice, but DD certainly would, we have talked about it.

The problem is, he hasn't got home before 8pm this past week and he has loads of work to catch up on. If he doesn't work today, then he will be grumpy all next week because he is still behind.

We are getting visitors next weekend so he can't put it off till then. This would mean him being chained to his desk every day this week till late.

When I said this to him he grumped a bit then agreed not to go. He was looking really pissed off though, and now I am sitting here feeling guilty that I spoilt his fun.

Well done if you are still reading! What is the MN verdict, AIBU?

[NineUnlikelyTales]

Blimey don't feel guilty. Of course he should work.

[LoveMyGirls]

No YANBU he is a grown man and should accept he can not go off on his jollys for the day when it puts more pressure on his partner and children and also he wants to go off having fun for the day at the cost of his children having less fun tomorrow?!

Stick to your guns!

[macmama73]

Thanks for your replies, it makes me feel better.

OK, so he is working and grumping about it, his computer is still not working properly. He is now thinking about going this afternoon.

He thinks that it is not unreasonable to go to an occasional car thing. I think that if it is something the kids will enjoy, fine we will do that. DS loves going with him, DD said recently, "Papa, you know I don't like cars". Some car shows have lots for the kids to do and we all enjoy them. But obviously, you can't spend as long there when you have DCs.

I shouldn't complain really, he is lovely most of the time but today I am not giving in!

[macmama73]

Ok, now I am royally pissed off!

He has just left. I was intending going shopping while DS sleeps, now I will have to take both DCs with me. Nightmare!

He knows how I feel, he knows that I am upset and still he left.

I don't get it. Why does he not want to spend the time with his family.

[macmama73]

Right, DH home at last. Still annoyed with him though.

I took the kids into the town and we had pizza. Damned if I was cooking tonight. He can just search the fridge if he is hungry.

I have decided that the next time he can at least take DS with him and I will have a girly day with DD.

[QueenBhannae]

Oh Macmama,

I totally sympathise with the clasiic car widow thing. My dh restores them Its one thing to have a hobby but another to eat into family time.
I make him take the 2 dc with him now-dd loves the auto jumbles and ds is too small to care if he is there or not and is quite happy if he spots 1 dog on his day out lol!
My dh is self employed and I hate to nag him to catch up on things but sometimes he needs a nudge.
Have a great day at the mine tomorrow

[dazedandconfunded]

I hope you went out by yourlelf today!

[macmama73]

Thanks for your support. We actually had a lovely day today and are back on speaking terms.

Queenbhannae
Thankfully he doesnt want to restore classic cars, just look at them. Id never see him if he had a ruin in the garage to sort out.
DS loves going with him, DD is bored after 2 mins.