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To ask if you believe in luck?

(25 Posts)
ExtraPineappleExtraHam Wed 14-Feb-18 17:43:58

I hope this doesn't sound like a bragging post but I'm genuinely interested. I mean logically luck doesn't exist, it's nothing you can scientifically verify, but I am a very lucky person. Little things happen to me like my bag going missing in a busy place and then turning up with all its contents a few days later (a lady took it thinking it was hers) and sometimes I think I won't be able to pay my nursery bills and then I get a random rebate from something or I'm paid a week early. This time last year I was struggling to buy groceries and pay my bills and then I applied for a job paying twice what I was earning and got it! Now I am able to buy my own house (something I never imagined.)
I'd love to say that I contribute to these things but I don't feel that I always do, I mean I'm a nice person and I do work hard but I think that I get more than my fair share of lucky breaks. I know people who just have one tragedy after another, then they lose their job and then they get another bit of bad news. It seems so unfair.

mumpoints Wed 14-Feb-18 17:54:30

I believe you make your own luck. Nice people attract nice people and nice things happen. This is going to come across as a stealth boast, sorry!

I say I have a "charmed life", I tried to get DS into a packed nursery with huge waiting list... and they found me a place. We wanted a house with a short school run... found one within walking distance. In both these cases I was told (by nursery head and estate agent) hat they had "remembered" me and when places came up thought of me.

However, I win a lot of stuff also and that can't be down to being remembered! However, to win (premium bonds or whatever) you do have to be "in it to win it". SIL moans that she never wins anything, but she never enters anything either!

I'm also an optimist I suppose. So when I think about my life I remember the good things. Perhaps I have the same life as someone else but they might dwell on the bad stuff and think they are not lucky?

Deshasafraisy Wed 14-Feb-18 17:57:56

Don’t know if it’s luck but chance. If you are a positive person the chances are positive things will happen to you.
My friend always says she never wins anything, guess what she never wins anything.
Another says “oooh I might win this!” And she occasionally does!
Glass half full type of stuff.

Deshasafraisy Wed 14-Feb-18 17:59:16

It’s about perceiving the world with optimism rather than pessimism

MakeItRain Wed 14-Feb-18 18:03:52

I think you sound like a very positive person so you dwell on positive things. Some people might say "I'm so unlucky I've had times where I can't pay my bills" or "I'm so unlucky my bag was taken by someone thinking it was theirs!" But you obviously focus on the positive.
I'm a bit like you in that sometimes I feel lucky (house sold/ found another immediately exactly where I wanted it) but at the same time I was going through an awful divorce so another person may think I was actually not "lucky" to be going through that at all.
I think you will always feel "lucky" if you are someone who can focus on the positives. flowers

RosaRosaRose Wed 14-Feb-18 18:04:45

mum has it right, IMHO. If you look for the negative, you will find it. If you look for the positive, you will find that too. My Dad said that there was a 'self-fulfilling prophesy' and I can certainly understand that. You sound like a lovely up-beat person,extra who appreciates all that life offers you.

RoryAndLogan Wed 14-Feb-18 18:12:38

Agree with the PPs, it's mindset. You've probably forgotten the times a car drove through a big puddle and soaked you, or when you lost your keys etc. Someone who dwells on those things thinks they're followed around by bad luck.

ExtraPineappleExtraHam Wed 14-Feb-18 18:33:41

Thanks everyone, I do agree that you make your own luck, it gets me down when people tell me that I'm so lucky all the time because they're almost discounting the things that I've worked for. An example is my friend who got a job managing a charity shop when she was 19, earning much more than anyone else that age. Loads of our friends said how lucky she was, but they weren't volunteering in a charity shop in their spare time! She was. You have to be in it to win it.

UrsulaPandress Wed 14-Feb-18 18:36:24

I think there is an element of luck in life.

JaneyEJones Wed 14-Feb-18 18:40:31

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Blarblarblar Wed 14-Feb-18 18:48:35

I always feel a bit weird when people say “good things happen to good people” it somehow implies if bad things happen to you it’s because you deserve it in some way and I think that perpetuates am element of victim blaming throughout society. I mean look at trump clearly a not very nice person lots of success.
Anyhow I think a lot of success is down to right place right time so I guess luck. I’ve been very lucky in many ways. I think being a bit lucky and a bit bold can result in good opertunities. (You may also fall on your face)

ExtraPineappleExtraHam Wed 14-Feb-18 18:50:58

@JaneyEJones definitely. I mean people have terrible things happen to them all the time. I work with someone who lost their son at 3 years old and whose mum has terminal cancer. It just feels so unfair. My comments were relating to little things, like competitions, promotions etc.

JaneyEJones Wed 14-Feb-18 18:55:08

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Abouttoblow Wed 14-Feb-18 18:57:46

I'm an extremely positive, glass half full type of person...... but if I didn't have bad luck I'd have no luck at all.
If something can go wrong for me it will.

echt Wed 14-Feb-18 19:01:02

*Don’t know if it’s luck but chance. If you are a positive person the chances are positive things will happen to you. My friend always says she never wins anything, guess what she never wins anything.
Another says “oooh I might win this!” And she occasionally does!
Glass half full type of stuff*

Beyond weird. The winner's winning is not down to their attitude, as you imply it's pure luck, a coincidence. Another way of looking at it is the positive person is so becasue they have won occasionally, and the I never win one because, er...they've never won. They are reacting to objective events, not influencing them.

mumpoints Wed 14-Feb-18 19:27:22

Blarblarblar “good things happen to good people” doesn't mean "bad things never happen to good people". Perhaps it may be true that above average "bad things happen to bad people" but not that "good things never happen to bad people".

You're just increasing your odds.

FluffyWuffy100 Wed 14-Feb-18 19:28:34

Nah, chance and having a positive frame of mind (and confirmation bias).

FluffyWuffy100 Wed 14-Feb-18 19:29:43

It’s a bit MLM bullshit isntnit? The law of attraction? Pretend you’re super successful and you’ll become super sicsessful!

mumpoints Wed 14-Feb-18 19:36:21

FluffyWuffy100 No, it's more:

I found a purse in the ladies in a station. I handed it in. (Nice action.)The woman who lost it asked the station master to contact me blah blah blah, she sent me a gift voucher as a thank you. (Nice action.)

My BIL found £300 in an envelope at work. He kept it. (Bad action.) He was arrested. (Bad action... for him!)

Blarblarblar Wed 14-Feb-18 19:36:27

Mums not following your point. I think it’s a negative statement to put out that “good things happen to good people” it in some way means if something bad happens to you, you probably deserve it. It’s designed to keep us in line. I don’t like it.

FancyNewBeesly Wed 14-Feb-18 19:39:16

This is such nonsense. Plenty of people work hard and never get good fortune.

bathandpjs Wed 14-Feb-18 19:44:15

I read an article once where they asked people if they believed in luck or not. Then they asked them to go through a paper and count the number of adverts.

There was an advert which said "stop you have won £50". Those that believed in luck stopped and claimed their winnings and those who did not believe in luck carried on counting the adverts.

I think with most things people can turn it into "luck". For example, Some could say say my husband and I are so lucky to get the house we have got. Others could say we worked hard and deserved it. Depends which camp you fall into, luck believers or non-luck believers.

mumpoints Wed 14-Feb-18 19:57:49

bathandpjs For example, Some could say say my husband and I are so lucky to get the house we have got. Others could say we worked hard and deserved it. Depends which camp you fall into, luck believers or non-luck believers.

Absolutely. My MIL would say that DH is lucky but SIL is not. But she says DH is lucky because he got a degree, bought his own house and earns a decent salary. She says SIL is unlucky because she didn't go to uni, doesn't have a job and has a housing association house.

Now, whether you do well in the school system may be partly down to chance, but SIL played truant so decreased her odds by quite a lot. Everything else followed on from there.

BrimFire Wed 14-Feb-18 19:59:24

Of course there is luck.

I work with children who have appalling stories. Stuff you couldn't make up. Nothing they could do about it just bad luck they were born into the families they were.The opposite side of the coin to children born into loving, well off homes I guess.

eloisesparkle Wed 14-Feb-18 20:38:20

Yes, some people are luckier than others.

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