To hand my notice in before new job is set in stone?

[AlicesChains16]

I've worked at my place for 6 months. Don't mind the job but the hours are ridiculous and I never get to see my family. I have to work every other weekend and often until 8pm most nights. Whenever I'm off work, everyone else is working and I end up sat about bored. Whenever I'm at work, everyone else is at home chilling out!
Anyway I got offered another job with much better hours. Ive accepted and all they're waiting for is the reference from my manager.
Manager does not want me to leave - I suspect because they find it difficult to recruit to this place and they are already short staffed. I called HR today and they have chased the reference twice and still heard nothing back.
Manager has previously advised me not to hand in my notice until everything is set in stone and then she would want 4 weeks notice. I could be wrong but I suspect the stall in getting the reference back is deliberate as it means I'm stuck there longer.

Would it be too risky for me to hand my notice in on Monday anyway and ask manager to respond to reference when I do it? if I've already handed my notice in, it won't benefit them to stall it ...

[ALemonyPea]

I'd hand notice in.