TEA SLURPER IN THE OFFICE

[FV45]

OMG.....

I mostly work from home, but have come to campus today.
Fairly new colleague is slurping her tea in a very, very quiet office.

How can she be so unaware?

AIBU to kill her?

[FriendofBill]

YABU
Tea tastes better when slurped

[CaraAspen]

Go for the jugular. That is just revolting!!!

Argh

[MaisieDotes]

Shout "SLURP ALERT!" and when she looks up in alarm follow with "STOP THAT INSTANTLY".

Direct and effective.

[EssentialHummus]

DH does this. Apparently it's acceptable in Russia. Screw you, Russia.

[xStefx]

Next time she does it say "whats that noise" and when she looks up say "oh gosh was that you slurping your tea" she might be a little quieter then

[FooFighter99]

Hahaha Maisie nothing like the direct approach!

If you mostly work from home anyway, try not to let it bother you or inadvertently create an atmosphere in the office on the odd time you are actually there... it's just not worth it.

Alternatively, you could (jokingly) ask her if she has a hole in her lip...

[OohMavis]

Tea tastes better slurped.

Like wine.

[TallyHoAndToodlePip]

'Unaware' is a slurper/ lip-smacker/ chews with mouth open/ talks while eating persons middle name!!

Whatever you do don't imitate them back in a really exaggerated and annoyed way to their face as that does not help them realise the error of their ways and only gets you in trouble. Taking them out may be the kindest option for everyone...

[FV45]

Foo I thought venting on here (and getting some laughs) would be a good approach.

Essential She's French. Is it acceptable there?

She's gone to a meeting.

I do realise I can never work with people again, I am far to set in my ways!

[Footinmouthasusual]

God my dad is a slurper and thinks nothing of telling you long stories while he is chewing. He also bites a biscuit and then slurps a huge gulp of tea and kind of gargles it all around his gob

French you say aye! Dads a yank so no idea

[FooFighter99]

Sorry FV45 I didn't mean to be so serious!

We have a woman in our office who laughs like a hyena and it properly gets on my nerves!!! Thank god she's leaving this week

[Daisyfrumps]

Ha! Do it louder - have a slurp-off

[wasonthelist]

KILL KILL KILL

[EssentialHummus]

She's French. Is it acceptable there?

Sorry OP, I'm only up to date on slurping in Eastern Europe, the Caucuses and New Zealand all slurping wankers. You'll have to lure a native in to confirm the French situation.

[Niggit]

"Does that tea have a volume control?"

[BringMeTea]

You have my full sympathy OP. I think the; 'What's that horrible noise?' would be fair enough. If that fails, kill her.

[PommePoire]

There is a nice expression in French that might do here.

"mais c'est comme le petit Jésus en culotte de velours"

You would say this after taking your first sip of a delicious drink, to convey the idea that it slips down the throat nicely. (No sniggering at the back!)

It literally translates as:

"but it's a smooth as the baby Jesus in velvet underwear!"

You could try modelling good tea sipping etiquette and then exclaiming this phrase?

[ButteredToastAndStrawberryJam]

I used to work with a man that swilled it around his mouth, yuk.

[Falalalafffffffttt]

Oh dear. I came on worried that you were talking about me. I slurp. I can't help it, I have tried not to but I end up spilling it down myself.

[dollydaydream114]

Tea slurping doesn't annoy me but when people chew gum in the office - or anywhere, really - it drives me INSANE.

I swear to god I have some sort of special hearing ability that makes chewing gum audible to me from distances of about 100ft away. It makes me irrationally furious for some reason.

Also the fake mint smell makes me feel sick.

[Scottishchick39]

My workmate gulps down sparkling water, and I mean really GULPS. It makes my blood boil. Saying that, the cat cleaning herself makes my blood boil too, slurp, slurp, slurp! Grrrr!

[Chipscheesentomatosauce]

I worked with a woman recently who made every single noise imaginable while eating. Slurping, smacking, gulping, aahing. And THEN, she'd sick and suck it all out her teeth for ages after. She ate and drank a lot (a "grazer", a term I cannot stand) and I still don't know how I didn't end up escorted out the office with her blood on my hands.

[Chipscheesentomatosauce]

*sit, not sick! Though I wasn't far off it!

[FV45]

Back at home where I belong now. Too cold to go into my garden office so I am doing the last 1/2hr work sitting on my bean bag chair with my lovely Christmas tree in the corner.

I didn't kill her, I even wished her a happy Christmas!

my car park space was blocked, but that's a whole other thread!