to think there's no other way to look at this than unbearably rude?

[Council]

I'm part of a social group, through a shared interest, that includes men and women from age mid 20s to 80+

I had something to celebrate at one of our events last week and as is traditional took some cakes. I don't bake and was going to buy them but I have a lovely friend who loves to bake but is always watching her weight so on the look out for people to bake for. She offered. Her cakes are simple "family" traybakes etc ideal for serving large numbers and usually very good.

Anyway, the event went well and we were socialising with coffee and the cake afterwards when one member of the group took a small nibble of a cake, already screwing her face up before tasting it, then pulled an even more ridiculous face and spat it out.

It was a coconut cake, not awful but maybe not up to friend's normal standard, a little dry.

The woman in question, I suspect, does have some food issues, mid 50s, stick thin, exercise obsessed and if we're arranging a group meal will only come if Sea Bass is on the menu. But, she knows she has some issues around food, why have the cake at all if that's what you're going to do with it?

Apart from the fact that she was rude to me, I felt so bad for my friend, who was also there.

So, incredibly rude, or justified by her food issues?

[doodle01]

Nut allergy anaphylactic shock cardiac arrest and death.Maybe it was just a bad cake.

[SloeSloeQuickQuickGin]

You are projecting she has 'food issues'.

But she was rude, yes, unless of course your other friend does make insufferable cakes

[Council]

She knew it was a coconut cake when she picked it up. I don't care how awful it was, you don't spit it our publicly with drama. She'd only had a tiny nibble, at the very least she could have discretely disposed of it via her hand.

[bengalcat]

Yes rude . If a cake isn't to your taste just politely wrap it up in a napkin and dispose of it discretely .

[Chathamhouserules]

Yes very rude. She made a bit of a fool of herself I think.

[doodle01]

Instinctive reaction you cant expect someone to swallow something they dont like just because its home made.

[doodle01]

have you ever laughed with a mouthful of wine and been unsure you can swallow it or have to spit it back into glass.

[Ttbb]

It's very rude. She nearly didn't like to look of it sovwhy try it? Also, what kind of adult actually spits out food?

[AnyFucker]

Very rude

If I get homebaked cake I am in ecstacy, tbh

If it's a bit crap you eat it anyway or just quietly leave it on your plate. No need for the dramaz, is there ?

[ButchyRestingFace]

Is that all she did?

Was she standing directly in front of your friend when she did this?

Did she then clutch her throat and float feather-like to the floor, writhing in paroxyms of agony whilst foaming at the mouth?

Did she launch it like a polaris missile across the room whilst screaming “Oh my fucking God, that is the most rancid thing I’ve ever tasted!!!”?

If none of the above - meh, not terribly polite but not the biggest social faux pas ever, is it?

As for why she took a bite, maybe she thought it would improve on being eaten?

[RefuseTheLies]

Rude and attention seeking behaviour. If the cake wasn't to her liking, she could have disposed of the food in her mouth discreetly.

[WorraLiberty]

Horribly rude.

However, that doesn't mean she has 'food issues'.

It could just be a 'lack of manners issue'.

[DullAndOld]

yes it was rude. Silly woman. but there are a lot of them about.
Reminds me of the tiem i was cooking parsnip and something soup in my student house, flatmate announces she is 'allergic' to parsnips then aks if she can have a 'tiny taste' = bites a bit of parsnip and spits it out screaming....
Totally batty woman.
She was stick thin too now u mention it.
Do not give her another thought OP.

[Council]

Yes, it could Worra or maybe both. I was trying to be charitable and find an excuse for her.

[SaucyJack]

She sounds like my first MIL.

Sadly, some people never manage to move past a mental age of 3 when it comes to food.

Do what like. Eat what you want to. Order a lemonade in the pub. Whatevs.

But don't put on a performance about it when other people are trying to enjoy their meal. Grow the fuck up, Janet.

[AnyFucker]

That made me laugh butchy

[Council]

Actually butchy it wasn't a million miles from what you describe. It was certainly done with some drama and plenty of noise.

[ButchyRestingFace]

Actually butchy it wasn't a million miles from what you describe. It was certainly done with some drama and plenty of noise.

In that case, maybe she’s in the wrong group? Unless your group is the local amateur dramatic society, of course. Maybe you could point her the way? ➡️

Your friend sounds like a lovely person, btw. Best hang on to her. You know what they say - a cake in the mouth is worth two in the hand. 😊

[Ilovelampandchair]

Some people have no facial expression filter. I'd feel sorry for her rather than upset at her.

[chocatoo]

Just plain rude. She sounds hard work.

[Worriedrose]

I was thinking am dram too!

[Bluntness100]

Is that all she did?

What? Because what she did wasn’t quite rude enough?

Yes, of course it was terribly rude op, you don’t spit food out in public no matter who made it, much less in front of the cook. You discreetly turn away and dispose of it into your napkin if it really is rancid, or swallow it down politely and leave the rest.

[Council]

Oh, I hadn't put the two things together butchy but she is an actress - a real one, that's what she does for a living. No-one you'll have heard of though

[ButchyRestingFace]

you don’t spit food out in public no matter who made it, much less in front of the cook

But OP didn’t say it was in front of the cook, or even where she spat it, which is why I asked.

If the woman was talking directly to the cook and spat the food out (where - the floor?) then yes, vair bad manners and all that.

But if the cook was just in the general vincinity and the woman spat the offending article into a napkin, well, meh.

[ILostItInTheEarlyNineties]

Very childish although I would tell my children off if they did that.

The polite thing to do if you really can't swallow is to store it in your cheeks like a hamster and dispose of it afterwards.