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AIBU to be so ungrateful?

(9 Posts)
CreativeBee Tue 29-Nov-16 11:38:04

Ok so I know I am but really need to vent so here goes. Today is my birthday, I feel crap to put it lightly and I don't even think I know why. Both my DC (DS 16 & DD 10 are off because they're feeling poorly, although they don't look ill). I got messages from my siblings that I didn't even think would bother (we're not that close) so that made me wonder about their motive (where there most probably isn't a motive just well wishes), my hubby (who is a tech phobe) sent me a Facebook wish and I got really emotional and somewhat upset as it wasn't heartfelt (ok romantic, he's no good with words) but what got to me was he asked me to check it before he posted it so I felt like it was false. Then he asked if I wanted Birthday sex, we haven't done it for a week due to stress of other things and I hit the roof. I told him that all he ever thinks about is how he can get into my pants and why can't he just be more affectionate. Anyways I ended up crying and he felt crap about himself (which made me feel even more crap). He did make me breakfast and sort the DC (he's not at work today) but now there's a tension in the house, even though I have apologised. My DS didn't even bother to wish me happy birthday! I just feel so crap and I know I should be grateful but finding it really hard, I lost my job earlier this year and although I'm loving staying at home I feel like I've failed but I should be thinking about my achievements but can't see anything significant that makes me feel that not all is bad. And breathe... just needed to rant sad

RichardBucket Tue 29-Nov-16 11:40:08

Ungrateful for what? A Facebook message? No, you're not ungrateful!

It's very shit that your kids haven't even acknowledged your birthday. Are birthdays generally a big deal in your house? Has anybody bought you a card or present?

Happy birthday! flowers cake

CreativeBee Tue 29-Nov-16 11:46:52

I make a huge deal about everyone's birthday in this house, special breakfast, cards and presents with a special meal and cake. I have t had anything so far besides the breakfast, my 10 year old DD wished me happy Birthday which was so sweet but I don't know if my expectations were just too much today. Maybe be grateful I have a family around me, I guess I could have been sat here on my todd lol

user1471950254 Tue 29-Nov-16 11:48:07

YANBU! Your partner & kids should all have wished you s happy birthday & I would expect cards/gifts. Unless it's the norm in your household to present cards at dinner tonight? I hope they surprise you this evening with a lovely meal..... do not cook!

mummytime Tue 29-Nov-16 11:58:01

YANBU - I am very sorry that the rest of your family are being so unreasonable. Yes teens can be a bit selfish sometimes but thats why your DH should have you back and make sure he and they show their appreciation for all you do and are.
Your wider family- well even if you aren't close - sending a few birthday wishes is something I do to even pretty vague facebook friends. So I think they are just doing at least the baseline of celebrating your birthday.


StefCWS Tue 29-Nov-16 12:05:20

aw bless you, every year I also make sure my partner and daughter are spoilt each year and every year I get the same flowers, chocolates and smellies (which im allergic to). Honest now, im not trying to sound ungreatful but I really wanted chanel no 5 this year for my birthday and dropped a million hints!!! Nope.. thankgod for my mother who always picks up my hints. What im getting at though is that my man Is lovely and dependable and trustworthy, as long as you have a fab man dnt worry about gifts, he may just be crap at that kind of thing. xx Happy birthday from me :-)

RB68 Tue 29-Nov-16 12:22:37

pub lunch - kids are old enough to leave home alone for an hour or so

I so get this - mine feel lost trying to organsie themselves but at least now DD 11 tries by herself generally

BasicMadeira Tue 29-Nov-16 13:23:09

If your DH is at home today and the sick children are to get dressed and go out. Go wherever you fancy and can affford, nice lunch, pedicure, potter about a museum, lovely coffee whatever. More effort should have been made by others yes but the most important person to value yourself is you!

Farmmummy Tue 29-Nov-16 13:33:38

Happy birthday from me Creative! It isn't the same but it is heartfelt

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