To think I shouldnt have to hear my neighbours voice all the time?

[TartanDr3ams]

Ok so small back story is that we bought a mid-terrace property last year. The street is lovely but unfortunately one neighbour is not so much. The neighbour in question is housing assosiation (which i am NOT judging -but its relevent to mention that she is fully DSS and doesnt work, therefore home all day)

Said neighbour has a large family and a large extended family that visit daily. We dont hear any other member of the family except for day to day noise. Nothing unusual. Except for the mother. She is so loud all day every day. Im not sure when she sleeps cause she makes phonecalls all evening and right until 3/4am. She shouts to other members of her family but we never hear their response..but can hear every single word she says. Shes very abrupt and seems to find any excuse to argue with her family members or on the phone (again its only her side we hear). My patience it wearing thin as me and my DP both work full time. We have spoken to said neighbour but she pretty much ignored every word we said and told us its our own stupid fault for buying a house next to a family.

Due to the layout of the house we unfortunately can only fit our bed into the bedroom that is clearly attached to hers. Even considered buying a new bed to swap rooms!

Aibu to consider contacting the housing assosiation and complain about the noise coming from a single person??

[TeasndToast]

Record it. You are going to need proof. Do it over the space of a month then report.

[scurryfunge]

You can complain to the council if she is noisy between 11pm and 7am but it may be difficult to prove her voice exceeds permitted levels.
Could you muffle the noise with a wall covering?

[TartanDr3ams]

I should have said in my first post that we do have recordings where she can be heard + keep a diary. Will look into wall coverings. Now you mention it, when we viewed the house the previous owners had a big solid wood wardrobe along that wall that didnt match their other furniture, maybe it was there to serve a purpose afterall!

[Ffsnothingworks]

If you can fit bookshelves and fit all along that wall and fill with books, that will absorb some of the sound.

Some people have voices that just carry.

[BakedBeeeen]

I feel your pain OP. Even if it isn't that loud, if it is all the time it really wears you down. We had a neighbour like this. He had a big booming annoying voice. We never heard any of the rest of his family, including a newborn baby. It turned out he was half deaf, which made sense. In the end we invested in sound insulation in 2 rooms. It was very worth it. There are different options depending on how much you want to pay.
Didn't make a difference in the summer when windows were open though!

[Pfftkids]

Cover your walls in egg boxes to muffled the sound. Top tip!

[MotherforkingShirtballs]

its relevent to mention that she is fully DSS and doesnt work, therefore home all day

The only bit there that was relevant is that she is home all day. The fact she claims benefits and doesn't work is irrelevant and mentioning it really does make you sound judgey.

If she's shouting on at 3am then you can ask for the council to provide you with recording equipment. You press a button whenever the noise level is high and it tells them what time it was made, how long for, and how loud it was. They can then use that information to see what action is appropriate, including telling her to stop shouting during the small hours.

[TartanDr3ams]

Thanks for the tips - will definitely show my partner and look into them.

May well get onto the council then - we pick up the voice on mobile recordings so im sure proper equipment will too. I just dont really want to cause war with the neighbours so may look at your sound proofing tips first.

Sorry for the judgey comment. Uncalled for from this tired woman today.

[Chrys2017]

Cover your walls in egg boxes to muffled the sound.

Contrary to popular myth, egg boxes will do nothing to absorb sound. They are also not fire-proof, so you probably don't want to be covering your walls in them.

[DonnyAndVladSittingInATree]

she is fully DSS

Is that a syndrome of some kind?

[Flynnshine]

Are you on the other side of my neighbour by any chance?

I feel your pain 100%. We live in a small 2 bed terrace in a lovely little cul-de-sac. A mixture of owned and rented but mostly owned. Except for our immediate neighbour. The house was bought by the local housing association and the family that live there are absolutely feral. I have no other words. I know that not ALL council or HA tenants are like that though and that we have just had the luck of the draw!

The house seems to always be full of people. They have three young children who never seem to sleep, their back and front gardens are just rubbish tips, full of bags of old rubbish, broken bikes/scooters, cans, bottles and bags of cat shit. On top of that the adults and their guests all smoke like chimneys and the smell that seeps through the walls is sometimes unbearable (a mixture of stale cigarette smoke and chip fat) the back fence dividing us is rotten and falling down because of the weeds growing up it - every year I have to cut back the ivy spilling over into our garden. One year they had a sofa in the back garden that their dog used as a toilet for the entire summer. We couldn't use our garden or even have our back door open.

We have complained and complained and complained and nothing is EVER done. It's like even the HA have lost the will to live and have given up. We recently had an extension built and photos were taken inside their house for the party wall agreement. I don't know if we were supposed to be privvy to the pictures but they were sent to us. The children are living in absolute squalor so we raised our concerns with the HA. Still nothing.
I really wish you good luck... but I don't fancy your chances. All that will happen is that it will cause more of a rift between you and make your life even more unbearable. People like that really don't care how their actions affect other people. x

[TartanDr3ams]

Flynnshine if i lived in a cul-de-sac i'd wonder if we really did live close cause you've pretty much just described my neighbours! (I guess thats where my previous unfair benefit comment came from). My neighbours have many children and each of them have children so there is always a housefull (which i dont mind during the days) but they are dirty. They have sectioned off the bottom of the garden and throw all their rubbish over the partition so it looks like landfill. My DP is concerned for our fences rotting but thats a whole different story. They regularly throw their nappies out of the bedroom window onto the FRONT garden during night changes. But saying all this.. its still the one woman who has all her weird really loud night time calls... i do wonder if her husband sleeps in a different room..

[MotherforkingShirtballs]

They regularly throw their nappies out of the bedroom window onto the FRONT garden during night changes

That is grim! I've been know to chuck a folded up nappy down the stairs in the middle of the night so it's waiting next to the door in the morning ready to go in the wheelie bin but why out of the window!?

[TheHungryDonkey]

Throughout your post you have made it all about DSS, HA and you and your husband working full time thus making you more worthy. Maybe she picks up this disdain when you spoke to her because it certainly jumps out here.

[LanguidLobster]

Actually I would speak to the HA about the sectioned off 'skip', that could be a real health hazard and accumulate so it's difficult to clear. That does need to be sorted.

I can sympathise with the noise. I had horribly noisy neighbours in the past and once I'd moved and was starting to drift off to sleep I thought I could still hear her voice and sat bolt upright in shock, it took a few seconds to calm down. Must have been a Pavlovian response!

You could try keeping a noise diary and speaking to the council about having an intermediary/advocate, although it can be hard to reason with certain people

[Flynnshine]

Crikey Tartan, it almost could be the same people!
I forgot to mention the nappies as well as bags of cat poo!

Once I was outside the front of my house when I saw a little girl (no more than 2) walking along the road behind me in the reflection of my front window. I couldn't hear any adult voices and couldn't see any adults around. She walked into the road so I ran over to her and asked her to come towards me away from the road. There were no adults to be seen, then I noticed neighbours front door wide open so I walked holding hands with the little girl and gave the door a loud knock and called in the house. Nothing. For another 5 minutes I stood there knocking and calling until eventually the mother of the house came stomping down the stairs, obviously having been asleep. I told her I had found the little one wandering in the road and all the woman could say was 'I only left her for 5 minutes'
No thanks... no worry that the child could have been seriously hurt. Nothing.
Absolute scum. We have affectionately named them 'The Scumbags'
I hate them and they make our lives miserable but no one in their right mind would buy our house, they would be put off the second they pulled up outside. I wish I could post the pictures I have!

[TartanDr3ams]

Yep motherforking it is gross. Not sure why they cant just keep them inside and put them in the wheelie bin in the morning rather than launch them to sit in the rain all night. The strangest thing is that they DO take care of their front garden..flower beds and lawn at least.

flynnshine thats awful to hear! I work in Childcare so thats really sad that they didnt even notice their child was gone! There really are some awful creatures knocking around!

[TartanDr3ams]

..also wish i could post the pictures we have.

[Pfftkids]

Chrys2017 Relax. I was joking about the egg boxes.

Trying to muffle the sound with something against the wall would help though. Or just shout back shut up!!!

[SimonBridges]

Have you spoken to them?
We have neighbours that sound very similar right down to the rubbish in the garden.
Last night they were making an almighty row shouting at each other and banging about at 3am.
If it gets too bad we knock and tell them.

[Unfinishedkitchen]

OP you have my sympathies. I’ve lived near people like this and they are scum. They are usually also extremely entitled. For example once the house is full of rats or rotten due to neglect, they’ll be screaming down the phone to the council to come and fix it all (for free of course).

[TartanDr3ams]

simonbridges yes we have spoken to them but all they did was go onto facebook and slag us off. Thats where they said it was our own stupid fault for buying a house next to a family. I think the woman in question could argue with her own shaddow. She doesn't drive so her son often takes her shopping etc - the othet night he dropped her home, helpd her in with her bags and then she stood on the street argueing with him for ages!

Yes unfinishedkitchen they are the kind to feel very entitled! One of her boys broke her kitchen window the week we moved in and the way she shouted down the phone for the HA to have it fixed asap was disgusting..didnt quite realise how bad she was at that point though as we were new