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AIBU about 'advice' which is/may be wrong?

(18 Posts)
flightywoman Wed 28-Dec-16 11:28:27

I've noticed very often that someone will post a situation and at some point in the comments there will be "I believe it's blah" or "I think it's xyz, you'll need to check"

I understand wanting to be helpful or whatever, but why not check what you're saying? It seems to happen quite a lot with property and law. "I believe you can claim to be married after a year and a day". NO! Common-law marriage hasn't existed for CENTURIES. You might believe it, but it isn't true!

Instead of posting something that you don't even know, why not check it yourself first, you could even post the link as supporting information!

Is it me?

caroldecker Wed 28-Dec-16 11:34:22

People don't check facts they think they know. They may well be ill-informed, but they are not guessing.

CaraAspen Wed 28-Dec-16 11:36:04

They like the attention. That's why they don't do the research.

SheldonsSpot Wed 28-Dec-16 11:36:30

It's the nature of the internet though - there are loads of armchair lawyers, GP's and psychiatrists on here - I've lost count of the amount of times I've seen someone's relatives diagnosed with a personality disorder based on one paragraph of information from the OP. grin

LucyFuckingPevensie Wed 28-Dec-16 11:39:12

Well, by that reasoning surely the person asking should just do their research themselves.
I think it's because some people just see this as a chat forum and chat here as they would in a conversation in rl. Where you wouldn't research and provide evidence on something you heard that may or may not be true before saying it.

Bambamrubblesmum Wed 28-Dec-16 11:40:16

I've seen someone's relatives diagnosed with a personality disorder based on one paragraph of information from the OP.

I thought that was the MN default position. If you don't like someone or they don't warm to you they are instantly a 'narc' or have some personality disorder, because the OP couldn't possibly be wrong or adding to the situation confused

VladmirsPoutine Wed 28-Dec-16 11:41:08

It's a chat forum not a meeting of journal scientific researchers.
The onus is really on the person on the receiving end to look into it further.

Elphame Wed 28-Dec-16 11:46:14

I know why - I do it myself.

Even if I'm sure I know that people read what they want to read, they believe what they want to believe and accept random advice from a complete stranger on the internet often unquestioningly.

Telling people to check for themselves, having given them a hefty shove in the right direction, absolves me as far as is possible from any moral responsibility for an error based on the asker having left out a vital piece of information or an innocent misinterpretation.

caroldecker Wed 28-Dec-16 11:47:07

FWIW, Scotland only abandoned marriage 'by habit and repute' in 2006. It appears (i am not a lawyer), that such marriages in place at that time are still valid. here

Case law discussion from up to 2005

perhaps the OP should check 'facts' before posting.

myoriginal3 Wed 28-Dec-16 11:49:28

smile

PurpleMinionMummy Wed 28-Dec-16 11:55:26

Sometimes checking might take a while and you might not have time, but signposting the op might help point them in the right direction to find out themselves.

Although you might be 99.9% certain you are right, you'd hate to advise someone wrongly and they take it as gospel and it messes stuff up for them.

If we should check it ourselves first, you could also say OP should just look into it themselves instead of asking?

flightywoman Wed 28-Dec-16 12:08:23

I take your point caroldecker! Though English law and Scottish law are different...and I wasn't clear that I was speaking about English law in that context.

What elphame says above is interesting - thank you!

WicksEnd Wed 28-Dec-16 12:08:59

I've never ever seen anyone on MN claim that you're classed as married after cohabiting for a year and a day. I've never even heard of that particular myth.
I've only ever seen posts saying the complete opposite, advocating marriage as a way of protecting rights.
I'm not saying all advice given is correct, it's not but I do feel there's a lot of good advice ano info.

Trills Wed 28-Dec-16 12:22:55

Most of the time the really bad advice is not caveated.

People who are very wrong and are certain that they are not wrong are more common than people who are unsure.

They say

It is X

not

It might be X, try googling Y

(it's not X)

lovelearning Wed 28-Dec-16 15:09:49

The only sure way to avoid making mistakes is to have no new ideas.

- Albert Einstein.

Toddlerteaplease Wed 28-Dec-16 15:52:31

Where is the thread that I spotted overnight about mumsnet advice that is wrong. Can't find it anywhere?

WorraLiberty Wed 28-Dec-16 15:57:03

Instead of posting something that you don't even know, why not check it yourself first, you could even post the link as supporting information!

Yeah but then why doesn't the OP do it in the first place?

Saves starting a thread fgrin

flightywoman Wed 28-Dec-16 17:27:04

Oh Worra! wink

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