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That DP's tattoo has made me anxious

(11 Posts)
pepinananoo Fri 22-Mar-19 22:28:23

DH got a new tattoo today. I really like the artwork he has. It's all personal, meaningful and carried out by excellent artists at the top of their craft. He doesn't really go out and works hard for us as a family so don't begrudge him the cost etc. I don't have any myself and never would, but admire the work that goes into them.

He went today and I expected him to come back with something in particular. But he's come back with something completely different as the original image placement wasn't working.

It's too outing to say specifically what but it's connected deeply to me and my family (parents side) - think like a dragon on the welsh flag etc. There's no other connection to this specific symbol to him other than my parentage.

While I'm really touched I'm also a bit anxious about it. It was a bit of a surprise and it's something that is, effectively, almost like having my name tattooed on him. Something I made him swore he'd never do as it feels like a jinx.

Our relationship is strong and I can't, at least at this point in time, see us ever splitting up. But this has freaked me out slightly. I feel like by doing that it's doomed us somehow. Daft I know but you always see it with things like tattoos etc.

I don't think it was meant as a big grand romantic gesture but more a nod to our family being connected but it's really left me feeling so uneasy.

AIBU? I'm not going to say anything to him because... it's permanent, it's his body, he's an adult and the sentiment is lovely. I just really feel anxious now! blush

Haworthia Fri 22-Mar-19 22:31:02

I get what you’re saying. People always joke that getting your partner’s name tattooed is the kiss of death to a relationship... BUT think about it logically. It really isn’t. And it’s not even your name grin

multiplemum3 Fri 22-Mar-19 22:32:58

Well if it's not your name it's not a big deal, me and my other half were drunk in Benidorm and got eachothers initial tattooed and we're still together years later. I'm aware of how classy that sounds lol.

ShaggyRug Fri 22-Mar-19 22:35:09

Do you have DC together? I only ask as if so then it’s a bid to his children’s heritage on their mothers side. Not your heritage directly. So he’d always be connected to his children. No jinx possible there. Look at it that way maybe if you have children.

ShaggyRug Fri 22-Mar-19 22:35:46

*nod not bid

pepinananoo Fri 22-Mar-19 22:38:21

Yes @ShaggyRug we do and he has tattoos for them as well (he has their names in fact). That's a good way of looking at it I guess. You'd think marriage, mortgage and kids should feel more "scary permanent" bit this freaks me out? He has another symbolic tattoo for us but it's a lot less specific so that's always been fine. This is soooo specific, though thinking about it it's probably just because it's something so personal to me.

pepinananoo Fri 22-Mar-19 22:38:47


Shootfirstaskquestionslater Fri 22-Mar-19 22:43:56

I’m getting a tattoo for me and my DF it will have our names on the date we met and a quote that means something to us as a couple I don’t see it as a jinx. My parents know i’m getting it and my mum would be the first person to say something if she thought it was a bad idea. He’s not done it to cause you anxiety over it he’s done it as a celebration of you and your family.

pepinananoo Fri 22-Mar-19 22:50:55

You're right. I'm being so silly really. It's a really lovely tattoo as well. Some of the work he's had is jaw-dropping and to think it's been done with just a needle and ink is madness.

TheFormidableMrsC Fri 22-Mar-19 23:13:57

I don't do tats, it's not my thing, but did once have a discussion with ex-DH about us both having one that was interconnecting as it were...he told me to get lost, he hated tats, only skanks have tats, he could never be with anybody with tats etc...then left me for somebody who has tats right across her boobs. He then "loved" tats hmm. I would say that your DH making that sort of committment is bloody lovely actually...he sees you as being in the rest of his life..and that's what you want, right?

FrankiesKnuckle Fri 22-Mar-19 23:26:00

An ex of mine had my name tattooed on him (along with a half naked woman that wasn't me, just off the shelf as it were).
I only found out when I noticed the tell tale scabs on the sheets...
I was rather taken aback.
You see, he was extraordinarily emotionally abusive, he lied, probably cheated and for good measure he knocked me around a few times.
I think it was another control method, I had to stay with him because he'd gone so far as having my name forever etched on his right shoulder blade.

I eventually plucked up the courage to leave, 25 years ago.

I do wonder if he ever had it covered up!

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