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Leaving SN son of school for his 5th birthday... Details inside

(18 Posts)
Damonlufc88 Sun 09-Jul-17 15:48:54

My son is almost 5 and in reception class at mainstream school. All this school year he has only been doing 12:50-15:30 due to him not settling. This, if feel was more requested by the school than me and his mum. Anyway he is leaving mainstream and starts special school in September. We're on my having family and close friends for a party next weekend and his birthday falls a week on Tuesday. With him only doing a few hours is it unreasonable for me to leave him out of school and do something special with him... NOT THAT HE IS AWARE IT'S HIS BIRTHDAY he has little understanding of the world and is on the Autism diagnosis assessment waiting-list. He has a class disco the following day and I know for a fact it will unsettle him (he scarpers anytime he has to go into the school hall, he has very basic language and I don't want him pushing out at other children and ruin their day)

Please don't judge me because it's been a tough year with him only doing part time + with his young brother doing preschool and me and his mum working full time and her almost full time. It would just be nice to do something for the day, seaside or something as a family.

Bumdishcloths Sun 09-Jul-17 15:53:01

Will doing something that's not school, when he expects school, upset his routine?

If not, then YANBU

stella23 Sun 09-Jul-17 15:55:02

Or course, as long as he's happy

JennyOnAPlate Sun 09-Jul-17 15:55:39

Yanbu at all.

Bunlicker Sun 09-Jul-17 15:56:02

SEaside sounds good smile Take the day off.

Bunlicker Sun 09-Jul-17 15:56:38

Also he's four, so not even mandatory age yet?

Bunlicker Sun 09-Jul-17 15:57:09

Although thinking about it will be that day!grin

Still would though

Allthewaves Sun 09-Jul-17 16:02:27

I'd send him to school and take him put on the disco day to do something special

TrinityTaylor Sun 09-Jul-17 16:05:29

You sound like a fab dad and I totally would take him to the seaside or something, if you know he'd enjoy it and not be unsettled by the change. Go for it!

BackforGood Sun 09-Jul-17 16:08:52

Like AlltheWAves, I would be inclined to take him out on the day of the Disco, if that is something that will overwhelm him / make him anxious, rather than a 'usual' day.

Aeroflotgirl Sun 09-Jul-17 16:09:25

Go for it, and have a lovely day smile.

Starlight2345 Sun 09-Jul-17 16:12:44

Yes they can't fine you till term after they are 5..Do what you think is best for your DS.

VinIsGroot Sun 09-Jul-17 16:16:13

Yep take him out !!! Ds7 is in SEN school and it is encouraged to do activities with your children?!! The seaside is an education to SN kids!
Have fun...fingers crossed he'll love his SEN so much, he will be able to stay all day!!?

youarenotkiddingme Sun 09-Jul-17 16:19:31

Yes I'd do it.

I hate all this fining when there's loads of children only going pt because it takes so long to get the support they need.

FoofFighter Sun 09-Jul-17 16:20:05

Leave him in on his birthday and take him out the following day, when the disco is on? Makes more sense to me?

Mummyoflittledragon Sun 09-Jul-17 16:27:39

I'd take him out the day of the disco. It makes much more sense. It is still celebrating his birthday and he doesn't know any different so there's no harm done or hiding of facts.

Ameliablue Sun 09-Jul-17 16:29:08

Leave him in on his birthday and take him out the following day, when the disco is on? Makes more sense to me?

I'd do this too.

Damonlufc88 Sun 09-Jul-17 16:48:39

Thanks guys overwhelmed with your advice. Also I would have taken him on the disco day BUT the disco is pretty short notice and me and his mum only have the Monday and the Tuesday (birthday) off of work now. I'm going to ask if he can have his regular 1:1 on the disco day but of not I can arrange childcare.
He has a fairly structured routine he would only realise that he wants to go school if he actually goes to the building, he has 0 concept of days of the week and presents/santa clause or any society rules so I'm pretty confident he wouldn't be unsettled.

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