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AIBU?

To ask for my £20 back for a leaving present after a colleague re-returned to work a few weeks later as a contractor

34 replies

jdoe8 · 30/06/2017 16:06

Just that really. He's now been "back" for almost two years and his contract keeps being extended. He only left for a few weeks (maybe 6 at most) that I gather was the legal minimum amount to return.

The person collecting the money wasn't in the know, but I do think said person should of refused the leaving gift and refunded everyone (expensive watch). I wasn't going to give so much but it's the only cash I had when I was asked and didn't want to sound awful as to ask for some change.

AIBU to ask this in jest at a work night out tonight?

OP posts:
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maggiethemagpie · 30/06/2017 16:09

I had similar, a colleague was on a fixed term contract and we all paid in to a leaving present (not as much as you though), they then converted her to a permanent contract on her last day.

To make it worse she then had her birthday a few weeks later and her manager asked us all to chip in for that as well! The girl herself is lovely and wouldn't have asked for anything, I think she was a bit embarrassed to be honest.

Don't ask for your money back. You'll look as tight as anything and people will be gossiping about it for ages. Even if you try to do it 'in jest'.

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CrohnicallyPregnant · 30/06/2017 16:10

I think 2 years later is a bit late, I'd have said it when they first returned- 'oi, X, thought you left?'
'I did but I'm back'
'Well, better return the leaving gift then!'

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Pagwatch · 30/06/2017 16:10

What do you want to achieve?

I'm not being snarky but seriously, what outcome do you want?

If you want to just say 'I donated more than I could afford to your leaving collection and I think you were taking the piss' then you ought to try and just say that rather than pretend it's in jest.

Saying it in jest is likely to leave you feeling shit and him just brushing you off. Plus you'll just appear snarky

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jdoe8 · 30/06/2017 16:11

Not even as a joke? It's been years now but still I can't forget it....lighthearted but I am tight

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NicolasFlamel · 30/06/2017 16:11

Two years later is a bit lame! I'd just leave it.

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RhubardGin · 30/06/2017 16:12

It's annoying I agree. But after 2 years I would just let it go.

If you mention anything tonight be prepared for an extremely awkward Monday morning, and you don't want to be know as that person.

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VeryButchyRestingFace · 30/06/2017 16:12

I think 2 years later is a bit late

This.

To the power of 10.

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expatinscotland · 30/06/2017 16:13

Two years ago? I think you need to let this go.

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RhubardGin · 30/06/2017 16:16

Also, if you mention this, even as a "joke" (which by the way nobody will find funny, awkward silence ahead) the employee in question will feel really embarrassed and feel like people have been speaking about him behind his back.

You run the risk of coming off a bit nutty!

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jdoe8 · 30/06/2017 16:16

this is lighthearted! I don't spend every second thinking about it, haven't thought about it for ages until just now.

it was a bit off for him to accept it knowing he will be back (on significantly more than most people) though right?

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Pagwatch · 30/06/2017 16:19

It doesn't sound like a joke on here so I suspect that however you imagine that you mean it, it will be viewed as a serious grudge if you raise it.

So do it and let us know how the next day at work goes

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araiwa · 30/06/2017 16:25

Comedy is all about timing

2 years suggests it wouldnt be funny and everyone will think youre weird and took 2 years to come up with some lame joke

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BerylStreep · 30/06/2017 16:26

You could maybe just keep asking him what time it is. At least you would gain some benefit from the watch.

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upperlimit · 30/06/2017 16:27

I also think you've missed your window Grin

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DailyMailReadersAreThick · 30/06/2017 16:27

Your post didn't sound lighthearted, but I'm relieved it is!

You could maybe just keep asking him what time it is. At least you would gain some benefit from the watch.

Grin

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Pagwatch · 30/06/2017 16:29

Sometimes I think of a funny response several days later
That's annoying. I might start emailing people

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FizzyGreenWater · 30/06/2017 16:30

Two years later?

You are clearly not going to get over this.

Is there any way you can claw back the outlay? Does he have things in a communal fridge you can steal?

Failing that can you 'accidentally' pour milk or something over the watch? Or some kind of blowtorch accident (he'd lose the whole wrist though too so possibly not that)

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Changebagsandgladrags · 30/06/2017 16:31

I had this when I 'left' my job. I was actually only going on secondment, so 18 months later I came back. Loads of people had paid into a leaving present and I felt a right pranny going back.

I finally really left last year after roughly 15 years and I said NO PRESENT.

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RideOn · 30/06/2017 16:31

Leave it!

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RhubardGin · 30/06/2017 16:31

So he knew he was definitely coming back when he received the gift?

I know this is lighthearted but just a thought!

If Management knew he was coming back and lied to the team and allowed everyone to put money in towards a leaving gift that could almost be classed as fraud and should have been taken up with HR.

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annielouise · 30/06/2017 16:32

All you can do is wait until he leaves for good then you can have a joke then.

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TattyCat · 30/06/2017 16:33

Look at it another way.

At some point, his contract won't be renewed, or could even be terminated for any reason. As a contractor, he won't be getting any 'leaving' present; contractors generally don't but if there happened to be a collection, you can say 'no'!

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PoorYorick · 30/06/2017 16:39

AIBU to ask this in jest at a work night out tonight?

Yes, partly because it's been two years and partly because there would be nothing jesting or jovial about it. And it would be so obvious.

Passive aggressive snarks dressed up as good-natured jokes are just so horrid. I don't think people realise just how awful it makes them look. And two years after the fact? The only person you'd be embarrassing is yourself.

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PinkHeart5911 · 30/06/2017 16:42

It's been 2 years 😂 Let it go, Let it go.......

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muckypup73 · 30/06/2017 16:48

you have let this chew you up for over 2 years? do you suffer depression? this is not right.

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