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my husband doesn't act like he gives a shit

(3 Posts)
punkpuffin Thu 12-Jan-17 22:25:18

Sorry I'm in the need for a bit of a rant. Dh is loving and caring in some ways but completely dense in others and it's starting to drive me mad! He had a tough childhood and started counselling last week. The counsellor told him he lacked empathy and she would work on it with him. Obviously I understand it will take time and I know have my faults, I'm receiving counselling for pnd. He's a wonderful dad even if he sometimes goes about it the wrong way as he didn't have a good role model as a child. Sometimes he's a loving husband, when we met he was very affectionate and romantic. Now he couldn't be romantic if his life depended on it. He puts his needs first, buying things he wants (gadgets etc) when we are saving for a house. He lost my Christmas present and found it a week after Christmas crumpled up in the boot of his car (having bought any old tat on the 23rd). Our relationship took a massive hit over Christmas and I tried to kick him out but he begged for a chance to prove himself. He just doesn't seem to be trying very hard. Today I saw an ad about an unpaid position in an interesting sounding job that could lead to a pair possition. I'm a sahm at the moment as child care costs would mean id lose 2/3 of my wage so I didn't go back after mat leave. I text dh to say I was interested in giving them a ring as it's only 2 hours on a Friday at a time dh doesn't work. I wanted his opinion on whether he thought it was a good idea and all he replied was "yea whatever". AIBU to feel completely unappreciated and crap?

Sorry about the long rant

refusetobeasheep Thu 12-Jan-17 22:30:23

Go for the job! Sounds great. No advice on your relationship, except focus on you. E.g. With the job and you're likely to feel stronger.

mylittlephoney Thu 12-Jan-17 22:33:41

My dh did the same after therapy. Went from a caring man to one who only cared about himself. If i could get hold of his therapist id strangle her. It's good he got his dad issues out after 40 years of being burdened by them. But he's changed as a person and I want the man I fell in love with back.
You feel unapreciated and unloved because he's turned into a selfish arse. I'm sorry your going through this. I get it. If it's any concelation dh is just starting to be a tiny bit more himself again 3 years later.
Sorry I can't say more my battery is about to die.

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