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unsolicited advice re: sleep

(7 Posts)
MarcelineTheVampire Tue 21-Jun-16 15:19:16

My DD is 6 months and still wakes 3 times in the night- I am beyond frazzled.

I honestly don't think I am able to take another person telling me 'oooh my baby slept through from 6 weeks', 'you should switch to formula, she would sleep right through then', 'you have to sleep train her- just let her cry she'll soon learn'.

The advice is completely unsolicited - I may be frazzled and look like crap but I am more than happy to get up with DD as I know it's not going to be forever I hope.

Why do people seem to delight in advising you that their baby is wonderful and you must be doing something wrong? I feel like crying half the time because people assume I'm doing something wrong because she's still waking up and label her a bad baby. AIBU in telling the next person to give completely unsolicited advice to shut up?

limon Tue 21-Jun-16 15:31:48

yanbu and have my sympathy. This too shall passflowers

PPie10 Tue 21-Jun-16 15:35:32

People are just well meaning, not sinister or out to make you feel intentionally bad.

Gardencentregroupie Tue 21-Jun-16 15:37:16

You could give them unsolicited advice about something in their lives. 'Oooh you drive a Kia? Handling is rubbish and fuel efficiency is shit. Why don't you sell your car and get a ford ecoboost.' 'Oh your hair looks very greasy. Why don't you only wash every other day and try dry shampoo in between?' That sort of thing. Except don't really, I suppose. Most people are just doing it because they care and want you to be not so tired, highly aggravating though it is to demonstrate their affection that way.

brewbrewbrew <--- good strong ones.

MarcelineTheVampire Tue 21-Jun-16 15:39:40

I'm probably being over sensitive half the time but when I'm tired I can't cope with it!!

53rdAndBird Tue 21-Jun-16 16:15:01

YANBU. They probably mean well, but so did the people who kept suggesting sodding ginger biscuits would cure my hyperemesis. You can be well-meaning and still deeply annoying. "Oooh, you just need a Good Bedtime Routine, that'll sort it!" Fuck off.

The worst ones are the "well mine always slept great due to my superior parenting skills" people, definitely. I had an acquaintance on Facebook that was like this - just kept popping up in any sleep discussion to say "I don't know why people make such a fuss about sleep, I just put little Maxolon in his cot and leave him to sing to himself and he's asleep in five minutes! God, it's hardly rocket science!" (Haven't heard anything from her in a while, come to think of it. I'm guessing either baby #2 was less angelic or somebody pushed her into a swamp.)

MarcelineTheVampire Tue 21-Jun-16 16:39:31

53rd haha- those people are the WORST. I've had so many of those on my Facebook and to my face, I can barely contain my rage sometimes- now they aren't well meaning at all, they are smug bastards.

I also get the rage at those people who 3 week old is sleeping well and try to give me advice - yes my newborn slept fairly well until 3 months thank you angry

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