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AIBU?

How to give dp an engagement ring (not a proposal)

27 replies

Tattytinsel · 03/12/2017 10:58

I need tips! Dp and I recently got engaged, she proposed with a ring to me. I would like to get dp a ring too but I’m not sure how to give it. My ideas are either - buy dp a wedding planner as a Christmas gift and in one of the pockets place the ring. Create a scrap book of our relationship with a pocket for the ring inside. Just give the ring on Christmas Day or none of these and take dp shopping to choose a ring. If it were you, what would mean the most?
Dp and I are both female btw.

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HighwayDragon1 · 03/12/2017 11:00

I love the wedding planner idea, or a scrapbook. It seems much more personal than just a ring.

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Blahblahblahzeeblah · 03/12/2017 11:00

Would you not like to propose back? I think I probably would.

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dinosaursandtea · 03/12/2017 11:01

Lesbian here! I love the planner idea, although if she’s fussy about jewellery then taking her to get her own ring might be better. Congratulations! We’re celebrating our 5th anniversary in Feb and it’s been wonderful.

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BlondeB83 · 03/12/2017 11:02

Unless you know exactly what she wants, I would take her shopping. I was proposed to without a ring as my DP had planned to do it slightly later and I loved shopping with him. My ring to me is perfect, I love it so much but it’s not what I thought I originally wanted.

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HousefulOfBoysAndMe · 03/12/2017 11:03

Do the wedding planner idea, that sounds lovely.

Save the scrap book for your first wedding anniversary, which is 'Paper'. My dh did that for me and it meant a lot that he'd put so much thought into it.

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Tattytinsel · 03/12/2017 11:03

I don’t want to propose back no, we always said just one of us would propose and she got there first! I know she would love a ring though and luckily she isn’t fussy at all, I’m confident I would get what she likes Smile

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Allthetuppences · 03/12/2017 11:04

It's hard for a bunch of strangers on the internet to decide. My now DH proposed without a ring he terribly unromantically blurted it out by accident as he'd decided to do that around Christmas.
What he then did was discuss with me what I liked in a ring, sized me, bought one and took me out for a spectacular meal where he did the more traditional down on one knee. It was lovely. I was happy all over again. But then I am a sap. Sometimes all the meal and tradition is nice because it's nice. But what do you and your partner do to enjoy time together? Movies? Does she like to dress up? Romantic walks?

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x2boys · 03/12/2017 11:04

I would just take her shopping tbh but then I'm not really romantic , but you could make it a special occasion?

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Allthetuppences · 03/12/2017 11:05

The wedding planner idea does sound sweet as you're surely both excited about that.

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HousefulOfBoysAndMe · 03/12/2017 11:05

It also depends on her - personally I hate the thought of being 'taken shopping' to choose something special myself...it takes all the heart out of it IMO. Part of the reason I love my engagement ring so much is because dh chose it iyswim. BUT, like the pp, some would rather choose themselves - what do you think she'd prefer op?

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Blahblahblahzeeblah · 03/12/2017 11:07

If she doesn't want a proposal then I think I'd take her out shopping or just give the ring like any other gift. The other options are very proposally.

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Chrys2017 · 03/12/2017 11:10

Take her shopping!

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happypoobum · 03/12/2017 11:14

I think the shopping idea is terrible - but I am vair vair old and wouldn't want to chose my own engagement ring.

I would wrap it up and give it to her on Christmas Day.

Congratulations!!!

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Hotheadwheresthecoldbath · 03/12/2017 11:19

I would put it in extremely big box,wrap it and stick it under the tree.

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Kimlek · 03/12/2017 11:23

Huge congratulations!! Given that you are pretty confident in choosing a ring she’ll like then pop it inside the wedding planner. I love your scrap book idea more but as another poster said, you could save that for your 1st paper anniversary.

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leghoul · 03/12/2017 11:23

Big box under the tree is a great idea. Put something heavy in it if possible as well to add to confusion!I would not want to be taken shopping for my ring. Just choose what you think she'd most like. I also like the scrapbook idea.
Oh & congratulatons!

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WooWooSister · 03/12/2017 11:26

I like the wedding planner idea. It makes it clear it's an engagement ring. Plus a planner will be helpful Smile

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Tattytinsel · 03/12/2017 11:48

Seems like the planner idea is a winner. I don’t think I want to put it under the tree as Christmas morning is manic and I might miss her open it. I was thinking as an extra gift later in the day perhaps or take her to the bedroom and ask her to open it? She’s the romantic type so I want it to feel special for her.

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ChinwagCharlieBear · 03/12/2017 11:55

Congratulations, sounds lovely OP.

I would like to go ring shopping if it was me! The wedding planner is a nice idea too.

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yawning801 · 03/12/2017 11:56

In a cracker?

Stole this idea off Coronation Street!

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Doggymum88 · 03/12/2017 11:56

Do you have any pets op? It would be amazing to attach it to a dogs collar and then let her find it!

Im already married but i would love that!

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Tattytinsel · 03/12/2017 12:14

No we don’t have any pets. I will get looking for the perfect planner. It needs to have a pocket to place the ring and not have any reference to grooms which makes buying online tricky.

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Walkerbean16 · 03/12/2017 12:20

Look on etsy for a wedding planner, they have lots on there. Congratulations Smile

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MatildaTheCat · 03/12/2017 12:23

I always give dh any special or personal gifts late on Christmas Eve. It’s a nice way to start and feels more intimate.

I’m also old and would definitely have wanted to choose my ring. It’s easy to say someone isn’t fussy but certain types of ring just don’t work on some people. How about a piece of costume Jewellery and a promise to go shopping? Or choose something from an antique jeweller who is happy to exchange?

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Walkerbean16 · 03/12/2017 12:23

www.etsy.com/uk/listing/497705372/gay-lesbian-wedding-planner-same-sex?ga_order=most_relevant&ga_search_type=all&ga_view_type=gallery&ga_search_query=gay wedding planner&ref=srgallery19

Just an example, you can buy add ons at the end which include a pocket page.

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