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Next time I throw up to do it on DH

(17 Posts)
Dollymixtureyumyum Wed 13-Apr-16 06:56:26

I won't but it's tempting
I have been poorly the last 24 hours with a sickness bug. DH was a work yesterday and DS at nursery so I spent the day in bed. When DH walked in last night he said "oh you look so much better" and this morning just now after I said I had been being sick all night he said "oh really you look so well"
It's just seems that he tells me I look well and that translates to "you need to think about helping with DS now".
In fairness he does do his bit when I am ill but I always feel like it it begrudged. I just hate being told I look well when I feel like crap.
Why can't he take my word for it, I am not ill very often and it just feels he is implying that I am putting it on a bit.
I am prob being a cow I know

DustyBustle Wed 13-Apr-16 07:05:28

I suspect he thinks if he says it it will somehow be true that you're all better. I wouldn't assume that he's saying pull yourself together and get your arse out of bed though.

Dollymixtureyumyum Wed 13-Apr-16 07:06:39

I know Dusty I am overreacting. I just want to get better without felling guilty

MumOnTheRunCatchingUp Wed 13-Apr-16 07:18:02

Why would you say you'd like to vomit on him? What would that solve

LumpySpacedPrincess Wed 13-Apr-16 07:36:34

That's really passive aggressive. Seriously, when you've been up all night vomiting who honestly thinks it's appropriate to tell you that you look well.

The only person who used to do this to me was a pushy boss who wouldn't tolerate sickness amongst staff.

scoobyloobyloo Wed 13-Apr-16 07:37:11

Think that was probably at little bit of lighthearted humour to get across the fact that OPs DH was not taking her illness seriously.

I wouldn't let it worry you too much.

LumpySpacedPrincess Wed 13-Apr-16 07:37:41

If you did vomit on him then he would get sick and you could tell him how well he looks! smile

coldcanary Wed 13-Apr-16 07:53:13

I see what you mean but I'm not sure it's any better the other way around - last time I was sick DH got up and said 'stay in bed love you look like shit'.
Which didn't really help.

Dollymixtureyumyum Wed 13-Apr-16 07:55:30

I was being lighthearted grin
I think he thinks it makes me feel better when in reality I just want to punch him

Dollymixtureyumyum Wed 13-Apr-16 07:56:17

But i won't punch him, I wouldn't dream of it, again it's a turn of phrase

Fratelli Wed 13-Apr-16 08:07:04

In fairness he does do his bit when I am ill but I always feel like it it begrudged That's the real issue. He should parent your son equally all the time. Then he wouldn't be incapable of looking after his own son when you're ill.

Dollymixtureyumyum Wed 13-Apr-16 09:14:01

Grrrr I got up with DS this morning and said to DH I would give him a lie in and then I would go back to bed.
He has just said I will give you an hour and then we can go out for the day
I have told him to get lost unless he wants his car full of vomit to leave me alone.
This is the guy who led on the sofa for two weeks with a sore knee and did not do anything.

Osmiornica Wed 13-Apr-16 09:18:00

Are you sure he just doesn't mean that you still look nice and don't look like shit? I wouldn't necessarily assume he meant anything deep by that comment.

RaspberryOverload Wed 13-Apr-16 09:19:45

He needs to respect the fact you are ill.

Don't feel guilty about staying in bed, if that's what you need. He can parent his own son, and shouldn't be trying to push you into doing something you're not capable of right now.

AlwaysDancing1234 Wed 13-Apr-16 10:00:27

My DH is like this when I'm ill. I recently had a severe D&V bug, up all night with it. The following day DH said I "looked better" and still went off for the day with his friend as planned, he was 3 hours late getting back. I was ill and almost passed out through dehydration and lack of sleep. I was livid, not fair on me or kids.
Fast forward 2 days and he got the same bug, he was dying and took to his bed, it took 48 hours of the bug for him to realise how bad I had been and to apologise profusely for being a twat. Maybe your DH will get the bug and realise how it feels. angry

LumpySpacedPrincess Thu 14-Apr-16 16:11:13

Why are you a lesser citizen in your own home?

Theladyloriana Thu 14-Apr-16 20:07:00

My life exactly. H is now ex. Eventually, I didn't expect any help whatsoever, even if it I had to literally hold the baby side ways while I vomited with a gastric bug for 4 days. But that's an emotionally abusive, gas lighting relationship for you. Hope he's better in other ways, op. It's a relief to be on my own now and not go through the pain of someone not caring and not helping, right in front of me.

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