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AIBU?

Is this bad form

13 replies

Thefaceandtheblonde · 17/06/2016 17:31

Due to go on weekend to mutual friend's house with friends a and b (two closest friends).

Have been ill all week and plan was to head over tonight until sun.

Have now decided would be more sensible/better for recovery to stay home tonight with tea and comforts then head over early tomorrow, therefore only missing an evening. They were planning to have a quiet one in then have a bday dinner tomorrow so I will be with friend for that to toast her bday and although I would love to be there tonight, at least I will come tomorrow for that. I won't be going hard but do want to be there for at least some of it.

Two friends have been fine about it, one hasn't replied and now I feel really bad. I never get ill and don't miss things lightly. I feel guilty nevertheless though like I should have forced myself to go? I'm not expecting much to change health-wise between tonight and tomorrow just trying not to over exert myself. I feel like one friend may think I'm making excuses :( that is really not the case

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ILostItInTheEarlyNineties · 17/06/2016 17:37

Don't overthink it, you've sent a polite message to your friends and none have complained. It maybe that the friend that hasn't got back to you is busy or hasn't seen the message( or isn't such a great friend as the other two Grin)

No point turning up tonight feeling rough, that's no fun for anyone!
Get well soon Flowers

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Thefaceandtheblonde · 17/06/2016 18:05

Thank you! Still no reply, they're on the bus there with just their phone and have read it (FB messenger)... Urgh if it had been me I would have said "get well soon"!!

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FireTruckOhFireTruck · 17/06/2016 18:06

Don't worry about it, it does sound like you're overthinking it (I would too!)

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WorraLiberty · 17/06/2016 18:07

Why not ring her? Confused

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Thefaceandtheblonde · 17/06/2016 18:12

I'm worried because I could have said something earlier in the day but only said it late afternoon. She will still have our other friend there for company though. Don't want to ring as that makes it into a huge deal.

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Crispbutty · 17/06/2016 18:17

Are they together on a bus? Could it be that as they know and one has replied then they dont think everyone has to reply?

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Thefaceandtheblonde · 17/06/2016 18:22

No no she's by herself going to meet other friend at the place. Argh can't but feel I have messed up.

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WorraLiberty · 17/06/2016 18:28

How does ringing her make it into a 'huge deal'?

"Hiya, did you get my text earlier? I'm still feeling a bit crap so I think it's best all round".

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ILostItInTheEarlyNineties · 17/06/2016 18:33

Crispbutty is probably right, I'm sure they think they don't all have to reply.
How can you have messed up? You thought you might feel up to it, but don't and have let everyone know. You're ill for goodness sake!

If it makes you feel better, send a message saying something like, "Really gutted I can't join you tonight, hope you're not upset that I cancelled at short notice.." then put it out of your mind and have a nice relaxed evening so you feel better tomorrow.

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TheIncredibleBookEatingManchot · 17/06/2016 18:41

You've done nothing wrong by cancelling due to illness.

Your friend's done nothing wrong by not replying.

(Maybe she's standing up on the bus or it's really bumpy so it would be difficult to send a message?)

Everything's fine. Stop worrying, relax and get better, and enjoy the rest of the weekend with your friends.

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nonladyofleisure · 17/06/2016 18:44

I have a group of 5 friends we see each other once every couple of months... One of us always has something come up, health issues etc... We say we will see you next time xx hope everything ok... And we have a group what's app to catch up with random bollox the rest of the time.. If you had lied then I would say you're being silly but you're seeing them tomorrow! Xx

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ILostItInTheEarlyNineties · 17/06/2016 18:45

What a great name, TheIncredibleBookEatingManchot

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TheIncredibleBookEatingManchot · 17/06/2016 18:57

Thanks ILostIt!

I'd just ben reading "The Incredible Book Eating Boy" by Oliver Jeffers to the DCs when I chose my name.

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