neighbours

[hopeandpeace]

My little boy is 7 and I don't let him play out alone as the cars go fast up the street and feel he is too young yet
I do let him play out with me sat in the front garden and he likes playing Kirby with an older girl who lives next door. There is a family across the road with a 5 year old little boy who is allowed to play out on his own and he always knocks on the door for my little boy so I say they can play in our back garden or I will sit out the front with them. The only thing is its everyday and with the little boy only being 5 he needs properly looking after and supervising so it can be exhausting as I work all day and suffer with anxiety I feel responsible when he's out the front with me and my little boy as he goes in the road and goes out of sight. Also I'm worried about him falling on our trampoline in the back garden. I always take my little boy to the park, he does football, brigade and drama classes during the week after school but when we get back the little boy is out on the street wanting to come in. I said no today as I had to get my little boy changed and his tea before going to his drama class and he just kept banging and shouting at the door and window. The little boys mum then grabbed him in and said he was grounded and he was screaming and so upset it was awful. I wondered if anyone else had experience like this?

[hopeandpeace]

I have friends from school over to my house for tea a lot but it's always where the parent picks them up after a set time and they always play in the house, garden or go to the park.

[Spiderpants]

Yes, my children are no longer allowed out the front to play because I got so fed up of supervising the whole bloody street whilst their parents sat inside doing nothing.
It was so much the watching them as they just ran across the road but the teaching them basic manners e.g not to drop litter, swear and say please etc that I couldn't stand it any more

[chloesmumtoo]

I think most parents end up with situations like this. I think you just need to keep sending him on his way as it wont get any easier. He will be opening your door and letting himself in soon, they can get a bit too much. Sad but obviously let out to busy himself and the parent hasn't a care in the world. They can also love the attention as may not get much at home and become very full on. You turn into babysitter as already noted.
We had different children at our house on and off. But some can get rather draining if they knock everyday and are too persistant and wont take no as no. Used to find it so frustrating especially when I had pre explained 'not tomorrow' in advance. Then low and behold, they would be knocking again and then questioning 'why?' at the door.
A certain one I would have to block the doorway with my body else would squeeze in. Remember it well Always preferred play dates pre arranged properly rather than the children knocking randomly on the door. I don't miss those days now mine are older.

[hopeandpeace]

It's really hard because if felt really guilty today and he just wouldn't stop banging. Then because I didn't let him play his mum was shouting at him and dragging him home so I felt like I caused that. It difficult aswell as my little boy wants to play with him everyday when he knocks on the door and he has his friends over at least twice a week and we do afterschool activities and the park most days but I know he will be upset if I say no so it's difficult.

[hopeandpeace]

Bumping x

[CookieLady]

I don't have any words of wisdom I'm afraid. But you mustn't blame yourself. His mother shouldn't have shouted at him. It's an awkward position you're in.

[chloesmumtoo]

I can understand how you feel hopeandpeace. It does make you feel bad. I had 2 Dc's and although mine did not do a lot of clubs we had a lot of other issues with dd's health and I just couldn't take on other children all the time. It does tug at your heart strings though. I don't think there is any easy solution. I think you just have to do what suits you and your ds at the time and try not to feel guilty (easier said than done I know) and the mum made that ten times worse.