Bus driver tried to refuse my bus pass

[EIsbethTascioni]

And pretty much called me a liar.

I have a free bus pass because the DVLA took my driving licence back due to my Bipolar diagnosis and suicide attempts.

The only photo I had shows me with shorter blonde hair, my hair is now long and purple. So that's what's n my pass (don't know if this is relevant).

I got on the bus and pinged my pass. The driver looked at me and then asked to see it. He squinted at the photo (it's very obviously me despite the hair) and then asked me why I had it. I got a bit flustered and said something about being entitled to it. He asked why. I said because I'm ill. He said 'well, you don't look ill'. This was the point at which I burst into tears. There was a queue forming at this point and he just waved me on.

I'm now sitting on the bus red faced and upset.

Are they even allowed to ask why you have a disability pass? I was mortified, I didn't want to explain my diagnosis in front of a bus load of people and surely he should know that many illnesses/disabilities are invisible?

I'm not going to make a complaint, I don't have it in me. But I needed to vent a bit.

Aibu?

[PotteringAlong]

No, you're not

[Cluedough]

You should complain. He had no right to do that.

You don't need to call. An email will do and is no different to typing it out here.

[AmeliaJack]

That sounds very upsetting. I'm so sorry.

I understand you don't feel able to call them but what about an email? Just set out very formally and briefly what happened.

Alternatively do you have a friend/family member that can complain on your behalf?

[brokenheartdog]

Please complain.
They aren't allowed to ask its not a bus drivers place to assess whether you need a disability pass or such.

[EIsbethTascioni]

I might email later. Somewhat ironically I'm at therapy for the next few hours so won't be able to update until later.

[StopTalkingOverMe]

If you can, copy and paste your OP and send it in an email. The driver was definitely in the wrong

[brokenheartdog]

Can you tweet or Facebook them?

[RiversrunWoodville]

Bloody hell Elsbeth YADNBU sorry the driver was an arse all he had to do if he was in doubt it was your pass was look closely at the photo then wave you on, I don't think he should have asked why you had it or made you feel like that

[ItsAllGoingToBeFine]

TBF are you sure the photo was obviously you? Where I am you get a lot of people trying to ride on someone elses pass - it's possible he was trying to verify that you were the pass holder in a really cack-handed sort of way.

[SapphireStrange]

Driver was a twat. 'well, you don't look ill'.

Please do complain. You can pretty much copy and paste your OP, with a few small tweaks. People shouldn't get away with this.

[Awwlookatmybabyspider]

Please complain. This fucking power tripping prick has probably done this dozens of times, and got away with it.

[Awwlookatmybabyspider]

Because we're a Nation of non complainers. If he does get into trouble. Let it be a lesson not to pick on or target vulnerable people.

[NarkyMcDinkyChops]

his fucking power tripping prick has probably done this dozens of times, and got away with it

Or more likely he's got into trouble for accepting so many fake disability passes. You'd be amazed how many are circulating.
Yes, he was wrong. No need for people to be dicks about it though.

[MrsJayy]

Oh no how horrible for you please email the bus company to complain how dare the driver question you like that.

[sycamore54321]

I assume he meant why do you have the pass of what, at first glance, appeared to be another person. Long purple hair sounds like a pretty defining feature and if he glanced at the photo and didn't see this, then he had reasonable grounds for assuming at first glance the pass wasn't yours.

[Andbabymakesthree]

Every right to check the pass isn't a duff one. No right to quiz you why issued etc. Report him.

[shovetheholly]

Please complain, if only to ensure others in your position aren't treated the same way.

What an awful twat that driver is.

[MrsJayy]

Myown photo is 10 years old i look different he asked the op why she had the pass not that it didn't look like her then he dug deeper asking more questions then said she didn't look ill. What right does a bus driver or anybody to say well you don't look ill.

[RhodaBorrocks]

Complain. If he'd said the photo didn't look like you that's one thing, but he questioned why you needed the pass and then said you don't look ill. That is discrimnatory.

Email, tweet and Facebook. I did that after an Arriva bus driver abused me for parking in a disabled spot - he saw me whilst he was in queuing traffic next to where I'd parked and yelled I didn't look ill and I couldn't park there. When we flashed my badge and told him that mind his own business, he told us to mind our own business, lol! Arriva got a strongly worded complaint that one of their drivers had verbally abused a car containing a disabled person, and oap and an autistic child. Said driver was sent for diversity retraining.

[SapphireStrange]

Long purple hair sounds like a pretty defining feature

That is easily changed. I think he needs more adequate training in order to be able to handle identifying passengers when they've had a haircut.

And even if he DID have the right to question it, no fucker has the right to say 'well, you don't look ill.' Again, a training issue perhaps.

[Awwlookatmybabyspider]

WELL YOU DONT LOOK ILL.
Cheeky fucking TWAT. Mental illness doesn't have a face.
Atos would love him. !!!!!!

[OlennasWimple]

Are you completely certain that the photo looks like you? It's pretty common to try to use passes fraudulently, and drivers are supposed to check that they are being used properly rather than just wave them on. You might want to think about getting your photo updated to avoid problems in the future (or go back to the purple hair - sounds fab!)

But he had no right to ask you why you had one, or comment on whether you look ill and you should complain about this bit of the conversation

[wettunwindee]

You looked nothing like the bus pass. I'm sure he could have questioned you a little differently but what do you want to get from contacting the company?

1. a worthless platitude if you do so vaguely anonymously.
   

1. the driver getting in trouble if you really go for it, giving times and routes etc.
   

1. a cathartic exercise.
   

1 seems like a waste of time, 2 a little over the top and 3, well, isn't that what you're getting now?

You need to work on your "are you going to let me on, or not" with an accompanying 'I'm-going-to-give-you-time-to-think-about-the-options-here-and-hope-for-your-sake-you-make-the-correct-choice stare straight through them. Easier said than done but it's a look worth perfecting.

Glad you're getting help. I see why you're upset. I know what you're going through. Even being on the way to therapy can make people extremely emotional and that's ignoring he cause of them going in the first place. In reality, this isn't such a terrible thing.

[Miserylovescompany2]

It's none of the drivers business why you have been issued a Concessionary bus pass. Disabilities come in many forms and some are NOT visable.

I would make an official complaint. If you google the bus company the complaints procedure should be on their website. Or, alternatively, if the service is run by the local authority? You should be able to complain directly to them.

I'm so sorry you've had to deal with a complete in sensitive twit. People change their hairstyles colour often, are you supposed to send away for a new pass everytime you fancy a change?

I hope this horrible experience hasn't put you completely off using the bus and you manage to get out and about without fearing "question time" or having to stand and justify yourself.

[TheSnorkMaidenReturns]

Driver definitely needs more training - if you can identify route and time and therefore driver, I would contact the bus company. He should not be questioning why you have the pass but is right to check that it is you if your hair looks very different.