Skip to main content
Skip to main navigation
Skip to talk navigation

Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Saved Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Flip

1 2

AIBU?

Regarding mobile phones at funerals

29 replies

Imogenlasting · 28/10/2015 12:43

I was at a funeral this morning. During the Mass four different mobiles rang despite the priest, after the first phone rang, mentioning it and, after the second phone rang, explicitly asking that phones be turned off.

I can understand that the first time it was simply someone who had forgotten to turn in off (although they let it ring and ring), but surely after that incident and the priest saying something, anyone with a phone in their bag or pocket would immediately think 'did I remember to switch it off'.

AIBU to wonder what is wrong with some people and surely, unless you have a relative having life saving surgery, there is no reason you can't switch your phone off for 45 minutes out of respect for a bereaved family?

OP posts:

Report

TestingTestingWonTooFree · 28/10/2015 12:44

Yep rude. In such circumstances mine is usually on silent and switched off and checked several times.

squoosh · 28/10/2015 12:47

Inconsiderate not to put your phone on silent at a funeral.

Rude as hell not to put your phone on silent after a request to do so.

MissBattleaxe · 28/10/2015 12:56

very very rude and disrespectful. If you can't give the deceased 45 minutes of undivided attention at their own funeral then it's a very sad state of affairs indeed.

Mintyy · 28/10/2015 12:58

Yanbu. People are ignorant fuckers.

BondJayneBond · 28/10/2015 12:59

YANBU.

Puzzledandpissedoff · 28/10/2015 12:59

Yes it was incredibly rude. Granted we all make mistakes, but the trouble is that the boneheads who'll do something like this aren't exactly the ones who are going to take on board a suggestion to switch the bloody thing off

It's all about them, you see, and sod anyone else

MrsJayy · 28/10/2015 13:24

It is so rude phone on silent should enter their heads. I have seen facebook updates from a funeral im not even joking granted it was a young guy and i guess social media is there way but i was astounded at check ins and tagging of other funeral attenders. Was a distant relation of mine so some of it came up on my newsfeed

5Foot5 · 28/10/2015 13:44

Incredibly rude. I think the correct response would be for the people sitting nearby to all turn and stare in utter disgust at the phone owner so that they realise what a faux pas they have made.

VinylScratch · 28/10/2015 13:47

YANBU at all, last funeral I went to I left my phone in the car glovebox because I was paranoid it would malfunction even on silent and ring anyway. Why can some people not be separated from their bloody phone for 5 minutes.

expatinscotland · 28/10/2015 13:48

Incredibly rude.

DamnCommandments · 28/10/2015 13:50

I went to a funeral at which the chief mourner's phone rang. He'd deliberately left it on because his mother was very ill. "Was" being the operative word in this case.

TondelayaDellaVentamiglia · 28/10/2015 13:56

it's incredibly rude!

however I'd say quite a large amount the vast majority of those with smart phones have very little idea of how to use them except for the basics, and any that do are so full of their own self importance they couldn't possibly silence them or switch them off for fear of missing something.

There are very very few circumstances where anyone needs to be INSTANTLY contactable and the sooner people realise this the better.

Topseyt · 28/10/2015 14:15

Very rude indeed.

Mine is off or on silent on such occasions. My three teenage DDs complied with that too at their grandmother's funeral 18 months ago with no questions or arguments.

There is a time and a place to make or take personal calls, and a funeral is neither.

Janeymoo50 · 28/10/2015 14:18

Disgusting, they should be thoroughly ashamed (but I doubt it).

ButterflyUpSoHigh · 28/10/2015 14:30

Disgusting but normal these days. We attend mass every week and every week without fail a mobile goes off.

jeee · 28/10/2015 14:38

At one funeral I went to, a phone went off. The phone's owner actually answered it, and had a hissed conversation... It was so inappropriate that I felt (equally inappropriate) laughter bubble up.

Fluffy40 · 28/10/2015 14:53

I'd just leave mine in the car. I'm not addicted.

PestoSkiissimos · 28/10/2015 14:56

I totally agree with you OP.

But, at DH's funeral 2 years ago I forgot and I had a text during the service. The worst thing was at the time I had "message from the dark side there is" in Yoda's voice for my notifications. I was very, very

Puzzledandpissedoff · 28/10/2015 17:32

Even if there's genuinely a desperate need to remain in contact with someone (perhaps in case of illness) surely most phones can be set to vibrate instead of ring these days?

Certainly all the ones I've had can - and I'm a complete muppet with technology and have never felt the need for an all-singing, all-dancing phone

MorrisZapp · 28/10/2015 17:40

I work in a public search room which has a rule that mobiles phones must not be used. It's written in big letters on every search passpass.

Yet every day there's at least one phone ringing merrily. Sorry to generalise but it's usually older people ie retired age who are the culprits.
They often don't know their own phone enough to a) recognise the ringtone b) switch the phone off and the apparently hardest thing of all, c) finding and using the ringer volume.

Same in the quiet carriage. They look confused, annoyed and irritated when asked to do anything with their phone rather than answer it.

I honestly think all mobile phone providers should talk people through how to use silent mode etc as so many don't even realise it's an option.

Andrewofgg · 28/10/2015 17:40

Inconsiderate not to put your phone on silent at a funeral.

Wrong. Not on silent, O-F-F off!

Topseyt · 28/10/2015 17:45

On silent is fine. That's what I do, and I never bother to even look at it until well after I get home again.

It doesn't have to be off.

ginslinger · 28/10/2015 17:47

Being an old gimmer, i remember a time with no mobiles and we all managed fine. How long does the average funeral last? No more than an hour and you don't need to be contacted. We've become slaves to phones - they're for our convenience not the other way round.

TSSDNCOP · 28/10/2015 18:11

I believe this is amnesty the most rude, arrogant, disrespectful things a person can do. Who could you possibly be that is so important you interrupt a grieving families last moments.

I was at a funeral recently, at the commital a phone started ringing. Had it been mine I'd have thrown my body over my bag like a grenade and legged it. But nooooo Phonegirl rifled through her bag whilst the priest actually had to pause until she found it.

Family and friends were staggered the look I gave her didn't make her burst into flames. She WA slept j n doubt of my disgust after the service ether. Frankly I would have gladly stomped on the phone until it was in smithereeens.

Andrewofgg · 28/10/2015 18:23

As the actor in the London theatre said: Take that fucking thing away and never bring it into a theatre again. Ladies and gentlemen, we are going to go off stage to compose ourselves and then start the scene again.

Only you can't really start a funeral again, can you?

Flip

1 2

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.