to squirrel it away

[frugalprincess]

I think I'm starting to annoy my DH with my worrying about money. Does anyone else worry that they'll be made redundant or worry that they'll have a HUGE unexpected repair bill on the house and, as a result, live on a tiny budget as they put money in savings that they're then scared to touch?

My husband thinks I'm a bit bonkers tbh. We both work full time and split the bills equally but save separately. Works for us...but I have a constant worry that we'll suddenly be left penniless.

[ImprovingMyMH]

Well, yes, it makes sense to have a reasonable contingency fund. I think ~6 months of living expenses is considered a good idea. It depends on how much your saving is impacting on your day to day life though I suppose.

[pipsqueak25]

everyone should have an emergency fund and not just for buying chocolate either !

[JellyBelli]

Squirrel it away. If it wasnt for my emergency stash we would have lost our home 2 years ago. We are just getting back on our feet.
Now DDIL has been made redundant and offered her old job back on part time hours . She has been in the same job for years, we never saw this one coming.

[MoMandaS]

My DH is like this. I've just read him your post and he said, "you might think it's bonkers; I think it's just good planning". And I know he's right. I also know he worries about it more than he lets on, but I'm not sure why - neither of his parents are particularly profligate and he's never been short of money himself (because he's been careful). I should point out he's not mean or ungenerous either. I do sometimes wonder if it's a result of a childhood that was otherwise insecure in terms of predictability, parental involvement, that sort of thing, that has manifested itself in a need for a more tangible sense of security, if that makes sense!

[frugalprincess]

jelly I'm glad to hear you're getting back on your feet and I hope your DDIL is ok. What you've just described sounds awful. I'm glad I have a contingency now. I'll keep squirrelling!!

[frugalprincess]

momanda got yourself a good DH there!!

[mygorgeousmilo]

I am very squirrelly. But I squirrel first and am then generous with whatever I've left myself with, I can't stand meanness at all, and my husband is relaxed and generous, too. When people say "I can't, I'm skint, I've got a fiver in my bank" it makes me feel ill! To me having no money means what I have to spend is low, but my threshold of saved money has not been dipped into. I am like this with food and supplies too, I buy things way in advance, and stock up a lot. I think it does relate to what PP have said about having an insecure childhood, lack of parental interest and being alone a lot. I always make sure my kids know what's for dinner, they're not fussy or anything at all, I just tell them if I know, so they know in advance that there will be some dinner. Although I guess they are secure with it by now, there has never not been dinner! Reading that back is quite sad! A couple of years ago my husband had an accident at work and was injured and sacked (legal minefield) and if it wasn't for my savings, we would have been genuinely destitute. I say this realising some people are struggling to make ends meet and cannot save. I am saving my horror for people that could save, but choose not to. Again, I understand in certain circumstances having no food in the house, but if I can afford it, I will have a tonne of ingredients in the house, cupboard/freezer - just in case we were all of a sudden thrown into financial hardship. I logically can't see it happening but the fear is there.

[FleurThomas]

I'm the same. Grew up dirt poor and pay 3 quarters of my gross income into savings that I then won't touch. Remaining goes on bills and I have a strict budge of £100/mth for me. It's not unreasonable to me. I'd be more stressed out if I couldn't save.

[SillySongsWithLarry]

I'm a saver too. I spent 10 years in debt and using every penny of disposable income to pay the debts. Now I'm debt free (other than the mortgage) and I'm using the extra money to save. I'll have the house paid off before the children are grown then I'll hopefully be in a good position to help them enter a secure adulthood.

[HeddaGarbled]

It's about balance. It's a miserable life if you squirrel it all away and never have new clothes or meals out or holidays or just the occasional treat but equally it's foolish to spend it all on fun stuff and not save for the future or contingency funds. This is actually one of the major causes of arguments between couples. It's really not unusual to have different attitudes to this. Compromise is the key to a successful relationship in this as in all things. Keep your contingency saving but don't deprive yourselves of some reasonable fun and pleasure spending.