I just need a rant re DH & FIL

[needtorantnow]

I know I'm being ungrateful here but just need to vent.

I'm self employed so doing my tax is a huge pain in the ass every year. My FIL worked for the revenue his whole life so very very kindly does it with me so I don't have to pay an accountant (it's very complicated and even he struggles with parts of the form at times).

Tax is not due til mid November but FIL and DH have been harassing me since June to sort it out. I ignored them at first as there was no rush & I was in early pregnancy and sick and wrecked. We have no childcare so I work around the kids, during toddler's nap, evenings/weekends and DH uses his holidays when I physically have to go out to work which can be anything from 1-6 days a month. And yes I like to have some downtime too.

I've been busy enough of late so the times I get to sit down to my laptop I've been working, not organising my tax stuff. I'm so fucking sick of them, especially DH telling me to get my act together and get it done. When?!!!! There are barely enough hours in the day as it is. I have another 6 weeks to file the return FFS!

Today FIL informed me he'd be over on Thursday to do it and was annoyed with me when I told him I'm speaking at a conference to promote my business and won't be here! Not to mention I have to prep for it so any time this week i have to spare will go on that, not gathering figures etc!!! We see him every single weekend so we will get it done.

I swear I'd get an accountant in a heartbeat if I didn't think it's cause ructions! Aaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

[DustyOfSkye]

YABU. Keep family and business separate. Get an accountant.

[Hassled]

Are you absolutely sure you're not a tiny bit guilty of avoidance tactics here? I'm a master at them myself - so I tend to recognise a fellow avoider :o. Putting my head in the sand is what I do best - I have a suspicion this might also be you. Mid-November is not that far away, you need to give your FIL time to do what he does, especially as it's so complicated, you need time to find those receipts or whatever. So stop procrastinating and get it done (and I mean this kindly, because I know what a bastard it is)

[Stevefromstevenage]

Get an accountant. DH has been doing ours and it takes bloody ages. He got an accountant this year. I am already excited on his behalf.

[needtorantnow]

It won't take that long. I've most of the stuff ready, need maybe 2 hours to go over it all myself and then it usually takes 1-1.5 hours to actually fill in the return with FIL.

I'm defo an avoider to an extent but they both know I'm pregnant, minding 3 kids and have had a good bit of actual work to do. And to get pissed off with me coz I'm actually working the day he wants to do it, FFS!!!!

I think I will find an accountant from next year. My dad's accountant just died so he needs a new one and I'll just say he's doing me a deal or something. I can't do this next year when I'll have a baby too!

[Lovewineandchocs]

How long does it normally take? Can you clear some time in advance and arrange a fixed date to do it that suits both of you? You say you see him every single weekend so if you arrange some time on a Sat or Sun and both of you have that date in your diaries, that should stop any hassling in the meantime. People tend to get anxious when there is a deadline looming and no definite plans have been made to meet it. I don't agree with them hassling you when you were sick in early pregnancy but maybe you have procrastinated in previous years? No judgement, I put off difficult and boring things all the time