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AIBU?

Tell me to get a grip! Going on holiday

25 replies

MsJamieFraser · 25/04/2016 05:08

Going on a girls holiday today and I'm just wanting to lock the front doors, I've not even left and I'm already missing my children (who stayed out at their grandparents last night) ds2 cried when I kissed and cuddled him and ds1 who never ever gives out kisses gave me the biggest kiss and cuddle and told me to have a good time and he will be super good with his brother....

My husband is asleep next to me and all I want is to go back into bed and sleep beside him

I NEED A GRIP, I'm only away for 5days, I've ever been away from my children this long Sad

OP posts:
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PinkPjamas · 25/04/2016 05:42

Well, you're going now so it's done,so your options are give yourself a shake and try your best to enjoy it,your children will be fine, or not.
That's how I deal with things,anyway! It isn't long but I understand how it can feel it!

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pearlylum · 25/04/2016 05:50

Nothing is fixed in stone. But if you have made your decision then go for it. Not my cup of tea going away without my kids, but each to their own.

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Wilding · 25/04/2016 06:01

Aah saying goodbye is always the hardest bit, you'll have a great time once you're away. Where are you going?

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WillIEverBeASizeTen · 25/04/2016 06:41

I only went away once without my DD (only had her at that stage) missed her so badly I never did it again. I'm not saying it's wrong at all..I was just so miserable I didn't want to do it again.

OP your children are in good hands..enjoy your break..you'll have a fab time:)

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Only1scoop · 25/04/2016 07:00

I can't tell you to 'get a grip' as I'm the person who only used to go for one night on a two or three night hen do....

They will see their dad though?

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ChubbyPolecat · 25/04/2016 07:03

Get a grip! (You asked for it!) You deserve a break and you're going to have a great time!

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TurnOffTheTv · 25/04/2016 07:06

Of course you'll miss them, but you will be home on Friday and you will have had a lovely few relaxing days in the sun! I'm jealous Grin

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QOD · 25/04/2016 07:06

You've said goodbye, I know 1 cried but they've accepted it
honestly honestly I'd go
1st time I left dd overnight she was nearly 2, I had to go away 1 night with work. She was utterly distraught that night at bedtime and dh rang me hundreds of miles away saying he couldn't cope. I had to ring my my. At 11.30pm and send her down there.
My point? I didn't go away again until she was 11, she didn't cope with sleepovers, she didn't go to any grandparents or aunts, she literally only slept away from home last summer aged 16 1/2 and found it very stressful
I genuinely think it's good for them, and you, to realise you can "survive" apart
even now, dh snd I have never both left her ... she is horrified at the suggestion
honestly I regret lots of parenting decisions and this is a main one due to the affect it had on her.

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TestingTestingWonTooFree · 25/04/2016 07:13

I went away for 2 nights when my baby was about 7 months old (it was a near compulsory work thing). I cried leaving. After that I had a great time. Baby was fine without me. Be brave and go.

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pearlylum · 25/04/2016 07:14

QOD- it doesn't always work like that though. I never left my kids overnight when they were small, but by the time they were 6 or 7 were very happy to go on sleepovers, very confident and happy.

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donajimena · 25/04/2016 07:15

I'm one of those who feels no guilt at my children being away from home. I love a child free break and they are happy with grandparents..but I still get a knot of anxiety about leaving for more than one night and I hate being in the house if they are away for the night (I'm fine when I'm out just not at home)
Chances are you'll feel better when you actually go. Flowers

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ApocalypseSlough · 25/04/2016 07:15

Have a super time. Everyone will be fine without you!

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Roseberrry · 25/04/2016 07:16

You can do it, you'll regret it if you don't! It'll be hard to be away from them but I bet you anything the break will do you good.

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Drinksforeveryone · 25/04/2016 07:38

It will all be fine. Once you get on the holiday and start having fun it will be much easier. Buy them both a nice little gift from your destination.

I left my son quite often - he was with his dad usually, sometimes his grandma.

I am more concerned about leaving him home alone for two weeks now that he is 18... Grin

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notmaryberry · 25/04/2016 07:38

I'm always anxious about leaving them but once I'm out of the house I'm fine.

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Whatshebuildinginthere · 25/04/2016 07:41

I am rubbish at leaving my children but I remember really loving staying with my grandparents when I was a child and my parents were away. Some of my happiest memories. I hope you have a lovely time.

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MrsBobDylan · 25/04/2016 07:41

I did a girls holiday last summer and was hoping I'd miss my flight and kept wanting to pull out . I spent the holiday missing them. But I came home and they'd been absolutely fine! Very pleased to see me, no grudges held.

They coped much better than I did with the separation, I'm going again this year and am determined to relax this time!

Go for it, you'll love it, they'll be fine.

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FV45 · 25/04/2016 07:53

I used to ask myself what would happen if I had to be away from the children at short notice e.g. accident or extended family illness or something.

It's useful for all concerned to know that things run smoothly when the main carer giver is away.

In my experience the kids are always fine while the Mum's heart is sore. It'll be like Xmas when you get back. Enjoy your time away.

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NapQueen · 25/04/2016 07:56

I love child free time!! Five day break with friends? Yes please.

OP try and relax. In under a week you will be back to not being able to go to the loo in peace / clambered all over / being called "Mum,mum,muuuuuuuuuuum"

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JessieMcJessie · 25/04/2016 08:07

Depends how much you like your friends and/ or if you are doing things with them you couldn't do with him, like a specific hobby or sport or something. 5 days seems quite long. I am very fond of my closest friends but always prefer doing big things like holidays with DH.

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sparkleglitterdaisy · 25/04/2016 08:15

I used to love going to stay with my grandparents when I was a child . I'd have been really disappointed if my parents came back for me the next day !! So go and enjoy your holiday . This will give them special bonding time with their grandparents .

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Unicow · 25/04/2016 08:16

It's good for kids to learn that mum can go away and then come back. All those who are saying it was a huge regret and the kids were super distressed need to think about what they would do if God forbid they had to go into hospital. How much better to get the kids able to cope when there isn't mega stress and an emergency?

Mine have been away from me for probably about 10 days max in their lives but it is enough that when I was in hospital for 3 days they settled for sil. I can't imagine how much more stressful it all would have been if they were all going mental because they had never been left.

Go and enjoy yourself OP it's good for you AND your kids for you to have a break in my experience. Enjoy it.

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firesidechat · 25/04/2016 08:21

Are you going to Center Parcs? I'm sure you will have a lovely time once you're there, wherever it is. I had a few breaks like this years ago and on the whole it was great fun and a lovely break from looking after other people all the time. I also suspect that your friends are less inclined to drama than my lot were.

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Nocabbageinmyeye · 25/04/2016 08:38

I have been away loads on child free breaks, the first time dh, although we weren't married at the time, found me sobbing on my balcony after talking to dd on the third night, i said "I miss her so much", he said "no you don't, your put out that she doesn't miss you at all", he said it jokingly but he was right, she was having a ball at my parents and had no time to talk to me, I was fine after that, had a great time but looked forward to seeing her again.

Go - have a great time, you deserve it, there is I point in the turning into a debate on "oh I wouldn't leave my kids" crap, it's booked, your leaving today, the kids are having their own holiday too so get a grip and enjoy Wink honestly your a person outside being a mam and a wife - enjoy!! I'm jealous

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Nocabbageinmyeye · 25/04/2016 08:39

No point turning this into a debate (sorry it's early Grin)

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