Spider laid eggs on babys coat: what do i do?

[Freakingthefeckout]

Just that, I found a spider on the coat of the baby I'm looking after, I tried to get it to go from the coat to a tree trunk outside and eventually it did, but it was reluctant. Only now I've realized there's a clutch of eggs covered with a web on the coat. No idea how to remove it without destroying the eggs, mother spider is gone. Kids mother will be home any minute.

Help?

[ChuffinAda]

Vacuum them off.

[ASettlerOfCatan]

Scrap it all off with a knife?

[Happfeet2911]

A dyson usually works!

[VoldemortsNipple]

Spiders don't hand around waiting for their eggs to hatch. Just scrape them off and put them in a quiet corner off the ground in the garden. I've found spider eggs in trees and bushes, on my washing line and compost bin if that helps.

[BumpTheElephant]

Just scrape them off!

[Purplepoodle]

Scrape off. Do not hoover unless you want live spiders in your hoover

[NomiMalone]

Bin the coat.

Burn the house down.

[WorraLiberty]

Call SSS and tell them she's abandoned her babies.

[Hygge]

Sell the baby and burn down your house.

[CrystalHaze]

Is this for real? You couldn't work out how to get spider eggs off a coat and are anxious because the baby's mother is due back any minute, so rather than just brush them off you started an AIBU to ask what to do?

[MamaLazarou]

Hahahaha brilliant!

[Freakingthefeckout]

Yes, it's for real. I don't see the need in killing something for the sake of convenience and the spider had made a very secure pocket in the fold of the coat to stash the eggs in. I'd have had no dilemma if I'd been willing to dump a kettle of boiling water over them. I've seen people getting spider advice here before, I figured it was the best place to get a quick useful response (rather than the Reddit stock responses '0/10, pics or it didn't happen, cool story brah.')

Anyways, just as I was getting ready to remove the webbing and the eggs, another spider popped out of the coat sleeve and made straight for the eggs (wasn't the mother, she was safely on the tree trunk outside) and looked like it was trying to tear the webbing to eat the eggs so I had to get rid of that one too. Then I managed to very slowly remove the egg sac with all of the eggs intact. They're stowed behind a vine out of the rain now.

The toddler thinks the baby spiders are going to call me Mummy

[VoldemortsNipple]

Ahh, I love spiders. Well done Freaking

[Hadron21]

Inferno.

[msgrinch]

Fire!

[missingmumxox]

Save yourself

[AwkwardSquad]

You've taught the toddler a lovely thing. Unlike when I was a nanny and accidentally taught the toddler to freak the fuck out at spider webs. They absorb things quickly, don't they, little ones

[downgraded]

Remove coat from baby, take baby, leave the house and throw a match through the letter box.

[Jacana]

Love the way they've been put outside but sheltered from the rain. Ahhhh.really heartwarming, that.

[BabyFeets]

Aw op that's such a sweet thing to do, I hate killing spiders too. Flies on the other hand ....

[oddfodd]

You are a very kind person :)

[RachelRagged]

That was a lovely thing to do OP

[Toofattorun]

Get a mixture of cyanide, bleach, hydrofluoric acid, 2,3,7,8-Tetrachlorodibenzo-p-dioxin, strychnine and last but not least, febreze (to make it smell nice you understand), mix it together and drop said coat into concoction. Then fucking bomb the house and live in a sealed oxygen tank.

[Littlegreyauditor]

Burn the shit out of everything. EVERYTHING.

Start with the coat, scorch the garden, bomb the house, leave the country.

Do not use a dyson/Hoover. The fuckers will hatch inside it and solemnly march out the spout en masse.

(Weeps at memory, scratches furiously at self, gibbers)