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Is the school bu or aibu - punishment for not finishing work

(15 Posts)
whojamaflip Wed 01-Jul-15 20:53:56

I've posted about my ds before and his behaviour at school - constant complaints from the ht and ct of fairly mundane things like not getting in with work, fidgeting and messing about.

He is yr3 but presents about 18 mths behind both maturity and emotionally so can be quite silly. He had a serious speech delay which has left him unclear in his speech although it's improving. He has epilepsy but has been weaned off his mess and we are keeping fingers crossed that we have no further fits. His fits as a baby and toddler are the reason he is behind and e can come across as being on the spectrum although this hasn't been formally diagnosed. He is easily distracted and can become confused if instructions aren't given clearly and slowly. He is also reluctant to settle down to work but up till now has worked well with a TA breathing down his neck so to speak!

Anyway long story short I have found out that he was kept in all lunchtime, unsupervised to finish English he failed to do in class, strangely enough with no one keeping on top of him he hasn't finished it again so has been told he has to stay in all lunch time tomorrow to finish it and will be kept in every lunch time for as long as it takes!

I'm not happy - firstly children need down time at lunch, it's been bloody hot here today and I'm annoyed he didn't get to go outside and secondly he should not have been left in his own for 40 minutes with no one supervising esp re the epilepsy!

Want to go into school tomorrow and let rip but wondering if IABU

whojamaflip Wed 01-Jul-15 20:54:47

Should be "weaned of his meds" bloody autocorrect!

thetroubleis Wed 01-Jul-15 20:56:39

To me that doesn't really seem very productive. Does he get classroom support?

caravanista13 Wed 01-Jul-15 21:00:00

Are you sure he was left alone? He could have been told to get on with his work by himself while someone kept an eye on him but didn't help him.

TeenAndTween Wed 01-Jul-15 21:00:46

Unacceptable. Go in and speak firmly. Speak to head or senco if class teacher doesn't seem to be taking it seriously.

whojamaflip Wed 01-Jul-15 21:01:25

No support beyond usual TA help - was assessed by the Senco as not needing any help so all extra support was withdrawn. Still waiting for a copy of her report despite repeated requests hmm

Smartiepants79 Wed 01-Jul-15 21:04:10

Well I wouldn't go in and 'let rip'.
Who has told you he was unsupervised? Are you sure it was all Lunchtime?
First off I would go and check the facts. I find it unlikely that he has been left completely alone and not checked up on at all. Also none of the kids at my shcool went out today. Too hot.
Then I would calmly point out the fact, that keeping him in has achieved nothing and maybe they (and you)need to come up with a better system.
What if he brought it home instead?
Is the work achievable for him?

whojamaflip Wed 01-Jul-15 21:04:23

It was his old support TA who raised it with me this afternoon and told me that she had walked past the classroom and he was in there in his own - his teacher was on playground duty and the class TA was on dining hall duty so there was no one to sit with him. I asked him about his day, who he had played with at lunch etc and wether he had seem the thunderstorm at lunch and that's when he told me what had happened. He doesn't know I've spoken to the other TA either.

whojamaflip Wed 01-Jul-15 21:05:54

Happy to have work brought home to be finished - in fact I would prefer that to a pointless exercise which has achieved precisely nothing!

I won't go in and let rip - I shall have calmed down by the morning!smile

soapboxqueen Wed 01-Jul-15 21:09:15

No no no. There are times when being kept in (or at least the threat of it) works wonders. However, never for children who have a legitimate need for support or a specific strategy. Never for a whole lunch time as it ends up being counter productive. Never alone, that's before you take into consideration his other needs.

What would have happened if he had become ill while he was unsupervised?

I feel quite cross at the being in for an additional lunchtime. What the hell do they think is going to be achieved? That he'll suddenly be able to get all of his work done in no time because he lost a few play times. shock

Double check the facts first. Then tell them you need to have a meeting urgently about the strategies they are using. I would be quiet clear that the punishment is unacceptable for your ds and that leaving him unattended is dangerous. I'd be quite tempted to put in a formal complaint from the get go.

TheNoodlesIncident Wed 01-Jul-15 21:51:17

Is the Senco suitably qualified to assess him and decide he doesn't need any support? Ime Sencos are not actually Educational Psychologists. I think I would be making a formal complaint as well, primarily based on withdrawal of support he clearly needs and secondly the leaving him unsupervised, totally unacceptable imo

This happened when my son was in (I think, we are in the U.S.) year two. I did check and then made my feelings known

I was very unhappy about it.
1) If he didn't get it done in class then what makes you think he will do it unsupervised during lunch when sad and lonely.
2) What happens if there is a fire or a 7 year old makes a bad decision and does something stupid ... they do, that is partly why we supervise them.
3) My son is a black and white kid (which his teacher knew) and knows that he isn't meant to eat in the classroom so he went without lunch all day (how I found out) and also did not leave when he needed the toilet.
4) It doesn't show a great understanding of how kids learn if you think that withdrawing socialising and exercise is going to improve outcomes. If anything it is likely to make things much worse for the afternoon lessons.

At the end of the year DS was assessed for an IEP and it was shown that he needed extra help and support and that being kept in was likely to make some of his issues worse. I had it written in his IEP that if it were necessary for him to stay in that it only be for part of the break and that it was to do 1 on 1 work. I also made it clear that if I found out that they had left my 7 year old completely alone again and something happened it would not be my 7 year old that I held responsible.

It did not happen again.

Icimoi Wed 01-Jul-15 22:17:46

Point out that punishing him for something that is the direct result of his disability is unlawful discrimination. Also point out the direct breach of safeguarding procedures in leaving a child with epilepsy unsupervised. Ask them to think about what support he needs in class to ensure that he does get his work finished.

Fatmomma99 Thu 02-Jul-15 00:17:16

To me there are two issues here. You are upset about a specific incident, and you need to decide how to handle that.

To me, far, far more relevant is that you possibly have a child with an undiagnosed SEN.
You need a diagnosis.

Where I live this is done through PCAMHS, and there is a 5 month waiting list (to even be seen). Therefore, you need a referral to PCAMHS done ASAP. School won't thank you, because it's a piece of work they need to do, but push for it. Because if a diagnosis goes in before you break up, you have a decent chance of being seen before Christmas. If you wait until September, it wont' be until Easter 2016.

If you get a diagnosis, everything else will fall into place.

So if you see the school at all, I would be focussing on that rather than the incident, as distressing as that may have been.

If the school do agree to do a PCAMHS referral, then they should meet with you to complete it. If they do, please don't hold back - list as much information/evidence as possible, because I do referrals at work all the time, and I'm good at them, but my success rate with PCAMHS referrals is about 50% - there's a massive demand for their service which they can't meet (hence 5 month wait currently. Which is good - I've known it be 7).

If you have any questions, then PM me.

Seriously, do push for this.

Good luck and flowers

soapboxqueen Thu 02-Jul-15 00:30:50

I referred to camhs through my gp and the first appointment was 2 months after. Took 5 months from referral to final diagnosis.

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