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Ear piercing wibu?

(13 Posts)
Mildinsanity Fri 27-Apr-18 10:08:05

It’s a who is being unreasonable not was I unreasonable.
My DD4 wants her ears pierced, because DD3 has them done and so do I.
DD4 is 4 years old and pretty articulate for her age so knows it will hurt, she has clip ons but wants real ones.

Her dad is saying no not until she is much older, he sees her once a fortnight and school holidays but is involved.

However my argument is when we were together he was all for DD3 getting hers done at 4 years old because DD3 wanted them and her dad wasn’t involved, came with us and couldn’t understand why people have an issue with it. He was stepdad to the older 3 and we had DD4 together.

she has been going on regularly for a year and if she wants them I don’t see the problem, it’s a pair of ear studs not a nose ring.
I’d like to take her in the summer holidays when she is 5 but he says no.

WIBU?

bonbonlavie Fri 27-Apr-18 10:09:13

Yeah I wouldn’t go against her father’s wishes

oblada Fri 27-Apr-18 10:12:14

Has he explained why? You should both agree on it.

Aprilmightbemynewname Fri 27-Apr-18 10:13:08

If he was happy for your dd to have them done he is just powered tripping imo. Just get them done,
When he sees dd happy is he going to be the one to take them out?

Mildinsanity Fri 27-Apr-18 10:15:08

I won’t get them done without his agreement but I think it’s unfair he was all ok with DD3 getting them done at 4 years old but won’t allow DD4 at 5 years old because it’s his own flesh and blood.

coffeekittens Fri 27-Apr-18 10:16:15

Sounds like a power thing to me tbh, just let your DD have them done if it’ll make her happy.

Spam88 Fri 27-Apr-18 10:17:40

I think doing that to such small children is horrible, so I agree with him that you shouldn't. But then he's being pretty hypocritical isn't he 🤷‍♀️

19lottie82 Fri 27-Apr-18 10:20:09

Personally I think pierced ears on a child that young looks common (I know MN doesn’t like the word “chavvy”!), but that’s only my opinion. It should be a joint deacision between you and your DDs Dad though.

How old was your older daughter when she got her ears pierced?

DairyisClosed Fri 27-Apr-18 10:20:14

Maybe he saw /read something since about the topic that changed his mind?

JacquesHammer Fri 27-Apr-18 10:23:19

Opinions change. He’s entitled to that.

You both need to be in agreement on body modification

Mildinsanity Fri 27-Apr-18 10:33:40

It’s not a debate on whether people should have children’s ears pierced, Ive always said if my DCs really want them over a period of a year then that’s fine with me. DD4 dad always said the same thing until his own child was born.
I’ve told DD4 if she really wants them done to ask her dad, which she has a few times and he never tells her no just he will speak to me, which then makes me look like the bad guy when he tells me no.

squiggleirl Tue 01-May-18 21:00:55

Not just the Daily Mail who seem to be getting stories from here....

Just a heads up OP, but this has made it on to an Irish newspaper's website....

www.independent.ie/life/family/family-features/doing-that-to-such-small-children-is-horrible-mum-sparks-earpiercing-debate-36861057.html

Mousefunky Tue 01-May-18 21:02:56

My DM had my ears pierced when I was two. My DF hated them so much he took them out and told her I’d lost the earrings. I absolutely don’t blame him for that and he took me to get them done when I was about 8/9 and asked for them. Four is too young and her dad deserves a say.

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