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AIBU?

Would this be unreasonable?

13 replies

RedKite1985 · 18/06/2015 09:47

DP's birthday next week, it's not a big one and we don't usually go crazy over birthday's. She never asks for anything but she has asked if we can go to a Japanese restaurant that I have been promising to take her to for over a year! I said yes of course darling, anything you want darling (!)

However, I only have about £40 to last until end of the month so would you be pissed off if your partner said they would take you there for your birthday....but a week later instead? I can get us a takeaway on the night plus I have bought her 2 gifts.

She is not high maintenance or anything like that but I would just feel bad because she is a lovely girl :) never asks for anything

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ImSoCoolNow · 18/06/2015 09:53

That's not unreasonablene. I'm sure she would rather delay her birthday celebrations than see you get yourself into debt and/or starve until the end of the month. Just be honest. But DO take her out when you say you will... Hope she has a lovely birthday

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ThinkIveBeenHacked · 18/06/2015 09:54

It would be fine by me! If I wanted to try a specific restaurant id rather go after payday so I could indulge.

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diddl · 18/06/2015 09:57

I think I'd be a bit annoyed if this was all I'd asked for.

But it's not worth getting into debt for!

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MissMuesli · 18/06/2015 09:57

I would be mortified if my DP took me out when he couldn't afford it! Maybe say you've got something planned for her birthday day but you can go X weekend.

You could make the day special ecen though you don't have much money. One of my favourite things is a posh picnic (with a picnic blanket) in New unexplored beauty spots. Simple but romantic and a nice way to spend time together

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MissMuesli · 18/06/2015 09:59

By the way as a side note you probably should try and be honest straight away next time, as then you could have avoided this dilemma! But I understand it's not easy!

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RedKite1985 · 18/06/2015 10:01

We do live together so we know we sometimes both struggle.

And she only asked me abotu that place 2 days ago so not much time to prepare :(

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diddl · 18/06/2015 10:04

In the OP you put that you have been promising to take her for over a year.

It's not much of a stretch to think that she might want to finally go there on her birthday!

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feebeecat · 18/06/2015 10:04

And opinion from the other side - my birthday is near the end of the month & I have lost count of the times dh said he had no money/I'd have to wait. I'm not 'high maintenance' & not really that bothered about birthdays, but this used to annoy the bejeezus out of me. It's the same date every year, I don't move it & suddenly spring it on him, make some effort (as I did with his, also end of month birthday) and plan ahead!!
That said, it's a bit late now - maybe you could pretend not to be hungry & just watch?? clutching at straws Or, if it's a one off, you could be fine. Either way, good luck Grin

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BeautyQueenFromMars · 18/06/2015 10:05

Could you make her a nice voucher for a dinner at the japanese restaurant, and give it to her on her birthday? If you book the date in advance, you could put the date on the voucher too. Then she has something tangible that promises the meal she's asked for, and she'll know she doesn't have long to wait.

Much like giving theme park or concert tickets.

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Gdydgkyk · 18/06/2015 10:06

Can you budget for it next year? This year have a delayed celebration two weeks late

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BeautyQueenFromMars · 18/06/2015 10:08

Darn, misread your OP as your DD had asked for the meal, sorry!

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Bookaholic · 18/06/2015 10:18

It would be fine with me, in your place I'd make her a fancy 'gift certificate' for the restaurant, maybe book a table for a couple of weeks time and put the date on there.

"Gift certificate redeemable for one meal at Fancy Restaurant. Valid on Date"

Something along those lines.

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crymeariverwoo · 18/06/2015 10:28

I would be fine with it :)

BeautyQueen it is the OPs DP not DD.

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