Toddlers and weddings

[YouJumpIJumpJack]

Dp and I are getting married next year and are looking at venues. We've seen a few already and know that we want something old with character.

We've found what we think is the perfect venue. Great food, location etc. But it has lots of stairs up to the loos and a small but steep set at the entrance and both my parent and his think this isn't suitable as we will have at least six kids under 4.

Thing is, every venue we've seen has stairs or something unsuitable and I'm getting a bit annoyed because I feel like we can't please everyone.

Side note, my dc will be 2 at the wedding and I am not particularly worried about the stairs.

AIBU to expect parents to watch their own children at a wedding or should I be looking for a different venue? What did you do?

[Ilovecaindingle]

Guests will be expected to supervise their own kids. . Have your wedding where you want it . maybe keeping the parents in the dark about some arrangements is the way to keep your stress levels down too!!

[EssentialHummus]

Guests will be expected to supervise their own kids.

Exactly. You need to please yourself and your prospective DH on the day; within reason, everyone else who wants to join you on your special day will cope. Stairs up to the venue and to the loo are completely manageable.

[AbbeyRoadCrossing]

I'd just choose a venue you and your DP like. Stairs are a fairly normal thing to have in a building.
I have two toddlers and would supervise at a wedding or anywhere else we go. Stairs aren't an issue unless you've got guests that need disabled access and there isn't any?

[29redshoes]

I only considered stairs for the elderly guests, the toddlers didn't even cross my mind!

Admittedly I wasn't a parent back then, but I am now and I wouldn't think twice about stairs at a wedding venue.

[Sidge]

I would only rule a place out because of stairs if I had some wheelchair-using guests planned or a very immobile/frail relative or friend coming, and there was no alternative access.

Toddlers are the responsibility of their parents. I certainly wouldn't be ruling out a venue because of the likelihood of children being unable to manage stairs safely.

[YouJumpIJumpJack]

Thanks, just making sure I wasn't turning bridezilla!

[DonaldFlump]

they're toddlers, not Daleks.

[downwardfacingdog]

I got married in a castle with high wall, drops, uneven steps etc. We had several young children/toddlers at the wedding. It didn't cross my mind. I expected parents to supervise their own DC as I have when mine have come to weddings. It's hard enough to find a venue as it is yanbu!

[harderandharder2breathe]

Yanbu if toddlers are the only concern

If it was for an elderly relative it would be kind to make sure there was disabled access and a disabled toilet etc

But for toddlers, they are the responsibility of their parents, who need to supervise them and can carry them up and down steps if necessary

[MrsBlennerhassett]

YANBU i have a toddle and i would never expect someone to pick a wedding venue without steps for me! At my own wedding there was a steep flight of stairs, it was also next to a river and in the middle of the wilderness. My son was fine because he was being supervised as will all the kids at your wedding! I agree with pp perhaps dont share so much detail with your family as it will add stress. x