Dd has some support needs right now, complex and distressing reasons. Before the holidays we were concerned that school (secondary) was falling short of handling it well so we made a plan.
If dd leaves class (she has a pass for this) she would have a safe place to sit and calm, or talk and discuss what's going on if needed. After a short while she would be asked if she felt any better. If not, she stays a bit longer and they try again. Then she'll either go to class or they will call us to possibly pick up or speak to her ourselves.
If it's that bad that she's in tears and asks to go home, they will call and we'll discuss it.
All agreed. We've come back and nothing has changed. I even emailed the school before term started to let them know dd was not "better" and we'd appreciate the same treatment as last term.
Dd had Monday off this week. She was sad, close to tears and couldn't drag herself out of bed. Today she didn't look like she was going to get up, but she did. Got dressed (albeit slowly) and I was relieved she clearly wasn't feeling good but wanted to give it a go. By 11 she was texting me, from outside the cp office as they were too busy to see her and she couldn't face going to class. She needed to talk to someone. Her phone was dying so I told her to go to the toilet, wash her face and freshen up, then go to the house office and see how she's feeling. If she needed to come home we would get her.
I called and spoke to the office. Explained she was in the toilets upset could someone check on her please, she's having a bad day. I call a couple of hrs later to see if she was ok. I was told she'd gone back to class and was fine. Later the same teacher called dh and told him dd had come out of class again to the house office and then been taken back to class.
Dd, distressed at the end of the day, tells it differently. That after my call the cp teacher found her and told the house office that she wasn't feeling good and wanted to go home. The teacher "gave a speech about staying in school then said he had a call to make" and that they would talk when he came back. But when he came back he said he'd walk her to class instead, and then did. She went to lunch then class and came out again soon after to house office to say she wanted to go home but was sent back to class. She says she went along with it because she doesn't want to be in trouble for saying no. She already asked to go home and if they didn't listen already, being rude wouldn't help.
Dh called the school and was told that nobody from the "management" (head, deputy, hoy, cp team) was on site. Dh asked them to pass on a short note about what happened today and that we would not send dd in until we've had a(nother) meeting about it. Are we "allowed" to do this? What happens next?
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AIBU?
To ask what happens if you refuse to send your child to school-short term
26 replies
Pickingrandomname · 22/09/2017 18:12
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