...to not want to pay for someone elses holiday?

[Drivingmenuts]

A very good friend of mine's husband decided to have a 40th birthday party in a villa. They are well off and wanted to celebrate for a week surrounded by friends - fair enough. I was up for it, even though we couldn't really afford it, as it would be fun and a chance for all the kids to get to know each other. We paid a small deposit and agreed to go (five couples in total), thinking easyjet flights would be a few hundred pounds and if we cooked in the villa it would be manageable.

Since then, we've had some bad luck financially and had to pull out of the holiday, partly as the flights were coming in at more than I earn in a month.

My friends DH has asked me to pay the rest of what we owed for the villa. I am totally fine doing this as I don't want them to be out of pocket because of our mistake in originally agreeing to go. (If the boot was on the other foot and I was well off and my friend was struggling to pay basic bills, there is no way I would ask for the money, but that's beside the point).

The thing that galls me is in the photos on Facebook there is another couple on the holiday - clearly in the room that was 'ours.'

I don't mind covering a hole we left in the bill but I don't think its fair for us to pay for someone else's holiday.

What do I do - should I say 'why don't you ask xxx for the money as they stayed in the room?' Should I ask them to pay me the deposit back? Or should I just suck it up and pay them?

[Pumpkintopf]

Surely if they managed to fill the space you shouldn't have to pay anything but the deposit?!

[MyfatheristheKing]

Have you paid the money already?

[SoupDragon]

No, you shouldn't suck it up if another couple have definitely gone in your place!

[Sirzy]

I would say "brilliant that you found someone else to take our places, do you want me to send my bank details over so you can refund me what I paid?"

[pasturesgreen]

No way should you pay if they managed to fill your space, the cheek of them!

[CaoNiMartacus]

Cancel the cheque!

[Allabitmuchisntit]

How can you be so certain that this couple actually stayed at the villa?

[Whathaveilost]

Are you sure the other couple are definitely staying in the villa and not just joined up with them for a party or something while staying somewhere else?
I'd say double check your facts before you decide what to do or say.

[Butterymuffin]

I doubt you'll get the deposit back so I'd suck that up, but I wouldn't pay any more. Say 'Oh, that will have been paid by the couple who took our place, surely?' If they come up with nonsense about 'they were told it would be paid for' the answer is 'no, we lost our deposit by pulling out but we're not then obliged to pay for our replacements'.

[jacks11]

If you are sure the other couple are staying in your room (sounds like this is the case), then I wouldn't pay the balance. The couple who went can pay for their own holiday.

It would have been fair enough if they hadn't been able to find someone else to take your place, as you had agreed to go (your friends financial position is irrelevant). That doesn't sound it is the case, if so you don't owe them anything. I'd point out you are aware that another couple went in your place and so you won't be paying for it. Not sure I like the sound of your friends if they expect you to pay for another couple to go on holiday.

[thenightsky]

What Sirzy said.

[jacks11]

But do agree with a PP- probably best to be sure the other couple were staying in the villa, not just visiting.

[ApproachingATunnel]

Jesus, of course don't pay! You are under no obligation, moreover they have ppl to take your place so they won't be out of pocket! Point that out to them politely and job done...

[AlternativeTentacle]

What do I do - should I say 'why don't you ask xxx for the money as they stayed in the room?' Should I ask them to pay me the deposit back? Or should I just suck it up and pay them?

The middle one, then the first one and never the last one!

[DontOpenDeadInside]

I'll bet they've split the money 6 ways with the others to lessen the cost (so other couple has paid- but not as much as you would have) Or the other couple has paid and the host has been paid twice.

[Drivingmenuts]

Good point I am not 100% sure, I will ask some of the other friends who went if anyone was able to use our room in the end...

[ThroughThickAndThin01]

I agree with Sirzy too.

You need to put them on the spot.

[f83mx]

vv cheeky if they did - but yes check with other friends first before putting your foot in it!

[expatinscotland]

I'd suck up the deposit, and that's it. Pretty cheeky of them.

[WaahImTellingTheDorchester]

Sounds like you haven't paid already?

Check out as suggested above that other couple were actually on the holiday. Then -

'Hi X,

Yes we were so sorry to have to pull out. I can see from the pics that you found someone to take our room after all, so presumably it's just the deposit you're referring to when you talk about the outstanding costs for the villa? If so I think that's already paid. Cheers, Driving'

[HunterHearstHelmsley]

I suspect they've probably said to the new couple "do you want to come? Its all paid for". I suppose it depends on what you said when you dropped out, if you said you didn't want the money back or you were happy to pay the accommodation or similar.