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AIBU to ask DS 14, to wait until he's older to drink?

(7 Posts)
Canaryyellow1 Thu 29-Jun-17 17:21:49

I found out that my DS has had the 'odd' drink while out with his friends over the past few months.

One of his friends seems to be wanting to do it every week now, and one of the others thought it would be great to 'buy a tent' so they could camp up?! Where I have no clue.

I just think it's far too young to be drinking full stop. I've had a frank discussion with my DS, and over a few weeks got him to open up to me. I've told him that I want him to stop, and that he should start seeing the friend who wants to drink every week less and less - otherwise he'll be drinking every week too.

I know that the experimentation kicks in, but in my mind the longer you can wait the more maturity you'll have. I have known a family member who began their drinking problems at his age. My DS has said that his friend who drinks lacks confidence and he thinks he is getting a bit out of control.

I'm now a bit wary when he asks to stay overnight at his friends. I let him into town and to his friends and a sports club at the weekends, sometimes after school. I'd rather he wait until 16 if I'm honest. He's very led by his peers and lacks confidence in himself too. I don't want him to find it in drink.

theymademejoin Thu 29-Jun-17 19:05:45

I think you're absolutely right. That's way too young to be drinking, especially regularly. It's really hard though, when their friends are all drinking. They seem to be doing it younger and younger.

Pengggwn Thu 29-Jun-17 19:15:48

I think it is admirable that you have started by asking, but you need to finish by telling.

madcatwoman61 Thu 29-Jun-17 19:28:40

YABU unreasonable to ask him - he's 14, you TELL him

Canaryyellow1 Thu 29-Jun-17 19:28:43

Thanks. I have told him, but I haven't stopped him going out. So much pressure on them, they are still pretty clueless.

Pengggwn Thu 29-Jun-17 19:32:37

If he doesn't co-operate, then you do need to stop him going out. You're absolutely right that regular drinking at 14 is a very bad idea.

junebirthdaygirl Thu 29-Jun-17 20:15:40

A study done here in lreland showed teens expected their parents to object and do better when they do..Put a stop to his going out . Maybe make your home a place where they come to game etc so at least youre around. Camping is deadly as they often chose by a river and there is the danger of falling in. Every year you can get him by the better.

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