to not really want to be brushed off about this?

[SingingSamosa]

Posting here for traffic as much as anything really.

My 6.5 year old DD (middle child) has suffered pretty much all her life with what seems like really bad nappy rash in her privates. It doesn't affect her bum, just her actual labia but all the way up and back. The doctors originally told me it was bacterial vaginosis when she was a baby and I had prescription cream for it (Timodine). Despite hourly nappy changes she'd still get it and it was so so sore. They told me it would disappear when she started potty training but she was potty trained at 2 and it still comes back periodically.

We have been back to the doctors numerous times - she was even referred to a paediatrician at one point but they've all said there's no bacterial or fungal issue (from swabs). They think the main issue is that she doesn't manage to wipe away all her wee when she goes to the loo but she tries so hard to do this yet it still comes back. I (and she) apply nappy cream when it starts to get a bit sore again but it's not that effective.

Last night I was up with her for two hours whilst she screamed in pain and her labia were very inflamed and red looking. Eventually a cold flannel, some Calpol, cuddles and lashings of nappy cream eventually soothed her enough to get her to sleep but I'm at my wits' end! Medical professionals have said that there's nothing more they can do. It's horrible hearing her sob and scream and not be able to do anything about it

Surely they can't just fob her off like this? I've watched her wipe after she's been for a wee and there's not any discernible difference in how she does to how her big sister or I do it.

She is a bit of a precious snowflake type in terms of sensitivity - she can't bear wearing certain clothes because they irritate her skin, she can't stand loud or high noises etc. I've always thought this type of 'super sensitivity' was more of a psychological thing that children had than an actual physical thing but perhaps she has very sensitive privates?

Has anyone else experienced anything like this? (Sorry for the long post!!)

[WanderingNotLost]

Oh bless her, that must be so horrible. I can't really think of anything to suggest, except perhaps if she wears girl boxer type underwear? Might at least avoid chafing at the seams which could be adding to the discomfort. Hope you find a solution for her soon.

[OneWordTwoSyllables]

I don't have any sound advice about this but I remember struggling with what I imagine was similar when I was a little girl. I have memories of cold flannels and cuddles as I was sore. I'm assuming I just grew out of it but will check with my mum!

[gleam]

No experience of this but wondered if you've seen a dermatologist?

Could she have a mini shower after going to the toilet (at home)?

[DoreenLethal]

What washing powders are you using? Have you tried some of the natural ones; undies can set off terrible reactions if she is allergic to the powder.

[FlopIsMyParentingGuru]

Have they considered eczema? I don't know if it's possible to get it exactly where she has problems but as a child I had it where my pants elastic went and it was so so sore. It would rub and bleed easily and if I got wee there it was agony.
But in answer to your OP, no you're not being unreasonable to want to not be fobbed off.
I don't know whether paying for a private gynea or dermatology appt is worth it? Others might have relevant experience.

[SingingSamosa]

She saw a paediatrician at the hospital whose speciality was dermatology but he wasn't a dermatologist, if you see what I mean?

I've tried her in different underwear but because of the sensitivity issues I've mentioned in my OP she can't stand the feeling of them getting creased up in her legs and crotch. I even went through a period of washing her underwear separately, in sensitive washing liquid, for about a year to see if that made a difference, but it didn't unfortunately.

[WickedWax]

I was also gong to suggest a dermatologist.

When you get an appointment make sure you go along armed with loads of info for them - how often she bathes (too often perhaps?), material her underwear is made of, products you use - soap powder, soap, toilet tissue (is it bleached/fragranced?).

[wednesdaysocks]

How about a jug by the toilet so that she can rinse instead of wipe?

[PassiveAgressiveQueen]

does she wear tights? as getting over hot and sweaty can make issues worse

[anotherdayanothersquabble]

I wonder if she is reacting to the nappy cream. What is in it?

My son reacts to anything with petroleum in it as well as many nut and seed oils so finding something suitable was a challenge!!!

[Stratter5]

What about trying pantyliners - they'd keep the area cool and crease free, and allow a bit more air to circulate. Poor love, sounds utterly miserable :(

[Babymamamama]

I think in your place I would be strongly asking for gp to refer to dermatologist/paediatrician and for allergy testing. It sounds really distressing and hasn't been resolved so keep going. There must be a reason. Wonder if any of the treatments for ezcema or chicken pox would help in the meantime? Sodium bicarbonate or oats or Aveeno in the bath? Calamine ointment?

[Dashie]

Does she seem to scratch at all, especially at night? I wonder if she might have worms. In little girls this can cause itchiness and soreness around the vulva rather than the anus. If this hasn't been considered it certainly needs ruling out.
Poor thing, it must be so distressing for her.

[SingingSamosa]

I don't bathe the children over often as they are all prone to dry skin if they bathe too often - so they only get showered two or three times a week.

I don't think she's reacting to the nappy cream as that only gets put on when she's actually sore, if you see what I mean?

We've only ever used cotton underwear. I don't think we'd be able to use pantyliners because they'd be too big for her and crease up - she's really tiny. Also, I'd be worried that it might exacerbate the issue given that she was a lot worse when she was wearing nappies.

She does wear tights for school and I have wondered whether not wearing them might help but she can't wear trousers (can't stand the feel of them around her tummy!) and she gets too cold in just long socks!

[Maudofallhopefulness]

Is it ever itchy? I've had eczema there and it can be hell.

Non bio washing powder and push for a dermatologist referral.

[lannypanny]

Could it be lichens sclerosus? I have this and it took ages to be diagnosed. Its an autoimmune condition and can be treated with steroids. It is itchy and can become very sore and inflamed. I hope you get it sorted.

[Pipestheghost]

Bless her, that must be so uncomfortable for her.
Have you tried 'Medi Honey barrier cream' if not, see if your gp will prescribe it or you can buy it online, it's very good.
Is there any way it could be an allergic reaction? Have you tried piriton when she gets it?
I agree with pp that she needs a dermatologist or allergy tests. I hope you get some answers soon.

[Moln]

Sounds absolutely awful. The poor little girl. Defiantly see a dermatologist. It has to be something.

I would also advise really pushing your GP. Get an appointment everytime there's a flare up (I'm suggesting this whilst not living in the uk and I'm aware there's difficulty with GP appointments but what I mean is do not let up, it needs to register with the GP just how bad it is).

[GruntledOne]

You certainly need her to see a dermatologist, but I think she also needs to see a paediatrician about her sensory issues, as she may have a sensory processing problem.

[magicstar1]

I'm a bit like this...if I don't have a daily shower it can be sore. I've tried washing with just water, but it doesn't work for me. Most shower gels etc. make me swell up and get very sore - and don't get me started on scented pads! The only thing I've found that works is Femfresh shower wash...it calms down the area, and stops any itch.
Maybe you could try this?

[Decanter]

Hi OP if she isn't already, I would suggest sleeping without underwear. Even with pj trousers this would help, doesn't need to be a nightie. Poor wee thing, hope you get this resolved for her.

[wotoodoo]

Was she a preemie? Just that there is a lot of research just published about extra sensitivities etc children and adults have been found to suffer from after being one.

[EnidB]

A dermatologist recommended showering with Aveeno moisturising lotion (apparently the water dries out your natural oils) so you rub it over then rinse it off.
I have sensitive skin and use it as a shower cream. Absolutely no soft rinse or baby wipes. Pat dry with kitchen paper ( tissue paper leaves bits behind)
Good luck, it sounds very distressing - definately push to see a dermatologist

[HPsauciness]

My dd had intermittent times like this if she got over hot or wearing synthetic clothes, she also screamed and sobbed many times at night, shouting it hurt. I was really worried, but she seems to have grown out of it, and it was very occasional whereas this sounds like an ongoing issue.

I used to use Sudocream, though, and it was amazing. I have always found it great for spots- it's brilliant for rashes and even in my other child with eczema and poor skin, she's always been able to tolerate it. I taught my dd to put it on herself (for obvious reasons) when she was a few years old and it would calm it down by the next day.

Hope you get this sorted, it was awful seeing my dd cry especially as there wasn't a lot I could do (camomile baths are another one- or camomile tea boiled, then use that to wash the area, pat dry and use Sudocream).