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To think we all need to consider what we are posting on Social Media with regards to our children?

(67 Posts)
AintNoOtherFan Fri 01-Dec-17 17:50:48

Whilst I was sat waiting for dd to finish her club I was reading a Digital magazine which helps parents to learn about online safety for children/teenagers.

In it there was an article about how to avoid embarrassing your child (mainly teenage age) on social media etc. It said years ago parents used to show their children's baby pictures to embarrass them but now it's all via Facebook/Instagram etc and it got me thinking.

I have been conscious about posting photos of my children on my Facebook page for a while now, mainly because they are approaching pre-teen age and I don't want them to look back in a few years on my Facebook to find lots of embarrassing pictures of them dressed as a Roman (for school play) or a toddler picture of them with food around their mouths.

I think of my friends I have on Facebook and they post loads of pictures of their children which don't get deleted, some have photos going back years from when they were babies. So whilst some teenagers/young adults might like it and see it as a good way to look back, some might also feel mortified! Especially if parents are posting embarrassing pictures of their teenagers now etc.

I've decided Facebook isn't a place to put my children's pictures on anymore but what do others think?

AintNoOtherFan Fri 01-Dec-17 18:24:43


BubblesBubblesBubbles Fri 01-Dec-17 18:29:27

I have no pictures of my children online. I think there may be one which was taken by a friend and dc1 is in it,

Dh is really anti social media anyway, he doesn’t think even on the tightest security settings it’s safe.

I would never post pictures to embarrass my children anyway. Seems an off thing to do.

WineGummyBear Fri 01-Dec-17 18:29:35

I'm constantly astonished and horrified at what people post on social media. Children can't consent.

JacquesHammer Fri 01-Dec-17 18:30:04

I never share embarrassing pics of anyone whether another adult or my daughter.

The very few pics I share of her are lovely images in special places, hopefully nothing to upset her. I always show her the image before I upload and ask if she minds.

ethelfleda Fri 01-Dec-17 18:36:20

I don't post pics of my son on FB and he is only one month old. I didn't 'announce' the pregnancy or his arrival on there either and yet people in my family still took it upon themselves to do this on our behalf...

AintNoOtherFan Fri 01-Dec-17 18:36:41

Some pictures might not even be an embarrassing picture per se, it could just be a picture of when they were 8 dressed in a dress they thought was nice at 8 but be mortified if their friends saw said picture when they are 15!

selly24 Fri 01-Dec-17 18:40:59

Thanks for raising this OP. I gage thought for a while that it is just a matter if time before someone (grown up child) sues their parents for posting inappropriate photos of them. Messy yoghurt face is one thing but some parents are disrespectful and tasteless about what they share. (eg. A&E pics, virtually naked 'chicken pox' photos. Problem is it is so easy to post yet stay there in the ether of the internet. As people move on and post something else, the fact it remains is forgotten....

selly24 Fri 01-Dec-17 18:41:40

had not 'gage'

ghostyslovesheets Fri 01-Dec-17 18:44:21

not sure how my kids friend will see stuff on my FB page though - they aren't my friends and I don;t tag my kids in pics because I don;t want to share stuff with their mates

AintNoOtherFan Fri 01-Dec-17 18:48:11

People do share bizarre photos yes, like you said A&E pics, chicken pox pics etc. Then there's bath pictures with bottoms showing and pics of injuries.

Maybe people need to have a little look at their forgotten pictures on Facebook and maybe have a deleting session?

bluemosquito Fri 01-Dec-17 18:50:04

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

AintNoOtherFan Fri 01-Dec-17 18:52:57

I've always done a "physical " photo album. Once a year I choose the best pictures and get them printed off and put them in an album. That way my kids can look back on their childhood if the wish and show who they want.

trilbydoll Fri 01-Dec-17 18:56:52

I have taken starting school as the cut off point for sharing pics of dd1 - she's a little girl now not a cute toddler and although I think she's still gorgeous I would be mortified if pictures of me aged 5 were on the Internet for anyone to find.

I didn't share a huge amount before but now I don't have any of her.

PorklessPie Fri 01-Dec-17 19:02:44

I've deleted Facebook, but when I was on there I never posted photos of my children. I did constantly post photos of my cats though grin and my Instagram is in my cats name.

Wishingandwaiting Fri 01-Dec-17 19:08:04

I am very careful.

I also think of my children’s dirtier employment. What happens if my daughter is a future prime minister? I don’t want her baby bottom emblazoned over the daily mail or funny quips where she had a potty accident etc.

It’s so unfair. They have no say over what we publicise.

Wishingandwaiting Fri 01-Dec-17 19:08:22

Dirtier should say “future”!!

MrsFantastic Fri 01-Dec-17 19:11:13

I agree with you, OP. I don't post anything about my children or pictures of them on Facebook.

QuackingHell Fri 01-Dec-17 19:11:33

Stuff like this makes me really wonder if it’s a lack of understanding from different generations. I’m young enough that I was a teen on social media and I shared the embarrassing baby and child photos myself! As did all my friends. These children will grow up sharing on social media themselves. I honestly can’t see my children minding that I shared nice photos of OUR life. When they are 15 if they don’t want their friends to see the photos I shared of them when they were little, I just won’t let their friends follow me/friend me on social media. People seem to get so concerned with their children’s privacy. It’s no different than showing your family holiday photos to your friend who lives round the corner and Aunty So and so that lives down the road. We just happen to live in a society that families and friends are much further apart.. I wish I could see my mums perspective at the time on all the photos she took of me as a child, instead of her giving me a narrative retrospectively.

Littlecaf Fri 01-Dec-17 19:12:22

I put the odd photo of my kids on Facebook. My privacy is friends only and I can’t be tagged in photos. I don’t have any photos that can identify where they are or we live. Not embarrassing ones etc but my family like to see them and so do some of my friends. Do I worry about paedophiles? Of course. But not to an hysterical Daily Mail type extent, that’s silly. Most people just go ‘awww’ (Or ‘boring’!) and scroll on by.

Each to there own though.

AintNoOtherFan Fri 01-Dec-17 19:13:27

I also think once others start liking the pictures it can some become out of your control who sees them. Things pop up all the time on my newsfeed of pictures of people I don't know and not friends with because a friend of mine has liked it.

NerrSnerr Fri 01-Dec-17 19:19:01

I also think once others start liking* the pictures it can some become out of your control who sees them*

If you have your settings to ‘friends only’ then only your friends will see the photos whoever likes them. This is one of the issues with SM is that many users don’t know how to manage their settings.

NannyOggsKnickers Fri 01-Dec-17 19:21:13

The issue for me is around consent and also about being a good role model. In my job is see lots of young people who think they are savvy online. Sadly, many of them make the mistake of sharing images with people they trust and are eventually humiliated. And it’s not just the illegal stuff. I spent an hour yesterday sorting out an issue between two sixteen year old boys cause by Snapchat. One boy had shared a video of himself messing around on a game and his trusted friend had sent it to a load of boys who have been bullying him. They then reposted it to other sites with some pretty cruel commentary.

It is so easy to share things these days. Once it is out there it is out of your control and you never know what someone might do with it.

CaptainsCat Fri 01-Dec-17 19:25:19

Quacking don’t think it’s a generational thing - im also young enough to have had social media as a teen, and I still don’t share pictures of my DD online. I don’t bother with FB etc anymore which makes it easy smile As far as I’m concerned though she has the right to privacy, and it is my job to protect that.

IAmNotAWitch Fri 01-Dec-17 19:30:00

I never put photos online on my kids when they were younger. They will now appear in group pics etc and I am fine with that.

Their lives do not belong to me. When they get older they can put all the photos of their childhood online if they like, but it is not my call to make.

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