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Anniversary flowers

(10 Posts)
Hope34 Tue 19-Sep-17 21:42:23

AIBU...just ranting really

My alcoholic husband, with a temper and occasionally verbally abusive too me...decides to get a bouquet of flowers for our anniversary ...many green twigs and leaves with about 5 flowers..

I really he wish he didn't bother, probably spent a fortune on them ..I was polite but as usual disappointed and don't want to be reminded if our awful situation.... he never gets me anything so today was nice....

It's not about the flowers...I am just sad....

MaidOfStars Tue 19-Sep-17 21:45:12

It's not about the flowers. (It's more than I get but I don't have a husband who needs to 'try hard' or 'make up').

Can you think about a future without him?


PollytheDoily Tue 19-Sep-17 21:54:17

Would you like to tell us more?

Do you want to leave? Can you?

Hope34 Tue 19-Sep-17 22:16:30

Thank you for your messages.

I am stuck for the moment, 2 young kids, I don't earn enough to support us...but I am working on it and in the mean time I am sticking my head in the way to keep going...sorry for the self pity....I have no family support...and living some where new with no friends near by. I have an ok job but with amazing colleagues( Sho do t know about my home situation- I would rather keep it private)

I am fine. i am strong mentally and have 2 great kids who are my priority...

Thanks xx

MaidOfStars Tue 19-Sep-17 22:30:10

Have you checked what kind of benefits/credits you might be entitled to if you were to leave?

Aquamarine1029 Tue 19-Sep-17 22:32:56

Your post has nothing to do with stupid flowers. You're sad because you live with an abusive, alcoholic bully. Is this the environment you want to raise your children in? For them to grow up thinking this is normal?

Hope34 Tue 19-Sep-17 23:00:45

I agree ...I am working on it...I don't want my kids to think this is normal....

I work full time, with no support

I am saving at present -rent and childcare are not possible on my take home pay...

I would love to run away, but would want to keep kids where we are now for some stability in their lives i.e. Same school, same childminder...

I am not entitled to benefits etc,

I never thought this would be me....

PollytheDoily Wed 20-Sep-17 19:24:46


MrsMHasIt Wed 20-Sep-17 19:59:37

I get that it's not about flowers but yes, the flowers are terrible. I also understand that there is a journey and you can't always leave right away, especially if it's not 'too bad' yet.
You are mentally strong, make sure you see this through to the full outcome before he erodes that strength.
No one plans this. But now you have the beginnings of a new plan, your tomorrow will be better.

Hope34 Thu 21-Sep-17 21:00:51

Thank you for all your support xx

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