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To never go out of my way for her again - SIL

(7 Posts)
BooeyBubbleHead Tue 25-Oct-16 22:35:38

SIL is quite immature & self focussed. Big age gap between her & DH and by all accounts has been indulged. She comes across as very entitled, though she has some lovely qualities too and I don't dislike her.

When she was expecting her first child, she asked if she could borrow several items that DD had outgrown - furniture, crib etc. I was reluctant as intended to reuse when we had second child & wanted to keep it all "nice". DH talked me round though, so we made the 200+ mile round trip to drop everything to her.

Fast forward a couple of years and I am now expecting my second baby. Furniture came up in a conversation with MIL, so I mentioned that we would be asking SIL to return what we had loaned her. MIL broke the news that when SIL moved out of family home to set up with her new man, she left all of our furniture behind and it would be uncomfortable for her to deal with getting it back as she and exBIL are not on good terms (she cheated on him). Her suggestion was that we liaise directly with exBIL to get everything back.

AIBU to be pissed off that we now have to organise the return of our belongings and more than likely make the huge trip again to collect it all, without so much as a thank you, or an apology for our inconvenience, While SIL is shielded by MIL from even having to discuss it with us?

nephrofox Tue 25-Oct-16 22:40:50

Not unreasonable to be pissed off.

Would be unreasonable to indulge her again.

See what BIL says, he probably agrees she's a pain !

Winniethepooer Tue 25-Oct-16 22:44:16

Why are you talking to tour Mil about this?

Call your Sil & let her know you expect the items to be returned to you by a set date.

amy85 Tue 25-Oct-16 22:47:31

Just because your mil told you to talk to ex bill directly doesn't mean you have to...I'd still ask silver directly as she is the one you lent it too...yes you may still end up having to talk to ex bill to arrange getting it back but least she isn't being shielded from The convo

BooeyBubbleHead Tue 25-Oct-16 22:52:03

Very good question Winnie! DH doesn't want to "cause a fuss" hmm and says as long as we get it all back, that's the main thing. He has said he'll do all the leg work. But he is (purposefully) missing the point! Yet again she is not held to account! I have made my feelings very clear to him and he has agreed that we won't be going out of our way for her in future. If I push it further it deteriorates into a row, hence coming on here to rant.

So I guess I'm annoyed with him too!

ClopySow Tue 25-Oct-16 23:02:32

Why make it a big deal. Just speak to BIL and get furniture back and don't go out of your way again. Lesson learned.

Pineapplemilkshake Tue 25-Oct-16 23:05:05

I agree with another poster - just let SIL know it needs to be returned and give her a date you need it by. It's her responsibility to return it.

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