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AIBU?

to get your advice on my sons speech

35 replies

Nooneyouwilleverknow · 28/10/2016 21:55

My son is 2y9month and knows quite alot of words but he is not really speaking fluently.

So for example he will say "mummy. need. a. driiiink" so every word is seperate if you see what i mean. Alot of words he has he cannot pronounce properly which at his age i wouldnt expect but im the only one who understands 90% of what he says. I try and speak skowly to him and try and break things down he really trys but its like hes mouth wont do it.

AIBU to think maybe i need to speak to HV or am i over reacting?

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MommaGee · 29/10/2016 01:24

I suspect you're worrying over something that isn't a huge issue but if you're worried then speak to someone

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crazywriter · 29/10/2016 03:53

YWBU to speak to your HV if you're worried. That's what HVs are for. Our DD was similar with her speech although missed out most words so got some speech therapy. She's still behind others in her year but were getting there. Talking to the HV helped a lot and made me realise it wasn't as bad as I initially thought. We just didn't have the right skills to help her develop. Now we're better at it.

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WooWooChooChoo · 29/10/2016 04:18

My son had speech problems and needed speech therapy. Did the health visitor notice anything at his two year check? I think they are supposed to be able to say about fifty understandable words by then (I could only understand about three of my son's).

Is he in a nursery or preschool yet? They might also be able to tell if it is anything worth being concerned about.

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MsJamieFraser · 29/10/2016 04:37

Ask the GP or HV for advice, we ds2 has acute speech and language issues, he used to speak from the back of his throat with his tongue rolled, when started school it was a huge issue not only affecting his confidence but also his social skills. The school has a wonderful teacher who done S&L with him, he also attended NHS S&L 3 x weekly for 8 week periods and then a 6 week break between these, however during these breaks we paid privately for S&L play therapy, we done this for 2.5 years, he's now been signed of for 6 monthly check ups Grin

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sdaisy26 · 29/10/2016 08:16

It's worth talking to someone if you're worried. Not much is done re s&l until 3 but it can help to be in the system prior to that point, in terms of accessing support faster.

The talking point . Org website is really useful and has progress checks so you can get an idea of what is 'expected'.

www.talkingpoint.org.uk

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Nooneyouwilleverknow · 29/10/2016 08:34

The HV said st his two year check up that she would check up in three months how his speech was doing but she never did. I didnt chase at the time because he had starting saying more words.

He just doesnt seem to have developed since its like he stuck where he is. He starts school nursery after easter holidays and he will need to progress alot by then in order for teachers to understand what hes saying.

Think i will give them a ring on Monday see if they can advise me unfortunately i dont have much confidence in them supporting me.

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Wendalicious · 29/10/2016 09:54

It's worth asking, my son has delayed speech and turns out he has glue ear and couldn't actually hear!! Waiting for grommets x

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crazywriter · 29/10/2016 10:41

Sorry it was late.last night when typing. I meant YWNBU to speak to your HV.

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HalloToJasonIsaacs · 29/10/2016 10:44

I second getting his hearing checked professionally - a huge number of children with speech problems actually have a hearing problem and it's surprisingly difficult for parents to notice so you should always rule that out first.

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originalusernamefail · 29/10/2016 10:46

My son is currently non verbal and awaiting an assessment for ASD so the case is a little different. I have found you have to fight and chase for every follow-up. I would contact the HV again. I accessed SALT drop in clinics via the children's centre, it may be worth seeing if they have something like that in your area?

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littleducks · 29/10/2016 10:48
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Redkite10a · 29/10/2016 10:56

When I spoke to my HV about my 18 month old son's speech in June, I was told to go to this website and do the progress checkerwww.talkingpoint.org.uk . We filled it in and it said DS needed to see a therapist. In our area you can self refer after doing the progress checker. I found I was taken more seriously once I'd filled it in, I think it was felt to be more objective.

I don't know what your area is like but it might be worth doing before you call the HV?

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Velvian · 29/10/2016 11:02

I tried to get help for my DD when she was about your son's age. HV said she no longer met the the criteria for help so I made a referral myself to the Speech & language centre (there is an acronym that I can't remember). They agreed that her speech seemed behind, but also said the criteria for their service had tightened. DD's speech is good now, but her reading and writing is taking a long time to establish (she will be 6 in Jan) & her confidence in social situations is quite low.
Ask for help and go priveted if you can afford it if no help is offered. It is such a false economy not to offer speech therapy to toddlers that are struggling.

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Matildatoldsuchdreadfullies · 29/10/2016 11:09

I agree with all the PPs who've said talk to your HV. FWIW in our area no referral is made for SALT until the child has a hearing test.

But just for reassurance, OP, 3 out of 4 of my dc needed speech therapy - and they were far more delayed than your ds - and today they have no communication issues of any kind.

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Matildatoldsuchdreadfullies · 29/10/2016 11:11

I'd just add - don't accept group therapy. It's a complete waste of time (sorry to any SALTs out there). Hang on for individual sessions even if this means waiting for a few months.

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2kids2dogsnosense · 29/10/2016 11:24

Speak to your GP expressing your concerns and ask for a referral for Speech and Language Therapy.

I am a retired SaLT myself, but don't want to offer any advice other than that because I can neither hear your son, nor examine his speech apparatus so I can't say anything more than others are suggesting. (And I specialised speech after stroke and head injury, so am stretching into the far reaches of my memory - but communication is too important to leave to chance. Also if you get anxious, he will pick up on it and it will make him anxious, too.)

In my experience HVs are rubbish at anything to do with speech and language unless there is an obvious autism (Just don't get me started. No. Really. Don't.) and the tiny example you have given suggests that you have nothing to worry about on that score.

As Wenda says, it could well be a hearing problem (HVs are useless at picking these up, too - the distraction test they use is a complete waste of time.) Or it may be that he has a small tongue tie or even a palatal cleft (some are tiny - just a minute hole in the hard palate, but it is enough to make free and easy speech difficult).

Has he any problems (now or in the past) with eating and/or drinking? Is he able to "pucker up" for a kiss? these will give some clues as to how his speech apparatus is developing.

He is likely to cope when he gets to nursery, but he really needs to be sorted out before primary school, and although some problems "grow"out, many e.g. lisps, don't (not suggesting that he has a lisp BTW).

Velvain
HV said she no longer met the the criteria for help
Frankly, I have never heard such shite - but it doesn't surprise me. HVs aren't the most helpful individuals in my experience. You are right to suggest private therapy if you can afford it. Speech and Language are incredibly important, for, as you so rightly say, social acceptance and confidence as well as daily communication. And the older a child gets before any difficulties are sorted, then the more likely s/he is to be teased and bullied, and then they won't want to talk.

I would like to point out to everyone who will be complaining about me HV bashing, that I am speaking from my own experience, and that of friends who are still working, many of whom work in paediatric SLT, and that despite what you may think, no Health Visitors were harmed in the making of this post.

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mouthandfoot · 29/10/2016 11:26

My son is 4 in January and his speech is quite poor. His vocabulary seems quite good but his prononciation is poor. We have been to the speech therapist and they did tests to make sure he didn't have learning difficulties which they confirmed not but they say its too young to begin speech therapy until they are 4.

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2kids2dogsnosense · 29/10/2016 12:44

Mouthandfoot

There's therapy and therapy.

The SaLT would check that he has mastered the expected sounds in the expected order, and would also check that there is no obvious physical reason for the delay (especially if it is pronunciation), Usually she (almost always a woman, so forgive me this) will give parents reassurance and advice on games to play to elicit particular sounds from the child. And re: no therapy before 4 - I was a clinical educator in a university, and the paediatric clinic certainly did therapy with children under that age - anything from 18 months, depending upon the problem. So did our NHS community therapy department. I think it depends what your particular trust is abe to offer.

There is a huge demand for speech and language therapy, and it is very much the Cinderella of the therapies because most people (including health professionals) don't appreciate the long-term repercussions of poor communication.

However if she didn't give you any suggestions as to what to practice with him until he is of an age that they can offer therapy, then I doubt that she is very worried. It may be that she feels that his speech apparatus just needs to mature a little and things will right themselves, Here in our trust we made a point of getting children as fluent as possible before they started school.

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Scaredycat3000 · 29/10/2016 14:08

Both my sons were quickly referred to SALT soon after starting their free nursery places by staff in totally different parts of the country. I still don't quite get why, but that is probably part of the reason/problem. I had read on MN if offered take, if you're wrong (which I would have been) the delay will compound the problem. They only work on some of the sounds, as many sounds very young children are not ready for. Some sounds can't be made until something like 5. Now DS2, just turned 5 with a good years SALT, is talking so much better he can talk sometimes as you describe your DC as he is concentrating hard to talk properly. It's such a joy to see how clear speech has filled him with confidence and so a much happier little boy.

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littleducks · 29/10/2016 14:16

I would disagree that you should refuse group therapy. I'm also a speech and language therapist. We treat a wide range of difficulties for some problems 1:1 therapy is by far the best for others group therapy is equal to 1:1 and for some group therapy better. It isn't a one sized fits all approach.

In some areas declining therapy offered (egg groups ) would just mean you got less therapy not mean you just had a longer wait.

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2kids2dogsnosense · 29/10/2016 15:39

Agree with littleducks Group therapy is often the way to go - don't turn it down if that's what's offered.

It allows a non-fluent child to socialise with other children as well as having their problem addressed.

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crazywriter · 04/11/2016 03:18

I agree with not turning down group therapy. We found that the more our DD interacted with others her own age, the more her speech came on. Other skills came on thanks to being with others the same age. some children just need to see their peers do the thing you've been trying to get them to do.

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DuckWaddle · 04/11/2016 04:23

There's usually a local drop in speech therapy assessment you can go to without an appt. I would do that and gauge their opinion. I personally think (if required) it's the perfect age to start therapy- we did with my dd and it was a huge help. sALT has been amazing for us- but we went privately (wait so long on NHS in our area) so I can only comment on that.
Communication is key to so much in terms of learning and communication so don't feel 'silly' if you just want to heck it out

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DuckWaddle · 04/11/2016 04:26

I meant socially and checked at the end there! Sleep deprivation!

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NotYoda · 04/11/2016 05:17

Your son is stringing words together but not fluently with the right intonation?

This was like DS1. His speech was a bit robotic with funny rising intonation at the end (not Australian!)

I always assumed there was nothing to worry about. And in our case, there wasn't

No harm in asking though

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